I gained a daughter

[Zane]

You're daughter is so lucky to have you. 

[luna nyan]

Wow.

Kudos to you, your love and understanding is an inspiration.  Please don't forget to look after yourself as well - as others have mentioned, there is support out there for you.  Don't blame yourself, she is who she is, it will be important to remember that when the rough patches happen.

As your daughter is headed into puberty, batten down the hatches, it can be a wild ride as she finds herself and her place in the world, trans issues notwithstanding - don't forget to pick your battles.  Often I feel we as parents hope for the best in the teen years, that some of the values we've tried to impart will stick.

*sending you a long distance hug*

[Blue Rabbit]

This girl is sooooooooooooo lucky to have you. Insanely.

But I'd just like to mention something that bugged me and bugs me when people say this. Completely my opinion, don't know how other people feel about this but just think it's worth thinking about.

You "gained a daughter"? As a trans person my self when people say that about me and so on, I feel terrible. It implies that the old me died......... You've not gained a daughter, she is and has always been a daughter. She is what she is.

[bunnymom]

Hi Magic Dad.
I'm Mom to an older trans* girl. She came out to me last year just after turning 19. I was raised by a single Dad, myself. I am proud to be a non-binary woman. Yes, I am a cis-female, but I grew up in a mostly male socialization. That being said, I hated dresses, eventually wore my hair proper short, but always knew I was a 'girl'. That should have made it easier for me when my child informed me we had been doing it wrong for so long.
I cried to lose my son. I cried because we didn't know sooner. I truly wish she could have understood sooner so the transition would have been more seamless,  without the testosterone playing havoc.
You have this opportunity.  She's still young and on her way with an amazing Dad who cares enough to come hete and find out more about this journey.  I understand the sense of loss of your dreams and possible negation of your efforts to make your child a successful man. She now has an advantage of having a parent that can show her that gender identity is not a measure of anything. Your head may swim, but she's been coping with this for a while.
I believe eventually you will learn your child hasn't gone anywhere.  Your preconceived notions are what go out the window.  Yeah, I believed I had done something wrong along the way. But this is about your child and her path to success.  You're doing it well and lovingly.
I know you will cherish your child no matter what path she walks. You've come a long way and are an awesome Dad to be supporting her.
Please, keep coming back.

Ps: our little family had a wonderful holiday in London last year. My husband marveled at a sign on a bus that said "Some guys wear dresses, get over it". It looked to us like more folks "get it" there than here. Wishing you well.