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Too short to pass?

Started by Headsupbuddy, November 22, 2014, 12:17:34 AM

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Headsupbuddy

Hey all, I know I've been posting a lot lately but I'm just excited to be a part of a forum and be able to discuss this stuff!

Anyway, the more I start the pass the more my height bugs me.
I'm an embarrassing 4 foot 11 inches which is incredibly short even for a woman.
I see all this stuff on the Internet about "surprisingly short" male celebs who are still around 5"5.
And all these women online saying they'd never date a guy under 5"7

:(
I'm already in a happy relationship but just knowing how abnormal most people seem to find it is so upsetting.
Sometimes I wish I was even just an inch or two taller so I could break the 5" mark.
It's a major cause of sadness and dysphoria, especially knowing there's nothing I can do about it, and I'm terrified that my height will make people stop and scrutinise my manliness enough to realise I'm trans.

Has anyone here been called out as trans because of their height?
Would platform shoes help or hinder the situation??
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LoriLorenz

I would say that short or tall shouldn't factor into getting "called out" as trans, but - unless they are hidden platforms - you are more likely to get called out as such with visible platforms.

That said, some people are just short. I'm 5'2" so, in your ballpark and I don't think my height is an issue.

Here's a list of *actually* short male famous people (or infamous) UNDER 5'5" (I went internet trolling to find these guys :) )

Dylan Postl (4'5") (aka Hornswoggle - pro wrestler)
Peter Dinklage (4'5")
Gary Coleman (4'8")
Danny DiVito (5'0")

Angus Young (5'2") (AC/DC Guitarist)
Charles Manson (5'2") >:-)
Kevin Hart (5'2")
Prince (5'2")

Devon Murray (5'3")
Jaye Davidson (5'3")
Nathan McMullen (5'3")
Paul Simon (5'3")

Micheal J. Fox (5'4")
Seth Green (5'4")


(N.B. I removed the 1/2, 1/4, 3/4 from the above, though this will surely dissapoint them!)
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BlueGemFox

Wel, Im a real shortie myself, but my brother, a bio male, is 18 and he only reaches up to my shoulder. Hes around about 4'10" - 4'11" He doesnt have any problem at all (and especially not with the ladies) seeing as he also has a baby face to go with the combination. The most he gets is people still thinking hes 15
~The first steps in a journey are the toughest, but also the most proudest~


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Ephemeral

I used to fuss over this more, feeling discriminated against, especially since I live in Scandinavia and I'm 5"3 something and the average male height here is more like 6 ft, but nowadays I am more annoyed because I cannot find clothes that fit. It's just not possible. If main clothing stores would have XS I'd be good but most of them don't. I've checked the boy's section on occasion, but it's pretty obvious the target audience are... boys. And I'm not.

I don't have issues passing with my height but I'm Asian and it may help as people have a self-perception of Asians being shorter on average compared to other ethnicities so what do I know.
Come watch with me as our world burns.
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Carrie Liz

My trans-guy friend Drew is also 4'11". He's completely stealth. And hell, even I had absolutely no clue that he was trans the first time I met him. Just saying.

People don't gender others based on their height.

If you appear male and are short, you're just a short guy. Just like even though I'm really tall, I appear female, so I'm just a tall girl.
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Headsupbuddy

Thank you everyone for your replies, they've given me a little confidence.
Although being told I'm not much bigger than Gary Coleman doesn't do wonders for me lol, but the rest of those examples were all really reassuring!

The truth is I like being short, I've always loved being everybody's small friend because they all seem to find my height so endearing.
The fear of not passing because of it is a really upsetting feeling, because there's not a lot I like about myself, but my height has always been one of them in the past.
I hope you're all right and that as I start to transition further and pass more that my height isn't an issue, and I can go back to happily being the tiny friend!
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gabimoneratt

There's a 5ft tall guy in my university and he seems to have no problem whatsoever. People think he's short but no one ever thought of him being trsns... I think also the majority of people lack knowledge of trans men... At least in my country if you have male traits people just assume you're a bio male regardless of height, some feminine facial features and all that.
I'm on the tall side for a girl in my country.... Most revolve around 5ft 2 and I'm 5ft 8...people constantly call me tall lol a friend of mine who doesn't know about me even told me he'd not date a girl as tall as me... A lot of guys in my country are shorter than me and wouldn't date a girl taller than them either. But I don't  mind haha you work with what you have :P
Just continue on with your journey and you'll  be fine ^__^
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Ms Grace

I know two cis guys around the 5' mark. One would have women easily if he wasn't always putting himself down about his height. The other one has a gorgeous six foot wife. I also know a trans guy about your height and he has an awesome 6'4" boyfriend. Your height is only a problem if you let it be a problem.
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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Edge

My cis male cousin is around that height too.
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Bimmer Guy

Like everyone else says, there are a lot of short guys and I really don't think it will impact your ability to pass.

However, if it is something that you feel you just cannot accept, you could always get shoe lifts.  I did a quick google and there are tons out there.  These are adjustable:

http://www.theinsolestore.com/clearly-adjustable-heel-lifts.html?zmam=92453369&zmas=1&zmac=2&zmap=CA-100&gclid=CLfz3-HJjsICFaHm7AodFFgAkw
Top Surgery: 10/10/13 (Garramone)
Testosterone: 9/9/14
Hysto: 10/1/15
Stage 1 Meta: 3/2/16 (including UL, Vaginectomy, Scrotoplasty), (Crane, CA)
Stage 2 Meta: 11/11/16 Testicular implants, phallus and scrotum repositioning, v-nectomy revision.  Additional: Lipo on sides of chest. (Crane, TX)
Fistula Repair 12/21/17 (UPenn Hospital,unsuccessful)
Fistula Repair 6/7/18 (Nikolavsky, successful)
Revision: 1/11/19 Replacement of eroded testicle,  mons resection, cosmetic work on scrotum (Crane, TX)



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wolfduality

There's a lot more to passing than just height though I understand the frustration about being on the shorter end. (5'3" here.) More often than not, it's a non-issue especially when you have other masculine characterists/mannerisms and also if you don't make it a big deal. If you carry yourself like your 6' tall, no one will bug you about it. You can't help genetics. My cis male brother is half a foot taller than our dad and my mom is taller than average so my brother got all the "tall genes" so I just learned to deal.
Yours truly,

Tobias.
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aleon515

I am 5'1" and really have no trouble being read as male. I have a trans guy friend who is your height. I believe you would actually be classified as a "little person" for a guy, but little people are read as guys. Actually he and I have talked about it.

--Jay
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invisiblemonsters

confidence is key, that's all i have to say. you'll learn eventually that your height actually isn't an issue and no one cares about it except you and that includes dating because it's a turn off when you're always complaining about it or acting like it's this big issue when it isn't.
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NathanielM

I've got a transguy friend who's about your size too (I think, I haven't measured him) but he just about comes up to my shoulder. He's 30 and he passes great. Just as a smaller guy and a 20year old :p
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Aewin

This is actually a really reassuring thread for me. I'm 5'0" exactly, and I despair of being able to pass even when I get on T because of my height, so all of these examples were great to see. I've been thinking about trying shoe lifts, as Brett suggested, but perhaps if T works out nicely for me I won't feel as much like I need them.
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AdamMLP

I'm 5'2".  I work with a cis guy and his father who are both about 5'4".  None of them know that I'm trans despite my height and being pre-T.

I saw a trans guy once who was well below 5' and pretty skinny/scrawny too, and he passed completely.  I only knew he was trans because it was trans pride and he was one of the exuberant people and took part in a few things.
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Indoctrinated

Your height is just fine. Men in general don't care at all.

The problem is that in a group of men they're sure to pick on any features that stand out... Guess what it's going to be in your case. As long as you don't make it a big deal, all fine. You can always mimic their behaviour and pick on others lol
"Freedom, I must say,
Exists within unconditioned minds"

Dead Can Dance - Indoctrination (A Design for Living)
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darkblade

I've been thinking about how I'd make for such a short guy (I'm 5'3"). But I mean, I stand taller when I feel like a guy, so I guess it's like others said, your confidence is what matters. In general, people will always catch on to things if you make them obvious.

It's nice reading this thread  ;D
I'm trying to be somebody, I'm not trying to be somebody else.
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Mai

one of my managers is barely 5feet.  its really funny if he comes to check on me, specially if im up a ladder, he looks so cute and tiny.  like a bug.  ~squish~

depending on your age, you may still end up growing a few inches.  watch your posture, stand/sit up straight and dont slouch.  get as many inches out of that height of yours you possibly can. :)  alot of people used to think i was alot shorter than i really was cause i slouched alot, then id finally stand or sit up straight and people be like. holy cow!  was tall growing up, but i levelled off fast and everyone else caught up to or passed me after 17/18.
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FTMax

I'm 5'4" and I get read as male the majority of the time despite not being on hormones yet. As others have said, a lot of it has to do with how you carry yourself.
T: 12/5/2014 | Top: 4/21/2015 | Hysto: 2/6/2016 | Meta: 3/21/2017

I don't come here anymore, so if you need to get in touch send an email: maxdoeswork AT protonmail.com
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