What are you thinking? 9.0

[Shantel]

Malachite I hope you feel better


I am nervous and I feel dumb for that. For a variety of reason I haven't been to Temple in ages. And now I'm going to Rosh Hashannah services... as a guy. No one knows I've transitioned. It's not like a ton of people know me there (that's one of the issues) but the choir does. And on that note I miss choir so much and my voice is in a wicked changing place and my singing sucks right now.

ok, gotta go

Good for you Christopher, your Auntie Shan approves whole heartedly. The voice will come along in time dear!

[Felix]

I'm thinking I wish video games and the internet could always be as fascinating as they are when I'm supposed to be doing something else. I'm not getting enough done, but on wikipedia I learned that unfixed male cats have wider faces than fixed ones. Whee.

I'm also thinking I've been unfair in some of my expectations for my daughter lately. She has a lot of knowledge and seems so competent sometimes that it's hard to remember how much help she needs and be ready for it. I keep forgetting to explain things properly. It sets everyone up for frustration if I just assume relevant details to be common sense. It's weird to go from hearing the latin names of insects rattled off to trying to spell out exactly how to stack books (make sure they're closed, face them in the same direction, etc) though.

[Jill F]

Thinking about the things you would have to hide while deep stealth to a partner in a serious relationship:

- HRT
- Dilation
- How come you never have your period?

OK, I'm not recommending sleeping with a guy without full disclosure, let alone having a serious relationship based on a falsehood, but if I went there:

"I don't have a uterus or ovaries."

[Miss_Bungle1991]

The next person that yanks on my Baloobius is getting poked in the eyes.

[Jill F]

Laura, you just made me think of this birthday card I have ready to go for the next gay guy I know to have one.

It shows one guy going down on the other with his hand over his eye and looking displeased and the other guy embarrassed.  It reads, "It's all fun and games until someone gets their eye poked out with a d*ck.  Happy Birthday!"

[Miss_Bungle1991]

[King Malachite]

Thanks Christopher    I hope I can start to feel better within a couple of days as well.




I'm sick and my mom is nagging me.....ugh!  Payday is this Saturday.  I'm looking forward to it.  I'm also looking forward to my family members paying me the money they owe me.  My sister owes me $120.  My other sister owes me $7.47 and my father owes me $40. 

[Blue Senpai]

I wash two things wrong and my mom starts saying awful things, tells me I don't do anything (apparently washing the dishes, doing laundry, walking the dog and vacuuming counts as nothing) and that I should find a place to volunteer at instead of looking at stupid things (transition-related, this forum, etc.) Sigh, I guess I'm really alone in this journey.

They possibly don't believes that this "stupid thing" is keeping me alive. Not like I got anyone to talk to in the family.

[Shantel]

I wash two things wrong and my mom starts saying awful things, tells me I don't do anything (apparently washing the dishes, doing laundry, walking the dog and vacuuming counts as nothing) and that I should find a place to volunteer at instead of looking at stupid things (transition-related, this forum, etc.) Sigh, I guess I'm really alone in this journey.

They possibly don't believes that this "stupid thing" is keeping me alive. Not like I got anyone to talk to in the family.

It can be a lonely place at home, but we are all your extended family and we are here for you hon!

[Shantel]

Laura, you just made me think of this birthday card I have ready to go for the next gay guy I know to have one.

It shows one guy going down on the other with his hand over his eye and looking displeased and the other guy embarrassed.  It reads, "It's all fun and games until someone gets their eye poked out with a d*ck.  Happy Birthday!"

This made me think of a recent conversation I overheard between two adults. The woman was bragging about how naughty she had been in her youth and the fellow who had grown up with her said, "If all those dicks that were poked in you were reversed you'd look like a porcupine!" I about fell through the floor!

[Edge]

I just realized that I've been worried about a friend liking me instead of not worrying because I'm not entirely sure I like them.
Come to think of it, I usually find that I'm expected to want to impress other people instead of (and in the absence of) other people wanting to impress me. I think I may have internalized this when it comes to people I don't outright dislike.

[Bombadil]

This made me think of a recent conversation I overheard between two adults. The woman was bragging about how naughty she had been in her youth and the fellow who had grown up with her said, "If all those dicks that were poked in you were reversed you'd look like a porcupine!" I about fell through the floor!

I just almost spewed coffee all over the computer screen

[V M]

Sometimes I think that I think "WHAT THE *$#!$#!@%$#%^#%&^&*!!!" a bit more often than I should

[Shantel]

Sometimes I think that I think "WHAT THE *$#!$#!@%$#%^#%&^&*!!!" a bit more often than I should

I think that I say that more than I should and I do get in trouble for it too!

[Liam Erik]

I skipped attending a thing because I didn't think I could handle it, and despite never seriously thinking about going in the first place I've now spent three days sweating about it and feeling like crap, and triggered. 

[immortal gypsy]

The way the past two days at work have been I need a treat. I think I might use my rare Sunday off and find out if it is possible to drain a place of hot chocolate.

Well there goes that idea. Boss dosen't want to work tomorrow so I have to do it, (annoying Penrith game). Sunday rates think of the money girl, just think of the money. Why is transitioning so expensive

[Bombadil]

I am so screwed up. I sort of wish I could have an emergancy session with my therapist. cripes I suck

[Dee Marshall]

Ate a reasonable breakfast, a sandwich consisting of two pieces of bread, one fried egg, one ounce of sirloin, one slice of cheese and some salsa, and was hungry 5 minutes later. This diet, combined with HRT is killing me!

[Edge]

I'm thinking I should be doing my homework.
First food though.

[Adam (birkin)]

It's weird how things in life just sneak up on you. Like hormones, didn't notice anything, nothing, nothing....BAM FACIAL HAIR BAM PASSING. Weight loss...didn't notice nothing, BAM, one day coworkers are complaining that they can see my ass crack and I'm finding that jeans I couldn't even fit a thigh in before are fitting me now.

On that note, fat redistribution makes a whole world of a difference in how I feel about myself. No more self-consciousness about hips after over 10 years of anxiety. Like I have a proper man's ass and I love it.