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Facing surgery alone

Started by ZoeM, May 26, 2014, 03:34:29 PM

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ZoeM

So, my boyfriend (whom I'd been counting on to be with me through my surgery) lied, cheated, and left. I'm now facing the prospect of making it through surgery (two weeks from now) on my own.

While I may be kinda naive from time to time I don't intend to be any more foolish than I have to. I need to know how I can prepare now to best survive the next month.
Don't lose who you are along the path to who you want to be.








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Ms Grace

I'm really sorry to hear that, Zoe. :(

Can't offer you any suggestions as I'm pre-op myself, I just hope you can find someone else who can be there for you, you shouldn't have to go through that alone. Hugs.
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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mrs izzy

Quote from: ZoeM on May 26, 2014, 03:34:29 PM
So, my boyfriend (whom I'd been counting on to be with me through my surgery) lied, cheated, and left. I'm now facing the prospect of making it through surgery (two weeks from now) on my own.

While I may be kinda naive from time to time I don't intend to be any more foolish than I have to. I need to know how I can prepare now to best survive the next month.

First off you will not be alone here. I will be around as you need.

I am sorry things went south with your BF but it happens so to often. Hugs.

I just was there with 2 girls who traveled alone. I will report that the had smiles on there faces today.

A fyi Brassard has made some changes for what I see in there after care to make it less of a hassle.

Also has dropped #1 dilator from the schedule.

So Zoe just drop me a private message if you would like some company while here.

Isabell
Mrs. Izzy
Trans lifeline US 877-565-8860 CAD 877-330-6366 http://www.translifeline.org/
"Those who matter will never judge, this is my given path to walk in life and you have no right to judge"

I used to be grounded but now I can fly.
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ZoeM

You know I'd love company, Izzy. :)
The thought of facing surgery is so much easier when I know I can have friends there with me.
Don't lose who you are along the path to who you want to be.








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Donna Elvira

Hi Zoé,
First of all, I'm really sorry to hear how things have played out for you. Not cool to say the least!
Other than that, while I'm miles away in Europe, I'd be happy to chat with you on Skype, both during your stay and when you get home.
Wishing you all the best.
Donna
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teeg

Kudos for having the strength to go it alone! :)

One positive is at least you have a couple weeks to prepare and coordinate, it could be worse.

Your buddy accompanying you through your surgery is basically also your, "helper." Helping you buy groceries, cook meals, help you out of a chair, carry your bags for you on your ride/flight home, etc. Consider that these will now be things you'll need to accomplish on your own. Recovering from SRS can be comparable to someone who just gave birth or had a hysterectomy -- climbing in and out of a car, a flight of stairs, bending over and stretching... these can all be challenging and painful.

Stocking up on easily accessible and easily prepared foods (and anything else like supplies, clean laundry, etc.) will save you trips to the store. Pack light on your trip -- everything you take with you you'll have to take home possibly in a weaker and painful state.

Going this alone is certainly manageable, where there's a will there's a way!
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Vicky

I am so happy to hear that Izzy is going to be there for you.  At least you got rid of 300 pounds of ugly fat (head) before hand.  You did not need that during your recovery.  Good luck and I am sure you will do fine.  You have a real friend there for sure. 
I refuse to have a war of wits with a half armed opponent!!

Wiser now about Post Op reality!!
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Shantel

Quote from: Vicky on May 26, 2014, 07:56:09 PM
I am so happy to hear that Izzy is going to be there for you.  At least you got rid of 300 pounds of ugly fat (head) before hand. You did not need that during your recovery.  Good luck and I am sure you will do fine.  You have a real friend there for sure.

Amen to that comment! Best wishes to you Zoe and hopes for a quick recovery. It's a real blessing to have Izzy willing to be such a sweet doll and friend to you.
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AnneB

I almost wish there was one of us that managed/owned a small hotel/motel, for us to recover in.. it would be an awesome idea, but sadly, one that would likely not happen, 'less one of us hits the lottery..
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dkl

Hey Zoe,

I'm one of the two that izzy spoke about, and yes I was smiling!! I flew to Montreal alone, but I don't feel I was alone once I got there. The nurses and support staff were awesome, and of course Izzy dropped by two or three times.

The advice I would give is not to worry about your time in Montreal. Just make sure you have what you need stockpiled at home. I was able to drive a short distance to the store about 4 days after I got home, but i wouldn't wait till then to pick up supplies.

Kristin
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ZoeM

No worries - I have a mountain of supplies (literally all the water-based KY jelly Target had in stock, among other things) stashed away. More chicken fingers than any sane woman would ever eat... and so much soup!
I can't wait. I've had a ridiculous grin and butterflies in my stomach all week. And now ... All that remains is to sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride.
Don't lose who you are along the path to who you want to be.








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Misato

When I think of you Zoe I find myself thinking of a graceful and determined woman. So while I imagine the break up still does sting and having a close hand to hold would be very comforting, getting through this solo I bet is going to set the stage for great things in your new life ahead.

Good luck. May all those butterflies carry you to joy and guide your surgeon's hand to their best work.
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mrs izzy

Just to give a update and I know she will also do more later.

I can report that Zoe is back in her room and as she said "je suis une femme"

:)

Isabell

Mrs. Izzy
Trans lifeline US 877-565-8860 CAD 877-330-6366 http://www.translifeline.org/
"Those who matter will never judge, this is my given path to walk in life and you have no right to judge"

I used to be grounded but now I can fly.
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Claire (formerly Magdalena)


I'd rather see the world from another angle
We are everyday angels
Be careful with me 'cause I'd like to stay that way



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Donna Elvira

Puisqu'il de bon ton de parler en français à Montréal, toutes mes félicitations Zoé et tous mes vœux de bonheur pour la suite!
Chaleureusement
Donna
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AnneB

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Shantel

Quote from: mind is quiet now on June 11, 2014, 01:13:30 PM
Just to give a update and I know she will also do more later.

I can report that Zoe is back in her room and as she said "je suis une femme"

:)

Isabell

Thanks Isabell, you are a kind, sweet, selfless soul!
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V M

Congrats Zoe  :icon_bunch: 

You totally rock Isabell  8)

Hugs
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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ZoeM

She does indeed.

If you're a praying sort please keep my roommate Erika in your prayers. She's having a much worse time of things than I am, I'm afraid.
Don't lose who you are along the path to who you want to be.








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Beth Andrea

One suggestion to keep the return trip light and quick is to keep one change of clothes (two of undies/socks) and give the rest to the girls still there (or to staff to help others who might need them)

Hey, that's one less bag to pack and carry..best of luck to you, make friends among the women there, too.

*hugs*
...I think for most of us it is a futile effort to try and put this genie back in the bottle once she has tasted freedom...

--read in a Tessa James post 1/16/2017
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