So I'm starting on testosterone this month and I'm pretty excited about it. I'm (almost) 22 and in my senior year of college and I've been going by my chosen name and pronouns for years now. My mom is fine with all of this, or at least she seems to be. I think she's a little confused but I mean she knows what I'm doing and stuff though she's not very good at using my chosen name or pronouns.
What I'm thinking about, however, is my extended family. Though my mom is liberal and mostly nonreligious, her family is all EXTREMELY religious-- as in religion is the central part of their lives-- and conservative. I have five aunts and an uncle and they almost all have more than one child. After my dad died last winter, my mom decided that she wants to go and celebrate Christmas with them in Arizona and if I want to have Christmas with my mom, that's where I've gotta go. My mom believes they'd be accepting (they're really very nice people, sweet and caring and all that, but their religious beliefs are SO SO important to them) but I'm not so sure. Mom assures me they've all figured out that I like girls (and assume I'm a lesbian) and again, she says they're fine with it, but they've never brought it up and neither have I, though they have mentioned some things to me like their support of that duck dynasty wacko and stuff like that.
Anyway, should I come out to them? Should I just figure that after this year I'll make other plans for Christmas and save both them and myself from what is sure to be a painful coming out process? By the time Christmas rolls around I'll be three months on T. I know most changes take a long time to set in, so do you think they'll be subtle enough to just not mention if I decide not to tell them? If I do decide to tell them how would I even go about it?
Has anyone been in a similar situation? Advice? Thoughts?
