If I hide who I am, it feels like I am just swapping one closet for another.
I am out as trans, despite still presenting male, in NA in NE Philly, at my Quaker meeting, and to most of my friends here in Philly. Not so much in my neighbourhood - no-one has asked & I have not made a point of being obvious about it.
Only a few people at work know. The subject has arisen in conversation a couple of times, and I have responded by outing myself. I also needed to tell my supervisor & manager due to room-sharing concerns on a business trip. I feel that I have represented myself well by continuing to work after the disclosure as I had been before. I am not being a distraction to others, &, other than that one concern, I have not requested or expected any special treatment.
Back home, my parents are still trying (with very limited success) to come to terms with my disclosure to them. They have requested that I not tell anyone else back in Ireland. Since I do care about them (a lot), I am giving them that space which they do seem to need.
I feel it is important for me to be as open as I can about being trans. If attitudes to trans folk are to change, that must start with some trans folk becoming visible as responsible members of their communities.
Maybe I am not a good ambassador since my gender presentation is not what people expect. But then again, by being me, I am showing that being trans does not necessarily mean conforming to a stereotype.
The bottom line for me: If we hide, then we remain invisible. When we are invisible, no-one can see us when decisions that affect us are being made. When we are invisible, it is easier for others to only see the Jerry Springer stereotypes whenever trans issues are mentioned.
Just my tuppenny-worth. For now. Since I am still learning how to be me, these opinions are subject to change.
Tessa