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Confused about my name

Started by Chic, July 14, 2014, 10:18:55 PM

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Chic

I was born with a unisex name. Dylan. Yet a LOT of people say it's a boy's name and better for a boy, the overwhelming majority say this. People actually get ANGRY at parents who name their daughters Dylan. It makes me angry to see that, in fact.

Why does this have to be confusing? I don't want to change my name because I love the name Dylan but everyone makes me feel so insecure about being a girl named Dylan. People tell me to change it before I transition to female.

Will this disrupt me passing at all? Do you think it's a pretty girl's name? Should I just say 'screw it' and embrace my name as a female's name?
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Handy

In a similar situation myself; I like my name (Andy) and frankly it's pretty gender neutral (or at least, that's been my impression).

I could just change the 'y' to an 'i' and Andi would do the job just fine. I don't know if there is a similar equivalent quick-fix, easy solution for Dylan, but just for the record I've known FAABs named Dylan (same spelling and all) and it seems to me a perfectly lovely name, so follow your heart!
On HRT 2 years - Full time 1/7/14
EE-Comp Engineering Student and Cartoon Lover
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Randi

The social security web site can give information on the relative popularity of a name for male or female births for any given year.

http://www.ssa.gov/OACT/babynames/

Female Dylans were very scarce until 2001 or so.

I find it interesting to track the trends in names over the years.  Many formerly male names are now considered female.  http://www.disneybaby.com/blog/25-names-that-used-to-be-boy-names/












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Emmaline

I think it's lovely.

I am actually thinking of going with Delaney for mine- which is technically unisex but heavily skewed towards females.
Body... meet brain.  Now follow her lead and there will be no more trouble, you dig?



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alexis.j

if you are happy with your name, thats great for you. It is only a problem if you want it to be!!!
There are many gg's with male names too...
Me on the other hand, I hate my male name, and cannot wait to change it. (even though it is g
unisex, with a silght modification) I never liked my name and hate being called by it.

So, consider yourself lucky to have a name which you are happy with.
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emilyking

I was given Rudy as my birth name.  While it can swing ether way, it's a super rare name.
I just want a plain and simple name.
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Beyond

Quote from: Chic on July 14, 2014, 10:18:55 PMWhy does this have to be confusing? I don't want to change my name because I love the name Dylan but everyone makes me feel so insecure about being a girl named Dylan. People tell me to change it before I transition to female.

There is something to be said for names that are unambiguously male or female.

In this case as simple fix might be going from Dylan to Diane.

Just an idea.
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Hikari

You could also move the name, but still go by it. Like Elizabeth Dylan Surname. Then at least on all official stuff, there would be no question, and you could still go by your middle name if you want, plenty of people do.
15 years on Susans, where has all the time gone?
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AnnaCannibal

Quote from: Emily King on July 15, 2014, 02:35:05 AM
I was given Rudy as my birth name.  While it can swing ether way, it's a super rare name.
I just want a plain and simple name.

When I think of Rudy, I think of Rudy Roughknight from the Wild ARMS game.  Ugh...such a good game. 

For myself, I couldn't decide between Anna and Asa.  So I went with Asa and kept Anna Cannibal as my bands name.  Seems to be pleasantly working.  I could have gone with my birth name, but in my selfish desire to have a unique name I chose something else.
Is it progression if a cannibal uses a fork?
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Emmaline

Body... meet brain.  Now follow her lead and there will be no more trouble, you dig?



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Nisky

I actually really like the name Dylan...... I wrote a small story a couple of years ago and named the female character Dylan....... So yeah, personally id keep it if you love it so much :)
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katiej

Names are tough these days...especially younger kids names.  My wife and I have a very difficult correctly gendering my kids' classmates when they talk about them.  More often than we get it wrong.  For instance: Rylan is a boy, and Presley and Payton are girls.  Go figure!

So by the time this young generation grows up, nobody will think twice about a woman named Dylan.  Heck, a friend of mine named her daughter Noah.  NOAH!!   ??? ???
"Before I do anything I ask myself would an idiot do that? And if the answer is yes, I do not do that thing." --Dwight Schrute
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androgynouspainter26

Don't choose your name out of fear!  A name is something that will define you for the rest of your life, so you need to choose something that you feel very secure about, independent of any issues regarding gender or anything else you may face.
My gender problem isn't half as bad as society's.  Although mine is still pretty bad.
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Brenda E

If you like the name, keep it.  I'm planning on keeping my male name and it's an obviously male name, but I think it makes a beautiful, unique female name too.

I guess it also depends what your end goal is.  If you're going for stealth, then perhaps an unequivocally-female name is a better option, just so that it's one less thing that might give you away.  If, like me, you're gonna be obviously trans, then there's absolutely no reason you can't stick with whatever name you choose: it's hardly the weirdest thing about our genders...
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Emmaline

Body... meet brain.  Now follow her lead and there will be no more trouble, you dig?



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Suziack

Quote from: androgynouspainter26 on July 16, 2014, 10:43:46 PM
Don't choose your name out of fear!  A name is something that will define you for the rest of your life, so you need to choose something that you feel very secure about, independent of any issues regarding gender or anything else you may face.

I like that! Yes, choosing a name can be very tough. To me, Dylan sounds plenty feminine, and I see nothing wrong with it. I always hated my own name from my youth, and although I very much liked many certain names, they never ever seemed to apply to 'me.' In fact it's been a long past-time of mine to either take note of, or invent, names that I liked. Recently, a name came to me out of the blue, and it just seems to resonate with me. I've kept it for a while, and a middle name has come along to match it. I don't think they are especially creative or interesting. And they don't seem to be names that I've picked, just names that resonate with me, and that's what really matters. Besides, the first name is somewhat unique.

If you decide to go against your own opinion and not to use Dylan, take your time in choosing a name that you are very comfortable with, for it will be well, well worth it. Ask anyone who has done so.

If you torture the truth long enough, it'll confess to anything.
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Suziack

Maybe we should have a little naming contest for Dylan, and decide for her. The one that gets the most votes is the one that Dylan is stuck with ;) . I personally kinda like the name Presley, but I think Paisly sounds more girlish. What does everyone else think?
If you torture the truth long enough, it'll confess to anything.
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stephaniec

my name is the same except for ie
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HeatherR

Hard to say, I think Dylan is a great name for a girl...  It would, however, possibly out you to people you'd otherwise pass, simply by triggering a question in their minds, even if for just a fraction of a second.  I personally wanted to go with a common name for my age group, so as to reduce those kinds of moments.
The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.  ~Ralph Blum~



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Cris Zoe

I like Dylan too, it could easily be a girls name. Me I'm keeping my first name (Cris) as it's considered mostly feminine but changing my middle name from David to Zoé. Paperwork's done, stand in front of a judge in a month.
- Cris Zoé
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