How to get someone to stop talking about me being trans?

[eli8282]

So theres this girl at school, and i know she doesn't mean any harm, but she brings up me being trans a lot and it makes me really sad. I'm too nervous to talk to her about it...wt do i do?? What she does is like one time i said i wanted 4 kids, and she was like: but how do YOU have kids? I mean are you ganna actually carry the kids?
And then another time she asked me if i'd ever had a boyfriend even though she knows im straight. I have to be super careful what a say around her cause anything even slightly linked to being transgender she does this. Its really annoying and makes me uncomfortable around her. Please help

[Paulette]

She is a gossip.

It's very hard to stop gossips because they get strong reinforcement from their listeners. It's no good trying to battle her through counter-gossip. She must be confronted, and you must confront her. That may be painful to you, but there is nothing else that works.

Begin by saying how much it hurts you - accept no excuses from her. You feel hurt, and it doesn't matter to you what she thinks about it or how it feels to her and how she thinks others feel. Tell her she must stop. No threats, no if you don't I'll . . . , Just stop talking to her, and tell those listening that you won't participate in any group that does not respect you, and leave. You will soon find which people are worth your friendship and which aren't.

Nobody needs to befriend a vicious gossip. Eventually, nobody will.

[Above Linden]

Much as Paulette said. The best to way to get her to stop talking about it, is to directly confront her on the issue, and ask/tell her to stop. For someone like her, this is likely the only way to get her to stop doing what she is doing. If that fails, then obviously, her intents aren't good, and simply ignoring and refusing to talk to her will probably suffice.

[Ms Grace]

You say you're too nervous to talk to her about it but short of avoiding her completely, almost impossible in a school environment, you may have to.

What would you say to her if you weren't nervous about telling her? It doesn't have to be much, just something along the lines of "I'd really like it if you'd stop asking me questions like that, it makes me feel bad about myself. I don't have the answers for everything yet but that doesn't mean I'm not trans, OK?"

Short of that you'll have to stop talking about anything that's gender related around her. She may be a gossip but she might just be genuinely curious.

[AquaWhatever]

. I think she's just curious and she doesn't know alot about being trans.
I would just confront her about it and maybe educate her a little.
I don't think she means too be a pest about it.
I think you should just tell her in private and explain to her why it's inappropriate asking certain questions
maybe even answer some of her questions.
take it as your explaining Math to a 3year old lol.
lots of questions, and they won't get it just yet until they done it 4 or 3 times.

[FTMax]

If a conversation is daunting, you could consider writing her a note and keeping a copy of it for yourself. You'd be able to get all your feelings down on paper, you'd be able to consider rebuttals to any questions or arguments she might make, and you'd have it for future reference should you ever need to use it again.

[beccacurls]

I agree with Paulette. You need to let this person understand how the gossiping hurts.

[Sydney Spitfire]

I agree with the user above and also believe that you should sit them down and tell them how their actions are hurting you and if that if that doesn't work you should go speak to a adult/someone you trust