My homeless situation

[Serena]

Ok so, I talked with my school counselor about my situation without saying that I'm trans... I just told her that my household is abusive (both physically and verbally) and she referred me to this person who is supposed to find me an housing and she found a shelter for young men. Young men. It seems terrible for me, and I'm also scared of living in a shelter... I tried looking for jobs but it's not like you get that many options when you go to high school... I know I should have said that I'm trans, but it's hard for me to talk about it openly, especially in this situation. Then yeah I asked about trans shelters or shelters for lgbt people to the lgbt center here in buffalo, but the people there told me that there is no help, and that most of those organizations are funder or ran by churches and therefore are not open to trans individuals. I don't really know what to do at this point, I can't stand to live here anymore.

I'm so desperate, I looked for help and organization things and I know that in NYC there is Ali Forney Shelter but I would have to get there first, and the bus ticket it's like 50 dollars and I definitely want to finish high school so I need to find a school as well... And I never went there, and it's so hard. I really don't know :/

[ImagineKate]

I honestly think you should finish school first. The path will be much clearer once you get there. Otherwise if you go uproot yourself now and move, you could risk not graduating in time and make things worse for you.

Are your parents abusing you because you put on makeup and dress up? Maybe it's time to just stop and bear it for a while until you can finish school and get out of their house.

I know it is really really hard for you but the advice the group gave about finishing up school first is pretty sound. This way you are free from your parents and can live life on your own terms.

However if they just abuse you out of the blue then your better option I'm afraid is to go to a shelter. But I always view the shelter as a last resort. Even if it's one for men, as long as it's not a religious one or anything that doesn't mean you can't take steps to transition while you are there.

Also if they are abusing you, you might be able to get NY OCFS involved. NY state has a hotline for abuse. 1-800-342-3720. If you are being physically harmed and are in immediate danger, call 911.

I am so sorry you're going through this. (hugs)

[Newgirl Dani]

Hi Serena, this is indeed a tough spot to be in.  Let me first say I really do not like to post in someone's thread that needs specific help if I do not have any.  I could not just sit here though and pass it by.  First let me commend you on trying to figure out what steps to take, as many do not and will stay in an unsafe situation.  Second, the only thing I can think of is the immediate need to get out of danger, can you at least stay with a friend from school?  Even a temporary fix is a fix.  Threat of physical abuse is serious and needs to be removed.  My heart is with you, let us know how things are with a periodic update.     Dani

[stephaniec]

I think try working with your school councilor for options, be honest

[amber roskamp]

Ok so, I talked with my school counselor about my situation without saying that I'm trans... I just told her that my household is abusive (both physically and verbally) and she referred me to this person who is supposed to find me an housing and she found a shelter for young men. Young men. It seems terrible for me, and I'm also scared of living in a shelter... I tried looking for jobs but it's not like you get that many options when you go to high school... I know I should have said that I'm trans, but it's hard for me to talk about it openly, especially in this situation. Then yeah I asked about trans shelters or shelters for lgbt people to the lgbt center here in buffalo, but the people there told me that there is no help, and that most of those organizations are funder or ran by churches and therefore are not open to trans individuals. I don't really know what to do at this point, I can't stand to live here anymore.

I'm so desperate, I looked for help and organization things and I know that in NYC there is Ali Forney Shelter but I would have to get there first, and the bus ticket it's like 50 dollars and I definitely want to finish high school so I need to find a school as well... And I never went there, and it's so hard. I really don't know :/

hun the most important thing you can do is get your self out of the house environment. Finishing school is also vital but abuse from family can cause lots of psychological harm. Have you considered staying with a friend?

Also try reaching out to the lgbt community where you live.  Many people are
empathetic to what you are going through. There was a girl in the same boat as you in my town and we were able to help get her off the street.

I have seen some of your other post and you are a beautiful girl. You  have a long life ahead of you. No matter how hard life seems right now you will make it. And you will see brighter days.

[Cee Myk]

Wow. I am so sorry to hear about your situation. I think you should listen to as much input as you can from others who can offer help, seek out more help if it is not there, and then make the best decisions to keep you out of harms way. Even if abuse is addressed and/or eliminated you still have your own mental well-being to tend to. If you feel any signs of depression or hurting yourself, please seek doctor's care immediately. Yet, it sounds like you still have time to make plan A, plan B, plan C, and a couple of contingency plans to always fall back on. My heart goes out to you. Peace.