Therapy Online vs Face-to-face

[FriendsCallMeChris]

I need advice.  I've had one video conferencing therapy session.  The therapist was very reassuring and had some answers to my questions --but I'm not one to open up to people easily and the online thing felt very distancing.  I think I need to see body language in order to build trust. In my teeny town, there are no gender identity therapists.  There aren't even any lgbt friendly ones.  (But there are plenty of reparative ones! Eeek!)

Finally, there is a new therapist about an hour and a half away who might be okay.  He's trans*, so I'm thinking he might know something about being trans*. But he charges a lot. And he's wanting to do video conferencing as he hasn't set up his office yet.

I don't need a letter to start T. The first therapist will give me one if I need it, but I can do informed consent as easily.  I really would like some expert help with my headspace for the social and relationship and professional aspects that my transitioning will change. 

So, is it me?  Should I just go with the video conferencing? Uncomfortable/not in depth therapy is better than no therapy?  Are there any tips or tricks for making video conferencing seem more personal/more safe?

Chris

[LordKAT]

Wish I could help with that, I feel just the opposite. Meeting in person is difficult. 3D computer monitor?

[Mariah]

I don't mind doing it online, but then I had no other option since the same person is a good 2 hours away. I can see how you feel it is kind of distancing that way though. I would keep the screen as close as you can to you. Also what program are using to video conference through because the smaller their picture is too you will amplify this affect. Besides my pets, I have the house alone when I have my therapy appointments otherwise it would be not as good of an experience. So keeping the screen closer to you, try and make the picture of the therapist as full screen as possible because the bigger they are the more likely you can pick up on their body language. If they are just giving you a face shot of themselves, then try getting them to give you one that shows more of the body so you can take in some of the body language that your wanting to feel more like you are there. I think there are ways to improve the video experience that will help it work out better. It's true it never will completely replace the experience that you would get in person, but it can be tweaked to a point where it should become therapeutic enough for you to get by with. Hugs
Mariah

I need advice.  I've had one video conferencing therapy session.  The therapist was very reassuring and had some answers to my questions --but I'm not one to open up to people easily and the online thing felt very distancing.  I think I need to see body language in order to build trust. In my teeny town, there are no gender identity therapists.  There aren't even any lgbt friendly ones.  (But there are plenty of reparative ones! Eeek!)

Finally, there is a new therapist about an hour and a half away who might be okay.  He's trans*, so I'm thinking he might know something about being trans*. But he charges a lot. And he's wanting to do video conferencing as he hasn't set up his office yet.

I don't need a letter to start T. The first therapist will give me one if I need it, but I can do informed consent as easily.  I really would like some expert help with my headspace for the social and relationship and professional aspects that my transitioning will change. 

So, is it me?  Should I just go with the video conferencing? Uncomfortable/not in depth therapy is better than no therapy?  Are there any tips or tricks for making video conferencing seem more personal/more safe?

Chris

[BreezyB]

I think it comes down to first of all working out what is best for you. So if everything was perfect and there were no road blocks, which would be better for you? Then I suppose practicality comes into it. Personally I prefer one to one therapy. I just prefer it. But everyone will be different. If you must do video, I think your going to be working within the boundaries of that technology. It just comes with the territory.

[FTMax]

For me, it's the exact opposite. I'm not really comfortable talking about things in person, so online therapy is the only option as far as I'm concerned. I'm lucky to live in an area where there are a plethora of therapists that specialize in trans* mental health, but after shopping around, I've found that they are all 2-3x more expensive than the online option that I'm currently pursuing.

Ultimately, I think it really depends what your biggest goal with therapy is, and what you think you would need to achieve it. For me, it's less about mental health and more about fulfilling the requirements that I need for HRT and top surgery. Because of that, I'm much more comfortable doing online sessions that may seem impersonal - they're a means to an end.

I'd say talk to the therapist you've been seeing before pursuing anything else. Maybe they can find a way to make it feel more personal for you with some better positioning, microphone use, etc.

[FriendsCallMeChris]

thanks everyone.  I've given one online session a try.  I'm going to keep at it a bit more, I guess, as that seems to be my best option.  Thanks for all the encouragement!