Going to a gender therapist today

[BlaineGame]

I'm excited but nervous about going to see this therapist. I mean, I have no idea how this will go. Will I be trans or will I not? I'm not rooting for either cuz both are difficult for me to face. I have met such great, kind people on this site and if I'm not trans...does that mean I can't come on this site anymore? And if I am trans, I'll have to go through a lot in order to be happy with myself. But it would be worth it if I was finally happy.

Anyway, what should I mention during the session? I will mention my bullying problems I had in the past as well as my depression and anxiety problems. I will also talk about how I'm attracted to gay men instead of straight men...also, I will mention how I've been writing gay fiction and envying my male characters. Should I mention how exactly the dysphoria started? To be honest, I'm not exactly sure how it happened. It kinda creeped up on me. But I can try to explain what happened.

Should I mention how badly I wanna be on T or would that seem desperate? I really want to appear male; I want the deep voice and facial hair. I want the flat chest and genitals...should I mention that as well?

Some advice would be great 

[Alexis2107]

Relax honey you'll be fine.  It really is up to you to decide if you're trans or not, the therapist should be a tool to help you decide.  I asked for hormones my first session but the therapist wanted me to come in for a second session.  For me, she went over my past starting pre school through adult, now.  It sounds to me that you're trans if you are wanting to transition to male.  Congrats on starting the first steps, and do hope you get your much needed hormones soon.  Just don't expect things to be in a hurry, it took me three months from the time I decided to transition to getting my first hormones prescription.  Mostly due to the fact doctors are busy and getting in requires a month wait.  You will need to tell your therapist your strong desire to transition to male and how long you've had these feelings, etc... That wasn't really discussed until my second session, then she gave me my letter to take to the doctor for HRT

[BlaineGame]

Okay, thank you Alexis. I'll be calm lol. And I can wait as long as it takes to get my hormones because I know it will be worth the wait. As long as I know I will get them eventually, I can wait a long time.

[Eva Marie]

Above all - be brutally honest in anything that you say and don't hold anything back. You will not shock the therapist with anything that you say and you are not there to make friends with the therapist. You are there to get a better understanding of who you are and the therapist has access to tools and experience to facilitate that process - but only if you are honest with him.

As far as what to say - the therapist can help you with that. She will ask questions and before you know it your time will fly by and it'll be time to go. I would go into my therapists office with a list of things I thought we should talk about and our conversations would go all over the map (that seems to happen when two women start talking  ) and nothing on my list would get talked about 

The hardest question is usually the first one, which usually goes something like this: So, why are you here today?

I would hold off on demands for hormones until you have established a relationship with the new therapist.

[BlaineGame]

The therapy session went well. I will be seeing her every other week starting December. She also put me in a support group which I can't wait to attend. Things are turning out well 

[adrian]

Excellent! I'm glad it went well. I hope you can relax a little now .

[BlaineGame]

Thank you adrian! I can relax more now because I was able to talk to a specialist about my problems and feel so much better!

[jasellebelle]

Did you go to therapy to start your transition or to see if you really wanted/needed to transition?

[BlaineGame]

Hmm...that's a good question. My mom convinced me to go to see if I actually wanted to transition or if it was just a phase...but I wanted to go so I could start my transition.