FTM Facebook groups: the good, the bad, and the ugly?

[Marcellow]

I'm only part of FTM Mancave and FTM Fitness Gym.

[MrSeahorse]

It's one thing we won't tolerate as moderators. We aren't normally heavy handed about it if we see "gender policing" in general (for instance, a thread that reads: Do you think the breast stroke is a feminine swimming stroke"). One of us will usually come and say something like "REALLY?!" ) Otoh, "You, Mr Seahorse, should not do "x" because men don't do this." very likely gets the post deleted. No, I have no patience for this one.


--Jay

I love FTM Moderated. You guys run a great group.

[aleon515]

Can't claim to be responsible, Mr. Seahorse. I co-moderate *another* group (Trans men over 40). I think I was commented on moderating.

--Jay

I love FTM Moderated. You guys run a great group.

[Ayden]

I was denied access to groups since I'm not "out" on Facebook. I have elderly family on mine who honestly I love too much to shock. After the 3rd denial of access I gave up.

[FTMax]

Really Ayden? I think I've seen at least a handful of people who don't seem to be out on Facebook in the few groups that I've joined. I can give you the names of those groups if it's something you'd like to take another shot at.

[LittleBoyBear]

I want to like them so much more than I do so far. (I sent a request and my initials are D R)

I keep getting gender policing in the one I'm in now. (e.g. Men don't do ____!)

I just have no patience for that.

I'd like to stray off topic for a second and address this. I have gotten a fair amount of this said to me over the last few weeks and it sort of upsets me. Like, do people not realize when they say this that they are implying that I am "not a 'real man'"? Furthermore, why do they feel like I need to be 100% macho crazy man? I don't feel the need to be a binary guy. Lastly, plenty of men DO do whatever it is I'm doing in the moment.
The best part is when I point out how it makes me feel, and they get defensive and say they were "only trying to help". Smh.

[Ayden]

Really Ayden? I think I've seen at least a handful of people who don't seem to be out on Facebook in the few groups that I've joined. I can give you the names of those groups if it's something you'd like to take another shot at.

I'd be willing to try, yeah. I mean, most of my family have known for years but I never did anything on fb since I have a bunch of family who I don't see, but I don't need to cause problems between my grandmother and her siblings. It just doesn't seem worth it to get a bunch of folk in their 70s and 80s worked up and fighting with each other.

[FTMax]

I'd be willing to try, yeah. I mean, most of my family have known for years but I never did anything on fb since I have a bunch of family who I don't see, but I don't need to cause problems between my grandmother and her siblings. It just doesn't seem worth it to get a bunch of folk in their 70s and 80s worked up and fighting with each other.

Word, I feel you. Well, if you're interested, I am in: FTM ManCave, FTM Moderated, and FTM Personals. I have definitely seen people in all three of those who aren't officially out on Facebook, though you may need to message an admin for the first two to introduce yourself, since those are FTM only groups.

[aleon515]

We've accepted quite a lot of people with feminine names. That seems odd to me, but might have been how we first screened, since our group is for trans guys over 40 only.

--Jay