Emotions, feelings and looks before HRT and after

[Lostkitten]

Are there any trans women around who already lived like a woman before going on HRT?

It is a brave thing from one day to another to make that swap, to go full-time and rock it. I know I couldn't so I took it slowly. Step by step, growing my hair out, changing my style of clothing and wearing bits of make-up. I started to watch series I actually enjoyed instead of some world war action movie ->-bleeped-<- which were about explosions and gun shots which usually just bored me.

Because of all the above my emotions already changed a lot. Yesterday I watched this video:

only about twenty times, and I can't help but tearing up every time he starts singing all out.

I noticed that I am much closer to my emotions than I was about two years ago. I have changed and even psychically even just slightly. I can see some chances which are quite weird since no HRT changed my body yet.

But then I do start to wonder, and worry a little. To many HRT is quite the impact, changing your emotions, giving mood swings, tears, changing body hair, fat, and such. As for me I want to start HRT mainly because of the male bald pattern and that is my main reason. I really do wonder if there are trans-women around who lived like a woman before HRT and recognize my story. Did HRT still have a strong impact on you or does a sudden swap together with HRT mean it hits you harder?

[Jessica Merriman]

I went full time before HRT. Being female to me is not about hormone levels, but what is in your heart, soul and mind. Full time was an expression of who I really am. Having the benefits of HRT is only icing on the cake. Hormones and surgeries do not make a woman. Belief in herself does. 

[TSJasmine]

I lived completely as a girl before I started hormones :p I started when I was 16 but began living as a girl & growing my hair out, wearing makeup, living as a girl, etc. when I was 14. I was small & pretty prepubescent at the time though so I looked like a girl. That didn't stop the testosterone from kicking in though & even though I was living as a girl, I looked like a guy I still feel like I look like a guy honestly lol

[Seras]

Nope. I am pretty tall, deep voice and all that. Some real anxiety and confidence issues, I didn't think I could. When my NHS doctors said I had to, I refused and paid for a doctor instead who would do what I wanted. I am now doing a slow transition while on HRT. I feel a lot less anxious now about all sorts of things and also more confident about what I am doing now that I can see I have changed physically and am rocking androgyny.

However when I first accepted myself I did have a strong shift in my emotions, but this was nothing compared to the recent change I have experienced after 6 months of no T which is actually shocking to me (lol that video made me tingle all down my back didn't cry though ). I wouldn't worry about HRT not mattering to you. I think it will, although my experience is different from the one you describe I simply cannot see it not having an appreciable effect.

[ImagineKate]

I'm not going full time unless I'm on HRT. At least not at work. Reason being I want something to back up my gender change and using the women's facilities. I'm pretty sure work Won't have an issue but there might be an odd ball or two.

[JustASeq]

I went full time once I came out to myself. It was 4 months before I started HRT, my name had been legally changed already. Also it may have been helpful that I was out as non-binary for about 6 months prior. Now that I have been on HRT for about 5 months myself as well as others are starting to notice the physical changes and it shows in my interactions. Knowing who I am and being misgendered takes a huge emotional toll although have felt no emotional or psychological changes otherwise. Maybe more confidence and the ability to be assertive, but my therapist equates that too me expressing my true self. At this point, I'm happy that I have had this experience and will continue this journey.