Did transition change your sexual preference?

[stephaniec]

I've always been bi , but estrogen has added  a new dimension to how I view men.

[Allyda]

Well, interesting question and many interesting responses here so far.

As for me, I was attracted to women both romantically and physically before hrt, and that hasn't changed. I'm still lesbian. What has changed is my openess on what is important in life and in a relationship. By this I mean, I have a need to be loved, and held that I never had before. I've always been a strong woman, hell, I had to be to get through some of the things I've had to endure to get to this point in my evolution physically, sexually, and romantically. I've always had an Alpha Female personality, but I have softened up somewhat since beginning full transition in a way that is hard for me to explain. I guess I could put it this way; I've come to see that if/when true love comes along, sincere true love it won't matter to me if they be male or female, trans or cis, or somewhere in between. Even though I've a strong attraction to girls I'm not above a compromise because it is going to be the person I'm attracted to at that point, and not their gender or their attributes.

Make sense? While I sincerely hope there's a girl out there trans or cis who can love me, however, if they turn out to be a guy I just hope he's not too hairy if he's cis, lol!

Ali

[Michelle G]

I agree. We shouldn't be promoting misandry here, we shouldn't hate on anyone. We are hated a lot for no reason... why would we do the same to other people??

I didn't say I hated them at all   I just should have said "some" men disgust me

btw, I love my transmen friends

[Kimberley Beauregard]

I'm not on hormones but for some reason, my wiring changed and I'm now bisexual.  It was a gradual process what started when I realised I wanted to cross-dress and needed to express my feminine side.  It's not down to suppressed feelings since, besides a short gay phase, I was only sexually interested in women for practically all my life.

I'm totally okay with this.

[Alaia]

The only explanation I can see is effect that the experience of transitioning can have on our sexuality-I feel like transitioning can, in many cases, open our minds to new possibilities.  I don't believe that anyone is exclusively homosexual or heterosexual, and transitioning has made me a lot more aware of just how flexible gender and sexuality are.  I identified as gay (male) before my transition, and now I'm a true-blue bisexual.  This has nothing to do with hormones, at least I don't see it that way.  I simply realized that I didn't have to limit myself, and opened myself up to new possibilities.  Just my subjective experience, but that's how it was for me.

This has very much been the case for me (other than the identifying as gay part). The barriers I had built up that prevented me from accepting myself as a woman were built from the teachings and values of the heteronormative and highly religious society I grew up in. Once those walls came crashing down it not only opened up my mind up to acceptance towards myself and transition, but it also opened up my mind towards other things that I'd never allowed myself to consider before. I now consider myself bisexual, even though I haven't been with a man yet. I am open to it as I believe that so long as they click with me I could be attracted to anyone, regardless of gender.

[Jane's Sweet Refrain]

The only explanation I can see is effect that the experience of transitioning can have on our sexuality-I feel like transitioning can, in many cases, open our minds to new possibilities.  I don't believe that anyone is exclusively homosexual or heterosexual, and transitioning has made me a lot more aware of just how flexible gender and sexuality are.  I identified as gay (male) before my transition, and now I'm a true-blue bisexual.  This has nothing to do with hormones, at least I don't see it that way.  I simply realized that I didn't have to limit myself, and opened myself up to new possibilities.  Just my subjective experience, but that's how it was for me.

If I may offer another explanation. I went from being a straight male (ugh) to being a straight female. I don't believe that it was because I had opened myself up to possibilities that one day 8 months into hrt when a male colleague walked into a meeting, my stomach did a trapeze act. It was a total surprise and a physical response to a male person and body. I also don't believe I was hiding anything from myself. In those eight months, I had essentially gone through a new puberty. It has been well documented that hrt changes the brain, and that it changes the body is pretty obvious. I had new circuitry and a new destination. Could it be that when we go through a new puberty, we shake up the dice and re-roll? Saying this doesn't mean that people don't open up to new possibilities. But it does suggest another idea.

I should mention that, according to this explanation, giving a gay adult male testosterone would have no effect on orientation, since it was probably testosterone that helped make his sexuality more, er, solid (firm? This isn't working) to start with.

BTW, I'm still captivated by beautiful women, but I'm no longer attracted to them physically.

[Violet Bloom]

The barriers I had built up that prevented me from accepting myself as a woman were built from the teachings and values of the heteronormative and highly religious society I grew up in. Once those walls came crashing down it not only opened up my mind up to acceptance towards myself and transition, but it also opened up my mind towards other things that I'd never allowed myself to consider before.

  This reminds me of a phrase I saw on the backpack of a rather 'anti-establishment'-looking young woman today - "->-bleeped-<- THE CISTEM".  Certainly for me everything I'd learned and been conditioned to believe for most of my life did me a great disservice.  I was clueless until the age of 35 that it was possible for me to be a lesbian even though I knew full well what a lesbian was!  The moment I figured it all out for myself felt like getting hit in the head with a mallet, it was such an enormous revelation to me.  It makes me wonder sometimes just how many people suffer their whole lives not having a clue at all what's wrong with them because they've never been offered the necessary information.

[pretty pauline]

Yes it definitely changed mine, Iv posted about it many times here https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,86615.msg617179.html#msg617179  https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,132560.msg1055324.html#msg1055324

It can be a little unnerving experience at first, the thought of being sexual attracted to a guy was ewww, the change was unsettling, but hormones rewired my brain, a gorgeous hunk of a guy with big muscles now gives me butterflies in my stomach, I'm like an excited school girl, I now have absolutely no sexual interest in women, I'm a straight woman attracted to men, I'm now married to a man, if I was told 30 years ago that I would eventually marry a man, I would never have believe it, but I'm now a woman with the right equipment, it just feels right for me to be with a man, I'II never be with another woman sexual, the hormones and my transition changed all that.

[monica93304]

With all the lesbian sisters here that means that there are more men to chose from for me!!!

[Pinkkatie]

Before I started to go on HRT I identified as a gay guy. I'm still sexually interested in men and have no desire to having a sexual relationship with a woman.

[Jaime R D]

It hasn't, I still prefer to avoid it.

[Rachelicious]

Before I started to go on HRT I identified as a gay guy. I'm still sexually interested in men and have no desire to having a sexual relationship with a woman.

Curious. Pre-SRS I found it extremely difficult to carry any relationship with a guy. I was completely aghast of the idea that he might actually be gay and interested in specific physiology (thus seeing me, and our relationship, in a very misgendered way.)

That all got a lot better after SRS, of course

[Tori]

Bisexual polyamory has emerged. Weeeeeeeee...

Used to be exclusive to females.

[LizMarie]

My own "change" to admitting I am bi was more admitting to myself how I felt. As I looked backwards with my therapist, memories came to light. None of that was due to HRT, though given the timing, I might have ascribed it to HRT. However, it was those memories that made me aware that this was something that had always existed and had existed long prior to HRT.

[Megumi]

I was A sexual my entire life due to my gender issues. I had no desire to date anyone because my body didn't match me. Now that I'm on HRT and feeling MUCH better about who I am and the body I have I'm leaning towards guys but there has been one woman who peaks my interest so I'm beginning to wonder if I might be Pansexual now as I am not attracted to her in the sense of that I want to have sex but for the person she is. I have a blind date coming up with a man fairly soon and I'm excited about that couldn't say the same when I was asked to go on blind dates before I started transitioning.

[EchelonHunt]

Pre-T, I thought I was attracted to both female and males. But in actual fact, I was admiring their appearances, not actually falling for them or wanting to have sex with them. I was never interested in sex, never got that raging sexual desire towards another person. Sure, I have dated both women and men but in the end, I cannot fake something I cannot feel.

I did previously think of myself as a gay male and had sexual fantasies surrounding that identity, genuinely became aroused from it but I become equally aroused by the thought of making love to a woman as a man... then other days, I will have sexual fantasies of being a woman having sex with a man or a woman... what the...? Testosterone seems to take joy in making me confused!

Asexual before transitioning, still asexual during transitioning. Just more confused by the overwhelming fantasies that cannot translate over to real life.

[Delsorou]

I started out attracted to women, and as I have transitioned I have surprised myself to find I am only MORE attracted to women now.  I honestly expected that my hatred of my own body was preventing me from properly appreciating men and that I would change my mind once I transitioned.  I deliberately tried to see if it had.  Nope.  Couldn't care less about men.

Honestly kind of bummed me out, I wanted to find out what that was like to be with a man.  But there's just no desire there.  Someday I might meet a man who would change that, but it sure hasn't happened yet.