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Transitioning and not suffering

Started by taru, July 21, 2007, 03:12:40 AM

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taru

It seems that for many people here transition has been extremely painful and this post is not meant to invalidate their experiences.

However some people seem to forget that transitioning does not equal to suffering for all people. I think a large part of how much one suffers depends on the environment and how one defines happiness inside the head.

Sure I lost a work place and am not on speaking terms with my parents, but I don't consider those worth suffering in my own case. I am happy transitioning and have lots of supporting people. And it seems quite easy to do in my case - good environment really helps.

Any other people whose transitions have not been (to this day) extremely painful?


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tinkerbell

Personally I have never met any TS person whose transition is/was a walk in the park.  How we get to start our journey may vary greatly, but once we have started it, the ride is equally painful for everyone as we are now on the same boat trying to survive like everyone else.

tink :icon_chick:
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taru

The boats are quite different in different countries, cultures and wealth.

Am I somehow faulty if it is not that painful for me? Surviving seems much easier now than pretransition.

Having very accepting loved ones, good friends, universal health care covering SRS and living in a liberal area & niche makes things easier.

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Maud

Quote from: Tink on July 21, 2007, 04:34:20 AM
Personally I have never met any TS person whose transition is/was a walk in the park.


Yo.


It was the easiest thing I ever did.
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Buffy

I personally think we all suffer during transition in one way or another, it is a stressful time for all of us who are brave enough to go this this.

Emotionally, we are taken through highs and lows, elation and dissapointments, our emotions go through a rollercoaster of feelings as we adjust to the hormonal changes. The stress involved in coming out to family, friends colleagues cannot be underestimated on the potential effect on health, I know on many occassions during this period, it was only kept going by nice people at the end of phones, who listened to me crying and saying how lonely I felt.

Then there is the Physical pain, I had never had an operation (not even a tooth out) until I transitioned then had  Electrolysis, FFS, SRS and BA and had to take months off work to recover, recuperate, swelling, bruising, ohh yeah, I suffered for sure.

Unless you have a sugar Daddy, totally covered by all inclusive insurance, we suffer out of pocket as well. As well as the surgeries, there is name changes, Documents changes, travel, therapists (who cause a lot of stress at times).

Apart from the above, transition was actually fairly easy, ie the cross over between living and working as a Woman, went very well.

So I guess a "stress free" transition is not possible.


Buffy
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gothique11

Transitioning isn't always easy, or a "walk in the park" like someone mentioned. It involves a lot of change, stress, and work. Besides, we're girls and we have the right to bitch a long the way. :)

Now, some TS people come out looking like victims. I suppose that that can happen. Although, I don't see myself as a victim, but rather someone who's kicking ass and being brave enough to get through this ->-bleeped-<-.

I think when you are first starting out, feelings of resentment and so on are natural until you resolve them. It doesn't mean you're necessarily playing victim, but you're resolving the inner-self. That is an important step.

Being TS isn't easy, and doing something about it isn't easy either. People who get up and do something about being TS are very brave. They are doing something that most people couldn't do; TS or not, most people can't even deal with there inner-selves and actually have the guts to be who they are and follow through with it.

Change isn't easy. Change can hurt. Change can make you cry. But, change makes you who you are. Change can make you happy. Change can make you free.

But, if you're changing you're not playing victim.Playing victim is stilling around saying woe is me, and not actually doing anything -- it's not being who you really are or following through with it. It's useless and you just feel like crap all the time and you go no where.

But if someone is bitching or having a hard time for a moment, it doesn't mean that they are suffering or playing victim -- if they are working on it and need a shoulder to cry on, then that's fine, and after they'll climb the mountain.
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