How important are clothes to your alleviation of dysphoria

[cathyrains]

It's a little more complicated than just "put on this set of clothes and feel better". Clothes, in a social context, are a uniform whether conscious or not. For me dysphoria often comes from wearing the "wrong uniform" and has nothing to do with inherent curing/ailing properties of a garment.  So sometimes dysphoria can come from nonconformity. The flip side of that coin, of course, is the liberating feeling that sometimes comes from "breaking out" of ones designated uniform.

[ImagineKate]

It's a little more complicated than just "put on this set of clothes and feel better". Clothes, in a social context, are a uniform whether conscious or not. For me dysphoria often comes from wearing the "wrong uniform" and has nothing to do with inherent curing/ailing properties of a garment.  So sometimes dysphoria can come from nonconformity. The flip side of that coin, of course, is the liberating feeling that sometimes comes from "breaking out" of ones designated uniform.

This is how I feel.

Clothes aren't what make me a woman but they tell other people and reinforce that I am one.

They are important to me now as I haven't been on hormone therapy yet (not officially anyway) but when I start to look female naked then clothes won't matter much.

I will say this though, buying feminine clothing is definitely more exhilarating than buying guy clothes! In fact I have bought very few men's clothing myself. Mostly my wife bought them. I just didn't care at all and I found it so boring. But women's clothes? I'm having a blast shopping for my new wardrobe.

[Tessa James]

Clothes and all the other elements of presentation were not as important to my early transition as self acceptance.  Once I was ok with who I am the rest has been wonderfully nice validation. 
I now love shopping and looking more feminine and almost threw all my old boy clothes away.  And then transition has some uncertainty and I appreciate those who have been out longer who find their clothes are just that; clothes that are functional but don't define them.
Giving up trying to look like or dress like a man was and is a huge relief for my dysphoria.  I still squirm a little thinking about a suit and tie.  I further admire those who have arrived at a comfort level with their body where clothes don't matter and are more for fun.  I feel like I am getting there.  Boy clothes never made me a man and girl clothes feel better but don't make me a woman.

[BreezyB]

For me it's the feeling I got from starting HRT, and seeing those changes. I'm starting to feel more complete , more like me! But I do like clothes too, not being full time, I still discarded all my male clothes and now just wear androgynous female clothes out. Work I still have male clothes   

[Leila]

Initially before the HRT, the wearing female clothes was very important to alleviating the stress and dysphoria. They hid the ugliness of my masculinity from view despite being ill fitting on the whole. The image I saw was that of a woman trying to emerge from the sorry excuse of a so called man.

The more I've travelled  along this transitional journey, the wearing of female clothes has lessened as a relief mechanism. What has helped is that during this past year my body has changed from male to that of a more female one; in part due to diet and also thanks to HRT itself.

I am getting my reassurances and alleviation of dysphoria now more from my physical changes. Besides, wearing the old male clothes now just makes me look ridiculous. So from the practical point of view wearing male clothes they largely unflattering as they no longer fit right in any of the obvious places. Even not wearing a bra underneath my male tops I can still see the rounds of my breasts.

[stephaniec]

I have one suit  and I'm  trying to rationalize if I'll ever need it , every thing else is female, a dream come  true.  I hate suits love dresses. I've  never ever felt good in a suit.

[Jill F]

I've never ever felt good in a suit.

Me neither. And don't get me started about tuxedos...  It was like the opposite of that Men's Wearhouse TV ad.  "You're going to hate the way you look.  I guarantee it!"

Actually, early on and pre-HRT, the only thing I did to relieve dysphoria was dress the part for a few weeks.  Honestly, the clothes did very little compared to the HRT. 

For years and years, all I pretty much wore day-to-day were t-shirts and sweatpants.  Gender neutral all the way.

[Carrie Liz]

Not very, honestly. I don't really care what I'm wearing as long as I can be a girl wearing those things. I've gone out in unisex t-shirts and jeans quite often, actually, since transitioning.

My only sticking point is that I still can't really wear "cute" things like other women can, because my shoulders are too big and my body is too square for them. That still causes me dysphoria, that I still can't really wear dresses or look even remotely decent in the "formal" clothes that cis girls love because it "makes them feel like a princess." Yeah... not happening here. I'm still stuck in dark colors, pants, and flats. Anything else and I'd either be too tall or too visibly-masculine in those feminine clothes.

But still, it's not really the clothes that I'm jealous of, it's the body underneath the clothes. I really just want a body shape that would look feminine enough to be able to wear them. I don't care if I actually do wear them or not, I just want to know that I could if I wanted to, rather than feeling alienated from those female experiences because I know I'll never be able to do them at all.

[Newgirl Dani]

In the beginning before hrt wearing feminine clothes was a desire but once on I could not seem be around a mirror for too in depth of an examination.  It made the contrast of me and the clothes glare back enough to cause big problems.  I do have to give those experiences credit because it was the shock I needed to once and for all confront who I was on the inside.  When that happened, it was the very first time that inner glimmer or spark of the real me came out through my eyes.  Recognition of this for what it truly was was my aha moment, and from that moment on the unveiling began at the same time my old self began to unravel.  Now I am completely comfortable in both womens casual and dressy.  Not really cool with the few guy jeans and t-shirts that I saved for outdoor work but soon I'll even have feminine work clothes....yay.     Dani

[JulieM]

They're my clothes, not the ones I've always had to wear. Even if it's just a T and shorts, they're mine. Mine, mine, mine. All mine.

[Rina]

Very important.

I do however not have to dress very femininely, jeans and a t-shirt (and generally something to cover the scars on my arms; how I wish I had not decided to repress my wish to transition as a teenager) will do, but they have to be women's jeans and t-shirts. Some of the shirts may be androgynous, but even then I at least know I picked them out by myself, because I liked them, not because I had to fit some norm. As for jeans I always wear women's slim or skinny fit models, because I like how they feel (I like that they sit in place), and because I like how they show off my hips, which were broad/feminine to begin with. Before accepting myself, I always wore loose-fitting (sometimes even baggy) suit pants because I knew I looked feminine in tight-sitting jeans.

I'm wearing more (or even very) feminine tops increasingly often these days though, and I can see myself getting rid of most of my more androgynous wardrobe in a year or so. For once in life, I see the fact that clothes from outlets like H&M wear out quickly as a good thing, as it's a good excuse to not keep them for long while transitioning.

[stephaniec]

I truly belong in a dress, but  for me the physical changes are like 90% of the solution,  which could be mostly the mental affects but I've been very lucky with both mental and physical changes. I'm hoping for another good year.