Gender awkwardness

[Rayne]

I have noticed that i cannot use the right pronouns on myself or refer to myself as a girl without feeling awkward  or presumpuous. (i cant be spelling that right o.0) but at the same time when i think logically i find it harder and harder to deny feeling like a girl inside. Anyone else feel like this? How can i get over it. I am not even using the pronouns out load, or references.

[chibiStephy]

when I stated with my transition, I had the same issue, sometimes I used the Male pronoun to refer to myself  even on my head, but then time pass and I just get used to use the female one, but what really matters is how you feel on the inside, the rest of things will be just a matter of time, don't panic. 

[Valleyrie]

I do this too at times but with my name. It's probably because you're just so used to referring to yourself as a guy which is understandable but that doesn't mean you're any less of a girl. Just keep trying and it should eventually become natural for you!

[suzifrommd]

I have noticed that i cannot use the right pronouns on myself or refer to myself as a girl without feeling awkward  or presumpuous. (i cant be spelling that right o.0) but at the same time when i think logically i find it harder and harder to deny feeling like a girl inside. Anyone else feel like this? How can i get over it. I am not even using the pronouns out load, or references.

This is EXACTLY me.

I've been happily full-time as a woman for over a year and I still feel awkward referring to myself as female. No one else in my life does. They're all comfortable using "she" and "her" for me, but it still doesn't sound right to me.

It's gotten a little less awkward as time goes on, but I've learned to live with the awkwardness.

You're definitely not alone.

[Rayne]

Well it feels great for me to be refered to as a girl. I frequently even feel a memtal flinch when refered to as a boy. But when i try to think something like -maybe thats a guy thing- it almost feels presumptuous. Anyway i am glad i am not alone there.  What i do sometimes when i feel bad, deppressed, or like that is to think about Li.  I think  -i am Li s girl and he loves me.- awkward to say here, but it helps. Far from object-ifying myself, it helps to think of someone who loves and supports you. (the - is there to help make my use of it clear, as it has other meanings.)

[Cin]

I have noticed that i cannot use the right pronouns on myself or refer to myself as a girl without feeling awkward  or presumpuous. (i cant be spelling that right o.0) but at the same time when i think logically i find it harder and harder to deny feeling like a girl inside. Anyone else feel like this? How can i get over it. I am not even using the pronouns out load, or references.

It depends on how I look and feel. Sometimes, I go days without shaving or grooming myself (My depression sometimes confines me to bed) and when someone refers to me as a girl, it feels weird, because I would feel awkward if I were standing right in front of them, sure they'll call you whatever you want, but they won't really mean it if you're not really trying to present yourself as a female. Even with the anonymity of the internet, I still feel like I'm fooling myself. I have to feel right.

I think I have two layers, deep inside, I don't feel either male or female. The layer above that is female or whatever....  sometimes, I feel good about my outermost shell, and then I'm sort of OK with female pronouns.

When I'm really anxious, I sometimes say "Calm down dude!" to myself, and sometimes "Good girl" when I succeed at something, I can't help it. Just admitting to this on here is pretty embarrassing.

I don't like any pronouns, to be honest. I'm just a person. but having no pronouns is impractical.