So as far as I can think back Ive never been to in to gender Ive allways known I did not fit in with the rest of crowd. I grew up as a tomboy I allwas dressed in guy clothes and i was allwas doing some thing with my hair may it be cutting it all off so im bald or growing it out past my ass and dieing it every color under the sun ( some would say my drastic hair changes are due to my mental issues)
Ive allwas been a bit androgynous in some aspect. I get a lot of is that a boy or is that a girl growing up. Now this used to bug me a hell of a lot because I was a girl I was born with girl parts so I had to be a girl right?
( before i go on here let me point out I was raised with a very open family very accepting) Well I was just really uncomfortable in my skin. I thought my issue was perhaps Im lez I for most of my life i knew I liked women well I lied I fell in like with people for who they where not what parts they had but I thought i was gay I figured it made sense. After a while i realized that was not my problem so I went to the one place I knew might have answers THE INTERNET!!!!!! there where times where I kept trying to fix my slef thinking well if i just try and be girly ill get out of this slump but I tried and tried with no break to the hell I felt. But after doing a lot of research and soul searching I discovered I am transgender well more gender less I am now very comfortable with the fact I am am a pansexual male who enjoys looking fem from time to time in a females body there are days where i still struggle because I don't look the way i wish i could but i I have learned I look pretty damn good all dolled up and im sexy as hell as a male so far its working wonders for me tho I can't tell many people and a lot of people don't understand why I am this way and I really wish I had more people to talk about who was more accepting. My dom tries but I don't think he really gets it sadly and even tho I have my family they are under enough stress with my mental issues and I well not put then thro that. So im kinda floating out here all by my self it gets very lonley here in my world
