Lost and alone( poss Trigger)

[Phyliciaraine]

So this has been a real bad valentine's for me.  It was my first one as a single woman.  Me and my wife have become roommates more than anything else. We are still living together and Co patenting our kids, but there is no romance or affection anymore. And she is looking for a boyfriend,  or wants to.

I had several good things smashed in to dust. My insurance last year had the excusion for trans surgery clearly stated.  So i started this year working to get it covered.  But guess what, you can only see a full list of what is not covered AFTER you sign up.  And it's more restrictive than last year. So no luck there.

Also the VA was one hopeful option, but it was explained to me that the standards of care will not be revised until 2018. So no hope there.

I just want to have my wife hold me like she used to,  and make everything else melt away.  But i can't anymore.

Then to top it off,  i REALLY bit my cheek hard during the night a few nights ago. And it hurts so bad is next to impossible to eat or drink anything for the last 2 days.

I just needed to get this off my chest,  I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of feeling like I'm all alone.  I don't know what to do anymore other than keep getting through every day hoping the next day will be better.




~Phylicia

[Mariah]

Phylicia, we are here for you. Vent all you need to that is part of why this place is here. I'm sorry that your stuck between a rock and hard place like that. I can only hope and pray your insurance and coverage situation improves to help cover trans related surgeries. I hope your cheek feels better soon. Hugs
Mariah

[ChiGirl]

This is a safe place and a good place to remember that you are not alone.  I had a therapist tell me that after I came out.  You are not alone.  It stuck with me.  You are not alone.  Even when are, in spirit, we're here for you. 

Good luck and hugs!

[Alaia]

Sometimes we go through times alone to help us love ourselves better. Just think about it, if there's any love you deserve more than anyone else, it is the love from yourself. <3 <3

[missymay]

(((Hugs))) 

[Lillyblack]

oy,

me too. i got a really sweet and corny valentine's day card from my wife(she left it in the house for me) and i cried for the rest of the night. sorry honey.  it's pretty crappy. but i just keep trying to keep love in my heart. so sending you hugs.