Glad to read that things are going well for you Jenna
You may not be able to reply to (or send) PM's until you have made 15 or more posts on the forum.
I would echo what others have said about transition being a marathon, not a sprint (thanks Catherine
). The changes from HRT are very gradual and happen over months & years, not days & weeks. Puberty spans years for most people. We are basically inducing a second puberty when we take HRT. It doesn't take any less time the second time around.
I started quite a bit older than you - I was 43. I am 45 now. FWIW, here is my experience over the past 15 months:
Finasteride quelled the seemingly incessant involunary erections. I started Estradiol & (low dose - my blood pressure has always been at the low end of normal) Spironolactone 7 weeks later (& stopped Finasteride). E removed my obsession & compulsion to dress after 2 days. The desire has remained, but it is nice to be rid of the obsession about it.
Spiro changed some things down below a bit too fast for me, so I stopped after 7 weeks. I was not prepared to feel such obvious shrinkage. After 5 weeks of only taking E, I realised that I had been on anti-androgens for a reason (ie: to shut down the non-stop libido), and restarted an even lower dose of Spiro with a low dose of Finasteride. While I made the decisions myself, I did consult with my prescribing physician each time I wanted to make a change, and always made sure I never took more than the prescribed dose at any time. At some point while I was trying to find what worked best for me, I started to take the E sublingually & have done so since.
I still felt there was something missing by the end of 2013, and wanted to start on Micronized Progesterone. This took a few discussions with my HRT physician since he was concerned that Progesterone might worsen the depression I had suffered from for about 30 years. As it happened, my depression took a bad turn for the worse in January 2014, very shortly after my Prometrium prescription had been sent off to the (mail-order) pharmacy. I had two episodes where I felt very suicidal. I white-knuckled through the first, and received some powerful help from a couple of trans friends on a TG chat room to help me through the second.
The Prometrium arrived near the end of January, and, after making sure my wife was watching me very closely, I started taking the capsules as prescribed. 5 days later, the fog of depression left me (it felt as if the fog was completely gone, instead of just lifted a bit - which is all that anti-depressants had ever given me). That was a little over 6 months ago. I have not suffered from depression since.
I have been taking the same dosage of E since June 2013. I am back taking the (low) dose of Spiro that I was initially prescribed in June 2013. I am taking Finasteride as prescribed (sometimes less). I am taking Micronized Progesterone as prescribed; although I have stopped taking Prometrium a couple of times for a few days to see if I would feel different when I restarted. Each time I have felt growth pains in my breasts for a week or two after restarting. I cannot tell if this translated into actual breast growth.
It is now 15 months since I started taking Finasteride, 14 months since I started E & Spiro, and 6.5 months since I started Prometrium.
My body hair pattern is definitely female, with significant reduction in body hair in many places (ie: chest & arms, not much less on my legs). I even had a small reduction in beard growth (half the growth rate, & almost no hair on my cheeks). My hairline has moved forward by about 1 inch (my hair had not receded very far to begin with). My underarms no longer stink if I forget deodorant.
I have between 38C & 36C breasts, and a feminine fat distribution. My hips are slightly wider, and when I gain some weight in my belly, the weight is below my belly button rather than above it. Note that I said "feminine" fat distribution, not "supermodel" fat distribution.
My height has dropped by 0.5 inch (I am no longer 0.5 inch taller than my wife). Within the past 2-3 months I have noticed some significant loss of upper body strength.
My libido disappeared completely for several months, but has since returned as something very different. What I have now is much more manageable for me, & responds to quite different stimuli. My sexual orientation has not changed - I am still attracted to women.
My wife & several of my friends have commented many times about how much easier I am to get along with now. I do not become angry nearly as often. I seek & find compromise much faster than before I started HRT. My marriage has been remaining strong, even though my wife is definitely not a lesbian. She is
not happy about any of the physical changes. And yet, because my emotional & mental improvements from HRT have been so obvious, she would much rather have me as I am now compared to the person I was before. She still sees me as her husband, not her wife, but we have been finding ways to make our marriage work through mutual care for & understanding of one another. Being on HRT has given me a better ability to be considerate of others and a better realisation of which are the times when I need to compromise. This has significantly improved my work performance. I am much more content within myself. I feel comfortable being me.
All these changes from HRT are gradual. I tend to notice them in retrospect, often not until they are pointed out to me.
The single biggest thing I have done that has made the most difference to how I feel has been to get laser hair removal on my face. Suddenly seeing no 5 o'clock shadow when I look at my reflection has made a world of difference to how I see myself. For me, that was the first time I felt that I might ever actually be able to find the courage to present as female in public.
That was a bit longer than I expected. Feel free to ask me any questions you wish. You may need to do so here rather than via PM until you have 15 or more posts.
Be well,
Tessa
Quote from: Jenna_ on August 11, 2014, 03:00:37 AMHey thanks for the replies everyone.
I've been feeling allot better about my transition lately. Its taken some realizations that i've had some unrealistic expectations what the hormones will do for me and at what stage. I think i'm settling into it now and have actually noticed some initial breast growth at 2 months which is making me much happier.
Some people have sent me PM's and i cant figure out how to reply. I'm sorry this site is confusing, i don't want to be rude but i simply cant find the reply button *crazy* and really sorry.
