Any other gay (or bi, or pan, etc) trans people out there?

[wolfxheart]

I'm a gay trans man, and while I know rationally that gender and sexuality exist separately and I'm valid in my orientation and all that, but I know a lot of gay trans folk don't get taken as seriously or noticed as much because so much of the population thinks that trans people only exist so a person can be straight. Or at least, I've encountered a lot of that.  I guess gay trans people are a niche within a niche so maybe I shouldn't expect to be plastered everywhere, but still.  Sometimes all that "you just want to be a boy because you had no father figure!" stuff gets to me, I could use some reassurance. 

[Edge]

There are a lot of us. I'm a bi guy currently with a boyfriend.

[Ms Grace]

I have a trans guy friend who is gay and currently has a boyfriend (he's not on this site though). I identify as lesbian.

[Violet Bloom]

  There seem to be plenty of all those types around here, me being one of them as a lesbian transwoman.  I think the lack of understanding in society about the separation of gender and sexuality makes is hard for many people to understand that there is a difference between a gay man and a straight transgender woman.  (Or a straight man and a gay transgender woman as they would see me.)  It didn't help me a lot pre-transition that many people suspected I was a gay man when I wasn't at all.  They could not see that my traits were that of a lesbian woman.  It actually took me forever to reach that conclusion for myself thanks to all this societal conditioning.  I don't blame anyone, even straight transpeople, for not 'getting it' because you can only truly understand how it feels to be gay if you actually are gay.  It completely changes the relationship dynamic between partners and it has a significant effect on what types of personalities and presentations you find instinctively attractive.  People often don't understand why I would need to become a woman in order to effectively date women.  They can't see that it is a different sort of woman that is compatible with me.  That said I expect to have to find a lesbian woman who is very open-minded in order to be successful (or perhaps a woman who is bi/pan/queer).  There are plenty of cis gay people who don't feel transpeople are legitimate gay relationship candidates, particularly surrounding pre-op/non-op issues.

[sebster]

Most of my transmale friends are gay. I'm actually the only one I know IRL that is into girls.

[Amadeus]

I'm pansexual and I'm a transman.  I think I was twenty-eight, twenty-nine before I figured out that a person's gender, gender identity, and gender expression, none of it matters.  What matters is when you find that one person who really connects with you, to the point that it feels like your two souls are always hand-in-hand.  What was it Gomez said about Morticia?  "I loved her not for the way she danced with my angels, but for the way the sound of her name could silence my daemons."  And holy crap, were they ever the most perfect couple!  And that, I truly believe, is what Meine Geliebte and I have.  I'm a very lucky man.

[Ayden]

Gay trans guy here and married to a gay guy. We exist and there are gay folks who see us as we are.

[big kim]

Bi here,i was bi before HRT and transitioning.Then it was like girls 75%,guys 25%.now it's 50/50,I have rice if I had noodles last time

[Rotika]

I'm still pretty early on into figuring myself out. But I think I'm Bi Trans. I'm a girl stuck in a guys body.. but I like girls. I kinda like some guys. But I'm so picky about the guys. Would I ever have sex with a man? Yes. Would I think it was the hottest thing on earth? Likely not. But I would try it more than once just to see. So I guess I'm either a lesbian or bi trans mtf. idk. The more I stare at all the definitions the more my head hurts. Hope this makes sense. 

[♥︎ SarahD ♥︎]

Personally, I identify as gynosexual (means "I'm attracted to women", for those who don't know).  I use that term because it takes the whole issue of my own gender completely out of the equation.  Otherwise, what am I?  Am I straight because I was born a guy, or am I a lesbian because I'm really a girl inside?  Obviously to us the answer is the later, but explaining that to others gets tedious.  Just telling people I'm gynosexual, then when they stare at me blankly I briefly explain by saying "I like women", it's much quicker and easier.  If I want to go into it deeper I can (like I've just done here ), because it's a good simple way to get people to start thinking "oh yeh, why do we tie gender and sexuality together anyway?".

So yeh, call me a lesbian, I'm more than happy with that, but I mildly prefer gynosexual because it's easier for me to explain to others, plus it sounds really cool too

Oh one thing I should point out though - I'm completely impartial to genitals.  I love them all to be brutally honest hehe   It's just when it comes to the rest of a person's body and their gender ID that I start making distinctions (don't know what it is, but masculinity and the male form has just never done anything for me - sorry guys ).  So er, I don't know if that makes me borderline bisexual maybe?

<3 *hugs* <3

[Rachel]

My first voluntary sexual relationship, not fling, was with a guy for 4 year (high school).  So I guess that was heterio? My second relationship was with a cis woman so I guess lesbian. I had flings with guys, girls and trans in all ethnic backgrounds in college, I guess I would call that queer. I would guess, 75% guy and 25% girl pre and post hrt. If I became single I would only be with a guy going forward.

I know the above sounds confused so I call myself BI but if anyone else can label it better, please do.

[Emmaline]

Dykey, dyke, dyke here.  We outnumber straight trans girls, I hear.

[patrick1967]

Gay trans male. Managed to fake it as a str8 woman for that reason. Didnt fit.

[DangerTom]

No father figure?! Jeez. People can also say you had "no mother figure" and that's why you don't want to identify as female. Gender psychology contains a lot of bunk; any gender therapist worth his weight in dirt will tell you it's valid to be a gay transguy. It's hard to know who to listen to sometimes, and there's a lot of hate out there.

Anyways I'm feeling pretty bi/gay-male-ish, if it makes you feel better that you're not the only one.

[Jill F]

Bi/pan here.  I'm married to a woman, mind you, but she's dudelier than I ever was.

If I wasn't married, I'd pretty much f*** anyone that was cool.  I don't have these hangups over gender.

[kelly_aus]

Lesbian here.. After a life as a gay guy.. No, it wasn't hormones - just introspection.

[MajorTom]

Transman here, I've wondered about my orientation for ages... I like to call it "heteroflexible" 

[captains]

Bi before I realized I was trans, still bi now. Although, it is a little weird because the easiest was for me to track my dysphoria is whether being attracted to a girl or a guy leaves me thinking "wow, that was gay." 

[Eevee]

Bi/pan/whatever here. I don't really exercise that, since I'm usually single. I'm happy that way, but I leave my options open.

[adrian]

Gay transman, married to a straight, cis husband (I'm pre-everything). I honestly don't think my sexual orientation will change as I start to transition. I just totally love guys