Waiting list is killing me

[Feather]

So I talked with my therapist about my gender issues the past few months. I really feel it isn't enough and I want to talk with doctors about the possibilities. I want to do something about my voice and body/facial hair and if I become their patient I could actually get all of that for free (in my country). However, I just received an email stating that the waiting list for one hospital is 1/1.5 year and for another it is around 6 months. I feel like I'm running a race against time. What should I do in the mean time? This is making me desperate and hopeless. Is anyone here from Netherlands and aware of other options (wallet-friendly!) concerning voice and hair removal? I have friggin nightmares about hair that's growing back.

[Alice Rogers]

So I talked with my therapist about my gender issues the past few months. I really feel it isn't enough and I want to talk with doctors about the possibilities. I want to do something about my voice and body/facial hair and if I become their patient I could actually get all of that for free (in my country). However, I just received an email stating that the waiting list for one hospital is 1/1.5 year and for another it is around 6 months. I feel like I'm running a race against time. What should I do in the mean time? This is making me desperate and hopeless. Is anyone here from Netherlands and aware of other options (wallet-friendly!) concerning voice and hair removal? I have friggin nightmares about hair that's growing back.

I was past hope about my voice, but my therapist has helped lots, simply telling me that most voice pitch is trained and through habit, since then (about 4 or 5 months ago) I have gone from a deep male voice to a more neutral tone simply through practise (this helps the muscles in your throat adjust too) and it just keeps getting better!

Alice
xx

[Feather]

Hi Feather, I'm Dutch too  (six months hrt @ VUmc)

Use the time you have to wait to develop yourself don't stand still, work on yourself.
You will benefit from that when going into diagnostics because you're already on your way, they will notice that.

All your progress you have to do yourself, they will help you with a prescription for hrt, voice, laser BUT you will have to do everything yourself.
I see them more as guards checking if everything goes well, you are responsable for a successfull transition, they will not take you by the hand.

If you have problems (other than dysphoria) try to solve them before starting your transition, they can and will slow your transition down, they won't dissapear magically and can make things worse when hrt start to do it's work. (it can also slow diagnostics down  )

Nothing is stopping you becoming yourself, you can start when you want, remember hrt takes months to start working and you will have to survive that time also under the supervision of the gendertam AND in the gender role you wish to live in.

Voice therapy and laser you can get after three months in (green light) so that cost a little time also.

6 months to diagnostics isn't that much time @ the VU, It costed me almost a year to get trough the waiting list last year, they speeded up the process a lot since then.

So, use your time, get therapy (transvisie is very good) and learn to cope with problems.
If only hairs making you already freak out, wait to you start transition, that can bring a whole new level of problems when you're not ready for it.

I had more than 2 years therapy pre-hrt, and that made me so strong that i now really enjoy transition, and face the problems with it head on.
And believe me, you will need that energy and power to face the world and everything it shuffes at you sometimes.

I wanna warn you for cheap IPL treatments, get real laser at a dermatologist or paramedic, IPL can mess the pigment in your hairs up and then laser no longer is an option.

My view: little patience, work on yourself, and get it done the right way.

Also I find the dutch forums very negative about almost everything (that's why I am here  ), my VU experience is great, and Suzan's all the better!

Suzanne.

Thanks Suzanne for your post..

I honestly don't know what to do right now.. I don't understand why I have to wait for ''green light'' so I can get voice training and laser treatment. I understand they're critical before giving you hormones, but the other stuff? Basically, if I want to transition I first have to live as a woman full time and only then can I get voice training and laser treatment. I find this a bit harsh. Thanks for the information about hair removal, I do have a very sensitive skin so I need the most skin-friendly option (if such a thing is possible)..

[Athena]

Just try to remember that even being on the waiting list is progress.