hey all, Ive been lurking for a little bit and finally decided to sign up and join in.
Im Jay. I started seriously questioning whether i needed to transition or not about two years ago, and went through a mini mental breakdown. Im 23, a full time student, and i hold two part time jobs. Anyway... through my university's counseling center, I was able to find some help in coping with my new found transition options and was given some pointers on where to find resources in my area.
while i feel very ready to take the next steps in transitioning with testosterone, im kind of at an impasse. i am a hair away from graduating from uni, and am also a hair away from possibly starting my career (one that is heavily male dominated and also one that i was told i couldnt or shouldnt do because im a girl). i dont know what to do and all the anxiety that ive been able to pacify is flaring up yet again.
i also feel very alone in that i am chinese, and i havent met very many chinese or asian trans friends. there is a disconnect between my parents and i that i cant bridge, partly because i dont even know how to explain myself to them. im so paralyzed with fear. i came out to my mother (parents are divorced) as a lesbian when i was maybe 16 years old, and she had asked me if i was sure. and sure, i was sure. if i was a girl and i liked girls, what else was there to question? but then she asked me if i wanted to be a boy. and i lied and said no. mainly because i had finally found acceptance in the lesbian community and my brain didnt know how to deal with transgender topics. i didnt even know that transitioning was an option.
well that quickly turned into a wall of text. thank you for reading.
the community here seems to be amazing, and i hope ill be able to contribute to its greatness.
