The trigger for the thread actually was the collateral damage if you will caused by dysphoria, the pain for the SO's. None of which would have occurred had our true identities been nurtured in childhood, for our SO's would have been attracted to our true centers. I just do not wish to push my own needs ahead of others, neither do I wish to compromise my identity to being un genuine.
It was also due to the misperception of others that we either have choice, or can choose our personality and gender types out of some selfish place.
Hopefully societal trends towards acceptance will help the future young trans coming into the picture now, so that they can discover and nurture their true selves and not be hurt like we have.
God Bless.