To tell or not to tell...

[VikingArchangel]

So there is a girl at work who asked for my number the other day. She's really cute and has this very forward, energetic personality, so now we've been flirting back and forth a bit for a while. Today I've apparently graduated from "cutie" to "sexy", and she said she has a crush on me. I like her, too.

But here's the thing - she's straight. She's told me about her ideal husband, etc... And she doesn't know about my transition - I'm not out at work yet.

Anyone else ever been in a similar situation? I'd like to ask her out...but I don't want to be lying to her. At the same time, it'd be pretty sh***y of me to just stop talking to her cold turkey.

Ideas are greatly appreciated!

[stephaniec]

go out with her ,nothing wrong with finding friends and exploring life. Honesty is the best policy , so go with the flow and see how it goes.

[Elis]

I don't want to offend anyone but I think you should tell her, away from your other coworkers of course. It'll only be worse later on if it turns into something serious and she's straight, you have to respect that.

[VikingArchangel]

Thanks, folks!

My stupid capricorn brain is doing it's analytical, organizey usual and over-thinking the situation. Well...it's not like they're not going to find out at work pretty soon anyway, with spring coming up and hoodie weather going away.

Favorite song ever applies here.

"Have no fear, and don't look back! The afterlife awaits!" (Alestorm - "Captain Morgan's Revenge" This girl's a metalhead at heart!)

[Wynternight]

Life is too short not to live but we have to be careful so...be careful!!

\m/

[StrykerXIII]

My stupid capricorn brain is doing it's analytical, organizey usual and over-thinking the situation. Well...it's not like they're not going to find out at work pretty soon anyway, with spring coming up and hoodie weather going away.

I feel your pain. I'm a fellow Capricorn, and I do this literally all the time. Drives the missus insane.

On the subject, though - being up-front with someone about yourself is a pretty important thing. I wasn't up-front about being trans with my fiancee, and it caused some pretty nasty speed bumps. We recovered, but still. I do believe that pulling her aside and chatting with her about it away from prying ears may be the best move.

[VikingArchangel]

1) Kudos to Wynternight for linking the song. *hoists pint of rum*

2) I told her. Not sure if she still likes me (THAT way), but she reacted to the news like she thought I was going to tell her I was a serial killer, and found out I secretly like to repaint parking spaces at Wal-Mart or something. Not an issue at all. GOD - this girl is freaking awesome!

[Elis]

1) Kudos to Wynternight for linking the song. *hoists pint of rum*

2) I told her. Not sure if she still likes me (THAT way), but she reacted to the news like she thought I was going to tell her I was a serial killer, and found out I secretly like to repaint parking spaces at Wal-Mart or something. Not an issue at all. GOD - this girl is freaking awesome!

That's great news, well done and now you have an ally at work which should make coming out to other coworkers easier 

[kao]

1) Kudos to Wynternight for linking the song. *hoists pint of rum*

2) I told her. Not sure if she still likes me (THAT way), but she reacted to the news like she thought I was going to tell her I was a serial killer, and found out I secretly like to repaint parking spaces at Wal-Mart or something. Not an issue at all. GOD - this girl is freaking awesome!

Nice work at least if nothing more comes from it you may end up with an awesome close friend that in the future may end up as more.  Hats off for having the courage to tell her though that is huge.  love the serial killer part of that made me laugh.

[Joanne Feliz]

1) Kudos to Wynternight for linking the song. *hoists pint of rum*

2) I told her. Not sure if she still likes me (THAT way), but she reacted to the news like she thought I was going to tell her I was a serial killer, and found out I secretly like to repaint parking spaces at Wal-Mart or something. Not an issue at all. GOD - this girl is freaking awesome!

Thats great you told her.  Who knows maybe she will still be interested in you!  About the spring time and tshirts is your chest getting really obvious now?

[VikingArchangel]

Mhmm. Tight sports bras don't pass muster anymore.

[Sabrina]

Best advice I can give is to be careful. Though if she basically asked you out, you have that working in your favor. She must see something in you. You'll know when the time is right to tell her.

[alexbb]

"2) I told her. Not sure if she still likes me (THAT way), but she reacted to the news like she thought I was going to tell her I was a serial killer, and found out I secretly like to repaint parking spaces at Wal-Mart or something. Not an issue at all. GOD - this girl is freaking awesome!"

haha i love it!
girls you can rely on are worth their weight in pressed latinum; you might have to listen to a bit of how her colleagues are all dicks but she'll help you with make up, clothes and drag you out on the town. Its the best!! and you never know she might still be into you! stranger things have happened!!

[VikingArchangel]

@alexbb: "Species 180. Ferengi. You will be assimilated." 

She's full of questions - some a bit uncomfortable - but she has this adorable way of asking innocently without any malice, so I don't mind answering.

Oh, and her colleagues *are* all dicks. Except for about eleven or so of them. She works at a different location in the same company (not far apart), and part of my job is reviewing the CCTV footage at their site for the illegal kind of shenanigans.

[stephaniec]

1) Kudos to Wynternight for linking the song. *hoists pint of rum*

2) I told her. Not sure if she still likes me (THAT way), but she reacted to the news like she thought I was going to tell her I was a serial killer, and found out I secretly like to repaint parking spaces at Wal-Mart or something. Not an issue at all. GOD - this girl is freaking awesome!

well, the big obstacle is out of the way

[Vanny]

Chemistry is amazing so are the doors that get opened. 


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