I'm afraid of being an Alcoholic... :(

[Jo-is-amazing]

So I just went to an 18th (the legal drinking age in Australia), and I can't help but feel I am a significant risk of becoming an alcoholic. As a trans* girl, a person with alcoholism in her blood and a love of drinking (and being drunk), I am scared that I will end up being nothing more than a hopeless drunk. I just make a fool out of myself at parties (at least so I think), and it just makes me feel awful, like I shouldn't be go to social gatherings at all... It just makes me want to burst into tears..... I don't drink often, but when I do, I can't stop myself...  has anyone got any advice on how to control oneself when they start drinking? because I really don't like people staring at me judgementally for an entire night

[Jess42]

So I just went to an 18th (the legal drinking age in Australia), and I can't help but feel I am a significant risk of becoming an alcoholic. As a trans* girl, a person with alcoholism in her blood and a love of drinking (and being drunk), I am scared that I will end up being nothing more than a hopeless drunk. I just make a fool out of myself at parties (at least so I think), and it just makes me feel awful, like I shouldn't be go to social gatherings at all... It just makes me want to burst into tears..... I don't drink often, but when I do, I can't stop myself...  has anyone got any advice on how to control oneself when they start drinking? because I really don't like people staring at me judgementally for an entire night

Yeah, self control Jo. I drink. I drink for a good time. I catch a buzz or a little more and then slow down to maintain that feeling. I have definately been on the same page as you and wouldn't stop in time and be totally inebriated. It really takes self control but I did it and you can do it. You just have to know when to slow down and maintain a feeling without getting totally out of it. But if alcoholism runs in your family or you are prone to and just can't stop in time. It really is time to leave it alone.

Me personally, I hate being drunk and a little word of advise is that if you can't drink without getting drunk, don't drink at all. Like I said, I battled with it and used to get just totally out of it. Yeah, alcoholism runs in my family but I broke the cycle. That is no way to live or enjoy socialization with other people. Now I catch a buzz, maintain that buzz and enjoy it. Leave the hard liquor alone and stick with beer. 1 12 oz beer takes one hour to get out of your system. It is way easier to overdirnk with mixed drinks and other hard liquors. Ya'll have Real Foster's over there and that would be all I would drink anyway.

But at 18, what I am saying is probably going in one ear and out the other. I know I was young one time too. But it is all about self control. But seriously though, if you can't control it don't drink. Just be yourself and try to have a good time anyway. One way to have self control is to remember how you don't want people staring judgementally all night.

[Vicky]

Jo -- I am Vicky and I am an Alcoholic!!  I have over 5.5 years of recovery and sobriety that enabled me to face my GD issues and a group of others as well.  You sound like you very quickly have your alcohol take over control of your life, and that is a sign that you cannot and should not drink at all.  Admitting that is actually the same as the first step in Alcoholics Anonymous, and I would like to suggest you look up a local meeting of AA and go to it.  You will find a lot of people there who, while doing serious work to make their lives livable, also can have a lot of sober fun.  With all the problems that alcohol has caused in our lives (near death for me) we can be a pretty lively and fun loving group.  Sober dances, even movies or darn near anything the members can dream up can be there.  Best of all are the people themselves who admit that they are different from other people since we cannot function with alcohol in our systems, and our further difference as Trans* is just icing on the cake.  There is nothing wrong, and a lot to be PROUD of if you admit that alcohol is not your friend and it can never be.  I am not slow to tell others "I am an Alcoholic" who can have fun and be joyous and free about it.  No brag, just the facts!!

[Adam (birkin)]

I try to drink very sparingly for the same reasons - I'm a person who gets too comfortable with "comforts", and I have a family history of alcoholism. No one really seems to bother me about it, I just say that I prefer not to drink.

[GnomeKid]

I've had a few mild addictions over the years.  Some legal, some illegal (nothing really all that serious).  For some of them after a while I can come back for tastes and be over it again by the end of the experience (or the next morning).  For some of them I just need to stay away or it becomes a habit until I can shake it again.  At this point its usually only like a few days to a week because the process of "unhooking" myself begins pretty quickly.  ALL of them required a distinct period of total abstinence. 

Only way to really know if you're an alcoholic is to stop drinking.  Can you?  After a month or so can you go to a party and only have 1 or 2 drinks?  Can you buy a bottle and let it sit in your fridge open for a week before pouring yourself another?  or are you going to finish it off at a regular pace and then get another?

for me right now its sugar.  (they just keep stepping down in severity as one addiction yields to another =p)  I know I CANNOT have only one cookie.  I'll eat the pack, so I'm avoiding them all together.  Maybe in a month or so I'll be able to see if I can have one without waking up in the middle of the night craving (and then proceeding to eat) 10 more. 

[Misato]

At one point in my life I found myself drinking when I didn't want to. Usually I did my drinking alone to boot. Yet, I had a very hard time admitting to myself I have a problem with alcohol. I preferred to make up justifications and pretend I didn't have a problem.

If you're nervous that you might have a problem too, indeed, the best thing is to just stay away from the bottle.

[janetcgtv]

Jo:

Please do not become alcoholic for your own sake. A friend of mine(age 30 at death) died from being an alcoholic another one (29) drinks so much that she has lost her terrific looks. I would once a year,because our company had free boose at Christmas parties and I would have 8 Harvey Wallbangers. One moment I was sitting in a chair, the next on the floor. Then I said to myself no more of this. if you want to go to bars drink a soft drink (Just don't care what others may think). Your friends who would value your life would understand your decision. Only you can prevent your self from going on a downward spiral. Another friend was on the drugs and she kicked her habit out of her life. It CAN be done.  Please get any and all help that you need as soon as possible.

[Felix]

Maybe you could avoid parties, or bring non-alcoholic beer with you when you go? There are also a lot of recipes on the web for various mocktails and interesting foods. You can nerd out on anything, and if you like what you are doing and think it is cool, others will recognize it as part of who you are. You don't have to drink if you think you can't be safe about it, and it doesn't have to be a big deal.

When I was 18 I was nursing a baby and didn't touch alcohol. I mostly missed coffee. I used to brew it and just hold the cup and smell it. Perhaps you can find similar ways to satisfy whatever it is you feel like you need from alcohol. Your body is infinitely trickable if you work at it.

Please be careful.