what was the sensation the very first time you cross dressed

[stephaniec]

The first time at around 4  I remember it being quite euphoric   .  I remember how pretty  the clothes were and how perfectly normal I felt. I don't really feel any difference between then  and now many years latter. I just know that for some reason I always wanted to wear those clothes.

[alabamagirl]

One of my friends dared me to walk through my neighbourhood to the local park in a girls' top and wig. Never one to care what society thinks, I put them on and set out. I thought I'd feel nervous, but oddly, it was the least self-conscious I had felt in... I don't know. Maybe ever. I didn't pass at all, nor was I trying to, but just wearing something clearly feminine and having long hair (another first for me), made me feel... Almost giddy, really.

That was a few years ago.

[BrennaSage]

i can add to this one

when i was around 12 and was first allowed to be left home alone, i started sneaking into my sister's closet ... it was euphoric, and also somewhat arousing (i was starting puberty at this age). I was also really confused by it ... I didn't understand why I felt the desire to wear girls' clothes.

starting when i was 13, i would stay up late at night playing with makeup after everyone was asleep ... it felt nice to wear, but looking in the mirror just made me feel like "welp ... this sucks ..."

The first time in public was at church camp when i was maybe 15 ... I was hanging out with this girl, and we decided it would be fun to switch clothes ... the look on the pastor's face when he saw us made me feel soooo ashamed!

[Rose City Rose]

The first time I seriously tried in earnest to look female in private, with my fiance looking, I felt relief.

[BeingSonia]

Until I was around 5, my mom used me time to time as a 'model' when she was making dresses for her friend's daughter (born a couple of days before me).
I remember it felt natural.
It's maybe how everything started...

[Asniceasme]

For me...it just felt comfortable, it felt right, it felt like what I should be wearing.

[stephaniec]

yea, that feeling of being so right just stayed in my mind

[Hideyoshi]

I felt horny.

I no longer feel that way when I wear female clothes since starting HRT.

[Jess42]

yea, that feeling of being so right just stayed in my mind

Yeah, I remember having to wear my cousin's panties when all my underwear were in the laundry. It just felt right and normal. I got to where I would throw clean underwear in the dirty clothes just to feel normal.

[stephaniec]

I felt horny.

I no longer feel that way when I wear female clothes since starting HRT.

I started quite early so I didn't feel horny, but when I hit puberty all hell broke loose.

[Jess42]

I started quite early so I didn't feel horny, but when I hit puberty all hell broke loose.

The excitement never bit me. Even during puberty when the hormones run all over the place. maybe I'm just weird or abnormal. Or just that screwed up.

[stephaniec]

The excitement never bit me. Even during puberty when the hormones run all over the place. maybe I'm just weird or abnormal. Or just that screwed up.

I don't know, dysphoria is a curious creature

[Jess42]

I don't know, dysphoria is a curious creature

Yeah it is. To me it was nothing more than feeling normal and comfortable. Clothing never ever has done anything other than make me feel natural. But my God, I never got all the "little soldier standing at attention" all the other boys got either during those certain ages. Like I said, I may just be weird or something not quite right.

[alabamagirl]

I wasn't counting underwear in my initial reply to this topic. I was wearing panties long before, but I can't remember what that felt like the first time. I might have felt aroused then. My first pair were rather sexy (in my opinion. They weren't the kind that were designed to be sexy, but they appealed to me.)

[stephaniec]

Yeah it is. To me it was nothing more than feeling normal and comfortable. Clothing never ever has done anything other than make me feel natural. But my God, I never got all the "little soldier standing at attention" all the other boys got either during those certain ages. Like I said, I may just be weird or something not quite right.

well puberty was hell, but before and after just like finding a comfortable chair

[stephaniec]

well puberty was hell, but before and after just like finding a comfortable chair or putting your brain in a non twisted position

[Paeonia]

It just felt right for me when I got my first chance, and I have chased that feeling since.

I have a somewhat love hate relationship with crossdressing though, it feels right, but only as long as I don't catch a glimpse of myself doing it, then it reminds me of just how much of the journey to womanhood is still left.

[Jess42]

well puberty was hell, but before and after just like finding a comfortable chair

I hear you Stephanie. It was kind of a mixed blessing and curse at the same time. I got quite a name with the girls ironically just because it took so long. The girls would tell the guys and so on. The guys would ask me how. I had their respect even with a short "pencil". I felt like Dr. Freaking Ruth of my high school. It was also kind of awkward, 'cause it ain't big by a long shot and way shorter than other guys. Being a lesbian was my saving grace. A lot of girls actually laughed. How's that for messed up? That is why I said I must be screwed up. The only thing I really got out of puberty was little "A" cups and some pimples. It is still the same size now as it was when I was 11. But now, It ain;t no big thing, no pun intended.

[ImagineKate]

The first time was when I was about 4 1/2. It was mom's pantyhose. It felt absolutely wonderful and liberating until I was caught then I felt extremely embarrassed.

When puberty kicked in though, ugh. He would stand at attention whenever I wore panties. When putting them on, it felt wonderful but when he decided to take over it kicked me back to reality. At one point I almost took a knife to it. I must have been like 11 or 12.

When mom and dad split I would sometimes spend a week or two at her house. She'd often leave me home alone. I didn't mind. I would try on all her stuff. Bras were a problem though as she is a 32C bordering on D. Padding them just didn't feel "right" either.

I was also intrigued and depressed to see my cousins go through puberty. One of them developed breasts really fast and full and she was like a B cup when she was 14. I was secretly envious... my mom would talk about her development too, made me even more jealous.

[stephaniec]

I hear you Stephanie. It was kind of a mixed blessing and curse at the same time. I got quite a name with the girls ironically just because it took so long. The girls would tell the guys and so on. The guys would ask me how. I had their respect even with a short "pencil". I felt like Dr. Freaking Ruth of my high school. It was also kind of awkward, 'cause it ain't big by a long shot and way shorter than other guys. Being a lesbian was my saving grace. A lot of girls actually laughed. How's that for messed up? That is why I said I must be screwed up. The only thing I really got out of puberty was little "A" cups and some pimples. It is still the same size now as it was when I was 11. But now, It ain;t no big thing, no pun intended.

well, mines got quite a bit shorter since HRT