One more question before I finally go to bed...
After years and years of repressing a lot of things...how do you open up again? I'm not referring to gender identity for myself, although I'm sure many people have a hard time expressing that as well. When I was a child, for various reasons (we won't go into that too much here), I basically shut down my entire personality to try to make everyone happy. My grades were never good enough (but I never made less than a B), there was always something wrong with a play I made in sports, I wasn't quiet enough, etc. Basically, there were some severe parental issues that made me in effect, destroy myself and recreate a hollow shell of a person. There are also some severe trust issues that go along with all that. Then, as an adult, I overcame a lot of that stuff and became who I am now, but when I trusted people, most times it did not work out well, and I am down to a very few real friends.
So, how do you start to trust people again? It's a hard question, but if anyone knows any sort of personal "excersises" that might help, I would appreciate it. I've become rather cold hearted and apathetic these past few years, which, on one hand, helps me not care about what other people think, but on the other, it makes it very difficult for me to care at all.
Well, I'm just a confused mess.
