Unreasonable Me

[katrinaw]

Well it´s looking better now.  After our crisis my wife needed to think this through and i gave her space to do that. Late last night when i thought she had was asleep
and i was deep in thought i felt her lips on the back of my neck and her arms wrapped around me.  She said, if this is what you really need to do i am with you,
i give you my consent.  It was a magic moment, one i won´t forget and i told her dear this is the best gift i have received, you give me life.  We have had problems
before but we both believe in our love and want to make this family work and so we find a way.  i know there will be other times when worries or doubts will trouble her
and i am just going to take this one step at a time.  Our sex life had already changed in the last few years, it´s more loving and intimate now, like a couple of lesbians.
It did bother her at first, she considers herself hetero, but we worked it, our common sense of humor has really helped with that.  If she decides that she wants
a lover to fulfill her sexual needs we will deal with that too.  Maybe i am being too optimistic, but i really believe in our love.

Hi Linda, sounds a good step forward. Happy for you... Was a bit sad for you when I read the opening statement... Definitely a roller coaster... stay positive, I am sure things will all work out right....
Sorry to hear that the rules around HRT are so tough... hope you can win that one 

L Katy

[adrian]

Go, Linda [emoji4]  I'm happy for you that your wife is supportive -- I can imagine how much it means to you.

[lindagrl]

Thank you Katy and Adrian, i appreciate your words of support.  i am doing okay today, long may that last.
It might seem to some that i am an insufferable drama queen, but i actually think i am doing well considering what i am dealing with.
i am not healed from a recent r, it really knocked the stuffing out me and is to a large extent the reason behind my suffering self image
and lack of confidence in all matters. No one who has not gone through it can know what a soul crushing debilitating thing that is.

It´s two steps forward and one to two steps back, but i can feel myself getting it better together with each day that passes.
It´s two months since i stopped using weed so my head has cleared much and dread is less an issue now, all good things.
Have decided to get an interview with the head psychologist over the trans program. The guy scares me but i have to do it,
perhaps i am all wrong and he will be supportive of my transition.
Linda