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Hiding Purses

Started by SilentRain, August 16, 2014, 06:58:44 AM

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AnneB

Quote from: Foxglove on August 18, 2014, 03:14:47 PM
One of the great days in your on-going process is when you get up the courage to just go into a shop and buy what you want.

You get to the point where you simply don't care what anybody else thinks.  I'd say about the only thing I couldn't get up the courage to buy when I was in guy-mode was a bra.

^^ this!!!    I first started a slow, disinterested stroll thru Goodwill, up and down -every- aisle, occasionally picking at one thing or another, like I was waiting for someone else to finish shopping.. I'd stop in the women's tops, short or long sleeve aisles, pick something out, and half-look at it.. put it back.. like I was a guy just thinking ""gawd I wish she would hurry so we can leave"..  glancing around to see if I was being watched.. you know.. no one was looking.
I picked a pair of girls jeans, and went right to the fitting rooms and tried them on, as, at that point, yeah I was nervous, and crazy scared, but if I didn't try it, I never would.   That was December.. now I walk right in, head for the tops, or jeans section and look at them like I'm on a mission! 

Clothes are one thing..  SHOES, are def another!  There is just no hiding looking at, picking, trying on shoes.. I'm a boot girl..  no slip-ons or slingbacks fer me.. I've got like.. 6 pairs of calf boots, one kneehigh, and I'm looking now for ankle boots.  I wear my girl jeans when I go, so there is some sense of "hmmmm, girl, maybe?"  who cares..   funniest moment, I was looking at some heels and a 70-something yr old woman was next to me.. I had a pair in hand already and just glanced over at her, she smiled, really warmly, genuine.. no glare, no uh-uh looks.. At this point.. I don't care anymore.

You will get to that point too, even being younger, and no credit cards yet.. getting prepaid cards.. best idea.  Shipping it?  Ask a girl friend if you can have it sent to her house.  If you're not out to her yet, say its for Moms b-day and you don't want it shipped home, as she'd see it. 

Maybe, one thing to suggest, and it might be for another thread.. do you have a really good girl friend, one that you could share with?  Let her into your circle, into your life, let her know what's going on with you, you might very well find an excellent friend, mentor, tutor (makeup, clothes), sister.  If she is a true friend, she'll want to help you!  I've let a bunch of girl friends into my circle now, and many want to take me shopping, teach me makeup and fashion.  I wasn't expecting the support I have received, but am overwhelmed at the capacity they have to just accept me, and want to help me open up, and grow.

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mac1

I would really like to be able to carry a purse but it is not acceptable for men or anybody appearing to be a man to do.
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mrs izzy

messenger bags

all styles that are female but can cross for men's messenger bag.

just saying.
Mrs. Izzy
Trans lifeline US 877-565-8860 CAD 877-330-6366 http://www.translifeline.org/
"Those who matter will never judge, this is my given path to walk in life and you have no right to judge"

I used to be grounded but now I can fly.
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Tessa James

Depending on your local culture, I agree that we are moving toward greater androgyny in style with plenty of straight guys carrying a bag.  it is simply a practical device and makes sense.  OMG i had such trembling fears when I fist went shopping and literally held hands with my wife or helpful friends.  It quickly changed as I saw what others have noted to be mostly indifference to my presentation.  The truth is most people don't care about us and how we look, it's our own insecurities working against us.  If we focus on fear it will grow.  A smile and nurtured sense of confidence do wonders.
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013
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