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is the term transgender compatable with how you view yourself

Started by stephaniec, December 15, 2014, 06:35:42 PM

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Susan

Quote from: Auroramarianna on December 18, 2014, 10:56:25 AM
Edit: also I would like to ask where we can view and read policy. It is not very transparent. I mean no offense though.

We have an entire forum dedicated to it.

https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,492.0.html

I moved the no more games post to the site policy board, it was in the announcements forum which also can contain site policy.

This was Joanna's goodbye post which the moderation staff properly removed.

Quote from: Joanna Dark on December 18, 2014, 09:12:34 AM
The term intersex is not under the transgender umbrella. It's not intersexual, either. It's just intersex woman/man. I'm intersex. There's no suffix. Not an intersexed. Not an intersexual. Most intersex people don't even transition. Also, just cause you have money and a site doesn't make you the arbitrator of all things trans.

Also, about your umbrella, which I feel has bent arms and is all twisted: maybe some people (transsexuals)  take exception to being called ->-bleeped-<-s as if their problems were some fetish. Ban me. Neg me twice. Whatevs. But you're wrong. I speak for myself but I bet there's plenty who agree. Why am I at this site? Hmm, I ran a site once and for a so-called inclusive place, that's a strange question. But I'm a millenial so maybe I'm just some self-absorbed twat.

BTW, because people don't like a term they should leave? This attitude is why 75 percent of the good posters left. Posters with something to offer, real experience. I mean I'm two years on HRT almost and I'm prolly one of the longest ones who posts on the reg.

She has a high opinion of herself.

Being part of the Transgender umbrella term does not make you a ->-bleeped-<-. Just like being a part of the primate group does not make you a monkey.
Susan Larson
Founder
Susan's Place Transgender Resources

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Beth Andrea

Quote from: stephaniec on December 15, 2014, 06:35:42 PM
The term really doesn't bother me, I think if the term were to become more positive and accepting it would benefit the reality of our state of being.

Doesn't bother me...in fact I "own" it.  8)
...I think for most of us it is a futile effort to try and put this genie back in the bottle once she has tasted freedom...

--read in a Tessa James post 1/16/2017
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stephaniec

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Jill F

Quote from: Susan on December 18, 2014, 11:15:31 AM
Being part of the Transgender umbrella term does not make you a ->-bleeped-<-. Just like being a part of the primate group does not make you a monkey.

Could not have put it better myself. 

Oddly enough, I'm eating a banana right now.
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stephaniec

Quote from: Jill F on December 18, 2014, 01:31:01 PM
Could not have put it better myself. 

Oddly enough, I'm eating a banana right now.
wasn't there a song ' hey, hey we're the monkeys '
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bluebirdx88

I can't seem to find the vote option anywhere... My browser may be blocking it, but I doubt it :/

Anywho....

I guess the word 'transgender' makes sense, I mean if it wasn't for such a word we wouldn't have been able to search and find each other to talk about this topic in first place right?


But no.

I am a woman... Fullstop. The problem is that many people (Especially where I live, and most of my friends unfortunately ) See transgender as a noun, not a verb... And as a gender in itself,.. And to that I do not feel identified... I'm a woman who happens to be transgender, but I'm not a transgender.


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stephaniec

I don't know what happen to the vote option either , it happens to me all the time
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Susan

I removed the vote.  Came close to removing the entire topic.

I am a woman,  I am also transgender. I was born with male genitals. I am a transsexual and always will be.  Nothing I do will ever change those facts. But none of those facts make me any less of a woman.
Susan Larson
Founder
Susan's Place Transgender Resources

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ThePhoenix

Well, file this under posts of the type I don't usually make anymore.  But trans* language is a funny thing.  It changes so fast that even trans* people don't agree on what it is.  A couple of years ago, I was a guest speaker at the Transgender Education Association meeting.  I was the education for the evening.  But I arrived early and before the meeting started, one if the attendees, who had no clue who I was or why I was there, decided to explain to me what the words "transgender" and "transsexual" meant.  According to this person, "a transgender" is a person who likes to dress in opposite sex clothing now and then whereas a transsexual is someone who desires to change their body.

GLAAD will tell you that "transgender" is an umbrella term that encompasses anyone whose gender identity and/or gender expression differs from their gender assigned at birth.  Many, if not most dictionaries, will tell you that transgender refers to someone born one sex, but identifying as the opposite.  Some will say transgender and trassexual mean exactly the same thing.  Merriam-Webster has a definition on their website that seems to say only nonbinary people are transgender.  All of this, of course, is a way of saying that language around trans* issues is messy, confusing, and not always universally understood by everyone in the same way.

I don't know that I've ever heard anyone say that intersex is a type of transgender identity.   You do encounter quite a few intersex people in the trans* community which may not be surprising considering the number of intersex people who have ambiguous genitals that get "fixed" by being assigned to make or female when they are born.  Sometimes the "fixer" gets it wrong.

There are people out there who identify as intersex, who also identify as trans* (I am one).  But there are also a lot of intersex people who are fine with whatever gender they were assigned to at birth who don't consider themselves trans* at all. 

We all can have many identities outside of trans*ness.  For example, if you spell me out, then I would identify as an intersex biologically androgynous female identified asexual heterosexual leaning biromantic person.  But the intersex is an identity I have that is separate from the trans*.  It's an additional thing (that I don't much like to talk about).  I would hope others will accept and embrace me as a trans* person . . . who is other things as well.  One of those other things being intersex.
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stephaniec

I've never been tested , but I have some serious suspicion that I'm intersex in some way.
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ThePhoenix

Quote from: stephaniec on December 18, 2014, 05:13:19 PM
I've never been tested , but I have some serious suspicion that I'm intersex in some way.

There are some who would say that being transgender is, by definition, a form of intersex.  I suppose it makes some sense.  Think about the old way of expressing it as a man's mind in a woman's body or vice versa.  If that's actually true, then one could make a very good argument that all trans* people are intersex even if not all intersex people are trans*.

For more on this subject, see above under trans* language being a messy, funny thing that everyone tends to use differently. :)

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Natalie

I am whatever I decide to call myself. Nobody dictates how I see myself but me. I don't like either label and do not like it when people use it in reference to me. That's how I roll....
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stephaniec

The more I experience HRT the  realization is that estrogen is such a better fit for who I am . It really is so incredibly heartbreaking I couldn't of been helped so much sooner but you move on. In a sense all these labels  are really irrelevant because I'm just trying to optimize what's left of my time on this planet. I've never ever fit the male mold and truly I am female through all the tears of my existence. My birth is here and now. I have been me all along and that won't change. It just feels so good to be on the right path.
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Chloe

Quote from: stephaniec on December 15, 2014, 06:35:42 PM
The term really doesn't bother me, I think if the term were to become more positive and accepting it would benefit the reality of our state of being.

Consider myself third gender, what goes on here representative NOT is instead much more comfortable for me!!
QuoteLike the hijra, the third gender is in many cultures made up of individuals considered male at the time of birth who take on a feminine gender role or sexual role. In cultures that have not taken on Western heteronormativity, they are usually seen as acceptable sexual partners for male-identifying individuals as long as the latter always maintain the "active" role.
"But it's no use now," thought poor Alice, "to pretend be two people!
"Why, there's hardly enough of me left to make one respectable person!"
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jeni

I prefer the term transgender or transgender female at this point. Eventually, I will prefer to drop the transgender part, but I don't think I will be quite comfortable with that until I have at least mostly transitioned.

Since I do plan to go the SRS route, I suppose that makes me (or will make me) transsexual. However accurate and useful the term may be, I hate the word. It just puts more emphasis on the "sexual" than I'm comfortable with. Yes, of course, I know that "sexual" isn't a bad word, but there's a real risk that people will misinterpret that. For me, my dysphoria and discomfort is mostly to do with my gender and presentation, not with sex. When I say I'm transgender, I feel like that captures it much more accurately (even if it's technically incorrect as clinical jargon). But I don't expect this to ever be an issue for me. I would be really surprised if I came out to someone as a transgender female and they got the wrong idea.

Stretching to topic a little, at present I have a little trouble with calling myself a "woman." I think this is a combination of still inhabiting an obviously male body and simply needing more time to fully internalize the reality of finally accepting this about myself. When I "search my feelings, I know it to be true," but it still seems just a bit unreal.
-=< Jennifer >=-

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Zoetrope

I am fine with it.

I know many of us would prefer to be seen as their preferred gender, and its something I wrestled with for a while, too.

Now though, I figure if I get close to another person, and they somehow *can't* pick me, I will have to tell them I am trans anyway.

I just can't get close to somebody with a skeleton in my closest. Take me as I am, or not at all!


( edit:  this is why I have my forum gender set to 'androgyne'. Yes, I feel female and live as one, but I don't feel right saying I 'am' female. I'm actually much more comfortable saying I am trans ... )
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stephaniec

I don't know ,but at this stage I feel more trans, maybe in the future that will change I don't know
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CrysC

I see myself as transgender because I am not really a man anymore but I am not a woman yet either.  When I get there, I will be woman, or at least that will be how I present and advertise myself.  Currently I am not offended by any term targeted to myself for my in between state but if asked I say transgender or transwoman. 

It's rather hard really to describe this to loved ones.  Most I have talked to lump the entire T category into one lump.  I had to explain that no, I am not a drag queen.  No I don't now like boys.  No, this isn't to turn me on as a fetish.  No, this is not recent but something I have fought with my entire life.  I bet a good thread would be on the questions we have been asked.

From a medical basis, I suppose there should be a name used to describe the difference between our brain and our chromosomes.  GID sounds like a mental problem and if you are like me you identify more with having a physical problem where my body doesn't match my mind.   It would be nice if there was a non-transitional word and non-mental disorder phrase that one could use with doctors or those that need to know you were born with a different body.
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Elsa Delyth

I consider myself female -- not yet a woman, because muliebrity is a character one matures into, and involves social norms, expectations, and presentation.

I accept the title of transgender because that is the category that I must be placed in to be understood, and evaluated by society. It is my stratum, not my identity.
"If I can't dance, I don't want to be part of your revolution." Emma Goldman.
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TamarasWay

I see trans-gender and trans-sexual as good terms to accurately describe those who are changing or crossing over gender roles, (societal conventions) and, or changing / crossing from one sex (genitals), to another.

I think these terms have different meanings, describing or referring to different and distinct yet related conditions, those conditions being gender role as opposed to physical sex.

I can see where some people born with missing or ambiguous genitalia (intersex), might object to be labeled against their will as transgender or trans*.  It seems apparent to me at least that their issue has nothing to do with gender, but rather with their ambiguous sex, except perhaps that said sexual ambiguity would (could), make it more difficult to find a comfortable gender role or presentation.
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