6 Weeks into my Transition

[GingerMaxim]

It's only been 6 weeks into my Transition and really have not noticed ANY changes.

Sure my hair and skin is softer, and for the odd nipple soreness, I have NOT noticed a
single change.

But my girlfriend that I have been dating for over 1.5 years, well before my start of my HRT is really
making me uncomfortable.

As a male I had, and have defined muscular man pecs (chest). Just the other day I had my shirt off as I prefer to be naked 24/7 in my own place and she is ok with that, but this time since she knows everything about my HRT and transition, she made a stupid comment that, OH my you have boobs. She says.

This made me feel very uncomfortable. No, I have no change in my pecs at all, they are still very firm like muscular man pecs with no softness of real breasts.

I'm not sure what to think or do? I am not going to have my shirt off around her any more.

Would appreciate some of your tips and comments.

Ginger...

[zog]

These things take time. It's normal not to see anything major in 6 weeks, but since your nipples are sore and your skin is softer, the hormones are working and doing their thing. You just need to let it happen in its own pace.

[GingerMaxim]

I think your getting the wrong idea of my message and I think I am not explaining my self properly.

What I am meaning is that she is how do i say this. Getting uncomfortable with my transition even though there
are NO changes.

Yup I dont know how to explain what I am trying to say.

[GingerMaxim]

Moderator can you delete my thread. I cannot explain my self properly.

[mrs izzy]

Ginger,

Your message is coming through loud and clear for me.

There seems to be a lot of snide remarks from out partners through the process.

It comes from the fact they are trying to force us to accept there perception of how they see us.

They are trying so hard to hold onto there MAN.

Will it get better, hmmm could but be ready for other off the cuff remarks as you progress further.

It truly wish you the best. Make sure you talk these things out with your therapist.

Acceptance is a double edge sword. Its hard to keep a balance and most the time when we fall we feel hurt.

Isabell

[AnnaCannibal]

No, I understand exactly what you are saying.  I don't have a SO, but when I visit my father he now says, "Hey MAN. Hey buddy." As well as constantly interjecting son, he, and other masculine pronouns whenever he can.  Before he would never do this!   He would just call me by my name, which can be gender neutral.  He is accepting of my transition yet is using those pronouns more than ever now! 

It feels uncomfortable telling someone, "Please don't call me that," but its really the only way they'll kmow how you feel.  Give them some slack, but if it persists down the road and you can tell they're doing it on purpose....well, you have to make a decision.

[GingerMaxim]

Part of the problem from her end, is she is very naive. She doesn't seem to know anything of the LGBT world.
I try and explain things to her but everything goes in one ear and out the other. And that is the same with anything I talk to her about.

I give her several different ways of looking at what I am trying to explain. I am fairly patient with her. But over time it's becoming
more of a burden.  So far she has know about my feelings for 6 months ever since I really understood it myself. I have kept her in the loop
as much as I can, but she is unable to understand lots of things I talk to her about.

It hurt that she talks this way to me. I asked her what she would do if I did get real breasts and she doesn't know. But that comment "I don't know" is what she uses for every discussion we have about anything.

She has had some tough times in her life with losing her dad recently and depression and abuse from her xhusband. I have suggested getting good long term counceling. But she is the type that puts everything off until it's too late. She also has very low self esteem... I think caused from her xhusband beating her down with verbal abuse and still does to this day.

I have tried to help her but she refuses to do ANYTHING do to it being to hard. Change is very hard. But it seems she would rather suffer...

Thanks for chatting...

[GingerMaxim]

Yes i have been thinking that one day I will have to make a hard decision. Since i don't have any friends it will be even harder. So far she is willing to stand by me to a point i think.

What will happen in say 6 months or a year after my body really changes. Oh My!!!!