Have you ever had someone or many people in your life, that they overwhelm you constantly?
I am a regular person, not much different and much more alike to everyone. This is also a target towards the "rise to fame" idea that many societies seem to become more adapted and conditioned to. Having so many people in your life, consistently trying to persuade and manipulate you to believe in their idea of what a great life is. So even being content through what feels to be a 24hour 7day sequence of "tests", it can wear on a person. I do not claim any label associated with the "new age" but I do identitfy empathic, have very deep intellectual thoughts and conversations to myself that seem to demonstrate how much progress, that I, have set as a standard as to what progress (or then "spiritual enlightment"). To the masonic observations I pick up instantly by examining the structure of a building, fibers of a book cover, the ability to almost instantly heal my body with whatever soure or sources I use. Life is pretty amazing. I have a sense of fulfillment, no yearn to chase what pressures are stressed upon me, sure they do seem very entertaining but in a time and moment for myself, I want to live life a certain way as of right now. Visions I have had, some recently as just a day ago, some weeks, mainly now the month visions are coming to existence and those I can recall from childhood moments, and not all are recall by self, the moments happen in the present, then, now. (FYI totally not great at this grammar thing, neither punctuation.. I just go).. Rushed with what I should do, others would easily grasp for what they feel are very beautiful changes of life. Resisting this, others can claim that I am "stupid", "blind", "ungrateful" and yada yada.. Not all is cherries (which I LUV as a pie).. Others which I label influences that want to "break you down" or "my way or the highway".. Ugly.. character wise... To give right to pry into a sole persons life, throw their past abuse and ->-bleeped-<-ed up past years in their face... That is simple, easy blahblah terms... I mean the sneers you can pick up when people think to have a "one up" on you.. To believe they know something that you don't, but you play their game.. let them ALL believe they have control.. To laugh and heckle in admiration to what they believe is intelligence and "for the better", yet through anothers vision you internally shake your head in wonder of how people can be so mislead and truly... Lost.. I am no better, but as the observer of this experience of what I am, I damn well understand the constants of in and out interaction between I and the "external" world. Emapthy.. A attribute in life that can be so giving but if not mastered can contribute much more problems.. Knowledge is power.. Hold on with me, (if you even got this far.. APPLAUD) and think in relation to Alchemy.. Knowledge.. and blahblah.. do not take blah blah as minor.. little goes a long way.. Look we exist!
.. So let me tell you my goal.. I have a passion and drive to become very engulfed into Life.. YOu know.. Physics Degree and maybe get to work in areas only in my grasp through imagination.. Get my OWN place, the simple.. One room.. yada yada.. that would be my pad.. I would have crystals decorting, one dog, one cat that would be very wise.. I mean VERY.. and whatever else aha.. so got lazy thinking about that... I would work a 9 to 5 and be very happy with my job. I am trying to become a bartender or server.. Simple and fun.. and eventually have a boyfriend move in or w/e... This is 2yrs from now talk.. Not to go into detail, but money does not buy love. Ew... So many misconceptions.. People give themselves rights to take information from you, especially if they are children who gossip, are continously jealous, bitter, discriminative, or simply push their agenda on what they think "works".. To each their own.. That boils down to the beautiful experience I am going through, again transitioning.. Bout 2weeks in now.. YAY.. Feeling great! Mind, Body, Soul.. Intellect? aha.. All the above and to all that is... Past lives to now.. Whew.. My transition seems to be a livestock show where I am subjected to meet certain standards set by those of the past and those currently.. To manifest a singular view, well from what seems.. a singualr view of what the "holistic view" is... I should do this, wear this.. Mannerisms atuned to this way, so much.. Especically dealing with various forms of backgrounds.. You only win, when you believe in YOU.. and this is not to put out that I "only walk for me".. but when the basic life skills we have as a mass mentality are misconstrued truths, fabricated lies and bitter half-truths.. When people want to help, you just want to push it away.. Especially with hidden agendas that seem to have thoughts of their own to control these people I meet throughout my days, weeks, months.. and years... I am proud to admit a sense or feeling of evolving.. not to create a barrier from others and I.. It is a reference towards where I were in a state of existence to where I am currently at now.. Fame, who needs it.. Not my style.. Others may crave it, I, not at all.. I am an introverted nerd who loves "the workings of life", has a MEAN sweet tooth, enjoys dancing alone, aspires to reach academic goals, is a BAWS on League of Legends, smokes ganja joints daily, yearns for privacy, boy crazy and wants to make an honest living.. Yeah, people may believe in your story or you.. but I respect that.. I do not want that life, and if their is any way I could take it back I would.. MAybe it is a mix of "lavish life" and you "sick monster".. Yea.. society, increasing intel with a stagnant surrounding.. OUCH... BUt when you experss yourSELF, all hell breaks loose.. MAybe I should just shut my eyes.. the ones that blink, and the 3rd one...
... I always get to these forums in attempt to let it all out.. but sychronistically I fail in that goal, and understand great knowledge, great responsibility.. What goes on in a day... But I honestly appreciate it.. And that is kinda cray.. Another example and possibilities of life.. Till next time.. and the near future.. When quantum topics and ideas can be showcased.. *cough more like Eureka influences, consciousness and comprehensions.. Whua? Idk..
Oh wealthy folk, CIA, FBI, MSP or w/e, Military.. PEople who believe to know me.. #Life
