Hi, just found this fab site- and although I'm not transgendered as such- I think I fit in here better than many places...
Born female, I have spent 3/4 of my life feeling er... not like I believe a typical (
) woman should feel, I suppose.. I wanted to be a boy for most of my childhood, and a man for most of my teens/ 20's- but the type of man I wanted to be was not a 'typical' one, so it wasn't a straightforward thing at all- still haven't really figured myself out tbh.. I identified best with gay men, I think- but in some ways I'm more asexual. I enjoy sex but can take or leave it- and I'm mainly attracted to (well, personalities, obviously, but) faces and non-gendered parts. I like androgynous people mainly, and am pretty androgynous myself- only my height (short!) makes me seem more boyish than manly.. I generally apparently look either like a boy, or people's idea of a typical tomboy/ lesbian- but I'm married to a man, and have kids. When I was dating boys in my teens we frequently got mistaken for a gay couple...
Probably, if I'd known the possibility of getting hormone treatment when I was a kid, I would have jumped at the chance- but I think I've grown to accept myself as more 'other' these days. Strangely enough, in my childbearing years I actually looked quite womanly for the first time ever- and felt comfortable with the role- I actually embraced being female for once and it was quite a shock (mainly nice, I think) for my husband who was used to the tomboy he'd married. It didn't last though, and now I'm thinking that I'm probably pansexual, or... Oh, god, I don't even know the terms for these things any more... I'm out of the market now, obviously, but I still think about gender roles and stuff a great deal. It would be great if it didn't matter, and you were just *you*. Most of the people I am attracted to are androgynous/ masculine females, but I like some men a lot too- and it basically doesn't matter a jot to me *what* sexuality/ gender folk are- if they have that certain something. I just wish there were more people who were as mixed up as me!! Sorry if I misuse terms though- not out to offend, It's just a long time since I was on any scene- and things have moved on a lot...
