DO you pass?

[TheQuestion]

I can do a solid female voice with much effort, but physically I'm not sure if I'll get there.  Guess I'll let you know in a couple years...

[Hex]

In public I'm passing 100% now. I went to a very crowded concert last week and got nothing but sir, dude, bro ect.
Now if I have to show my ID since I haven't gotten things changed over, I get extremely weird looks but thankfully no one has questioned it yet. I do fear though that eventually someone will or even say I've stolen someone's ID.
I've had instances where family or even where a store owner that knew me before transition has outed me in front of others who assumed I was male so that was fun.. not.

But as far as complete strangers when I'm around, no one knows any different now which is nice. The only quip I have now is the fact I sound like a very flamboyant male which bothers the crap out of me.

[Lynne]

I pass most of the time it seems, even when I'm not trying, but my voice and the little facial hair left are sometimes causing confidence problems and that can easily lead to not passing. I really need to work more on my voice, this is far the worst problem right now, because I still did not reach the level where my voice alone could be gendered female or at least andro at all times.

[JLT1]

I pass.  I taught a course a few weeks ago to a group of total strangers.   After the course I was talking with three of the students when a guy came up who I have known for several years and outed me in front of the students.   They were stunned that I was trans.  They heard me talk and watched me teach for hours and didn't know. 

After that I got even more confident and haven't been misgerdered once since.

Jen

[Ms Grace]

Apparently yes I do, I guess most of the time.

Last week I was changing some name documents. The woman from the bank had a bit of a chat with me about the weather before we got to the business at hand. I told her I was changing my name and that I was transgender. She did a good job at hiding it but I could tell I had really surprised her, she had no clue until I told her. And that's despite me being 6'3" tall.

[immortal gypsy]

Apparently yes I do, I guess most of the time.

Last week I was changing some name documents. The woman from the bank had a bit of a chat with me about the weather before we got to the business at hand. I told her I was changing my name and that I was transgender. She did a good job at hiding it but I could tell I had really surprised her, she had no clue until I told her. And that's despite me being 6'3" tall.

Most of the time? Uh trust me Grace I have had the pleasure of meeting you in real life (only briefly I'll admit). I can't see how you don't pass for cis all 6'3" of you.

[TSJasmine]

... my transition should have been a complete shambles according to the "any transition over age 15 will be a disaster" brigade.

I started at 16 Well, I'm happy so if that's what being a disaster is like, then call me a train wreck struck by lightning.

On a more serious note, I'm not sure honestly. To a degree, yes. Completely? I doubt it. I don't remember the last time anyone I've ever met has called me a "he". If they're new to meeting me, then they call me she & I don't ever have to ask them to. I've had people tell me that they told they're friend who briefly saw me that I'm a tgirl & they didn't know. I've been directly in guys faces & they didn't know I was a tgirl. I've actually noticed that it's easier for a guy to think I'm a regular girl than a cis girl does. I usually get clocked by girls, but that actually is probably because when a girl is talking to me I lose my guard since they're girls & aren't potentially going to beat me up if they realize I'm a tgirl. Plus, girls usually just do the whole "Oh my god you're so pretty!". I would say, I pass about... 85% of the time. Some people might just have a good eye & know & the other ones hear my voice. Even if they do hear my voice, they don't ever call me a "he" though. I think I look & act too girly to be actually considered a guy. & if anyone ever did call me a "he", I would definitely tell them something.

Bottom line, no. I don't think I'm completely passable. I think it's kind of foolish for people to assume they are because a few of the Tgirls I've met that swear they're fish as hell aren't nearly as passable as they think . I don't want to be that tgirl & I don't think my insecurities would let me be anyways.

[Cindy]

Interesting question.

In public yes, I'm never misgendered (nowadays), in private with colleagues a few males are still confused (they knew me as a 'male' for many years and stumble sometimes).

<As an addendum I mentioned today that I could not attend a management meeting next Feb, when asked why I said I was being replumbed and rewired, the guys cringed, the woman came over and hugged me.

Maybe misgendering is a fear factor response for guys?>

[Ms Grace]

Most of the time? Uh trust me Grace I have had the pleasure of meeting you in real life (only briefly I'll admit). I can't see how you don't pass for cis all 6'3" of you.

That's very kind of you, hon, thank you

[Sydney_NYC]

I pass extremely well. I have not been mis-gendered in public since March so I must be doing something right especially with all 6' 7" of me. The only time I ever get mis-gendered is from those that knew me from before and they always correct themselves, but it's rare that it happens anymore. Voice wise, my pitch averages in the 175-195 Hz range which isn't bad, but my resonance is excellent. Unfortunately a lot of that resonance gets lost on the phone due to technology issues (cell phones sound so much worse than the older landline phones).

[missymay]

I always get gendered correctly, and I've never had a problem in a women's restroom, but I just think people give me the benefit of the doubt and an (A) for effort, since I have more female characteristics than male.

[Jill F]

I certainly don't FAIL.  Well, unless you count "as male", in which case I've consistently failed my entire life. 

[Ms Grace]

Maybe now you need to change your name from Jill F to Jill A+...

[Ataraxia]

When I present as female, I'm usually gendered female. I've never been clocked or addressed as male when I was presenting as female (not to my face, at least). I know there's a lot of people who are hung up on this notion that "people might just be being nice". The thing is, I don't care. I'm satisfied with the way I'm treated when I present as female--that's more important to me than "passing".

[ImagineKate]

Maybe misgendering is a fear factor response for guys?

Hmm.

Maybe misgendering is a mental reassurance that they are talking to a gender they establish in their brain, even though their brain is conflicted as to what you really are. I'm sure there's research somewhere out there that confirms or debunks this, LOL.