hospitality/gaming flirting and THAT line

[immortal gypsy]

I've worked just about everywhere in hospitality and gaming. I'm terrible with people's names but I can remember what you drink and your gambling habits fairly quickly. I speak bartender for most states of Australia, (yes it is a language here a "pot of gold" does exist") and I remember if you are a tipper.

In the industry flirting is a bit of two way street. The customers flirt with us so we may try and bend the rules s little when nobody is looking. (Give that charming drunk one last drink.  Reach into our tips and cover the few dollars to pay for a bet. A dessert that has been written up as wasted). While we flirt back to try and earn those tips, usually with a smile a laugh a joke. Some of it is customer service but it usually is the reason guys earn more from female patrons and vis a vie. Most of the time this is harmless both sides know the rules and know you ask them out and they turn you down that's it. No means no.

Last night during my shift, (I now work on the gaming side in a TAB). I had a regular ask "When can he take me out on a date." Not taking no for an answer he kept asking, finally I had to stop my duties and hide. We work by ourselves part of me was glad that it was quiet last night so I could go out the back, the other half wishes I had more people around for my safety. Yes he did leave (30min later) and yes I do serve from an extremely secure area with alarms, and yes he wasn't violent or aggressive just extremely pushy. Still I am a little shaken, telling this guy I'm just not interested in guys (true) didn't faze him. Plus I can't change me, I felt like I got a little lucky here but sometimes by being me I've walked away with two hours extra pay so...........

Thanks for listening, still a little rattled but glad she doesn't have to go to work tomorrow.

[BioS]

Next time that troll comes in, ask him if he wants to know what the concrete tastes like. Then drag him outside, make him bite the curb, and then hippity hop all over the back of his skull like Michigan J. Frog...

... I'm kidding kinda~♫ ^- ^

Regardless of where you work, you shouldn't have to endure harassment of any kind. Hopefully you're feeling a little better. I know I go to a bar here, it's a bit of a dive, but we have an EXTREMELY attractive bartender there named Mandy who gets hit on all the time. She just ignores it. But it's hard when it's from a regular (because that's regular business). You can always lie and say you've been seeing someone. I don't really agree with lying, but when it's to protect yourself from seedy old drunks, it can be necessary.

If it starts getting too bad though, are you able to just throw the guy out? I mean, hopefully it was a one time deal, but if he starts making those actions a regular thing too, it might be a good idea to make sure you are able to give him the boot.

[immortal gypsy]

Feeling a little better now (ranting and raving to some friends helped). Guess I'm not use to being really hit on, I mean I don't see myself as that beautiful just the girl next door.

Talked to my boss about him this morning among other things if he comes back and trys again, I am allowed to tell him to leave, but yeah..its something nobody should endure and normally I can laugh it off or ignore them, mostly straight guys when I was presenting male). This guy just hit me for some reason.

[BioS]

Good good. At least you know that you have your boss's support with the situation! I think that might help you feel more relaxed as well! And definitely talking or laughing about the problem afterwards helps out a ton. Glad you're feeling better~!

And most people don't know how attractive they actually are. Think of it this way; How many people do you see everyday and think, 'they're good looking.' but never say anything to them, or perhaps daydream about having a relationship with some random stranger because they are attractive to you? I know I do it. I think everyone does. Lots of people are bound to look at you this way too every day, he was just one of the ones who said something about it. ^^

[Hikari]

It takes getting used to for sure. One of the people I game with was talking to me about how I said I wanted to lose weght and his reply was "nonsense, you don't need to lose weight, I would do you."

I was just like "what?!" But most guys really do value women based on how much or little they would be interested in them sexually and that is something cisgender women deal with and have coping strategies for that was a very difficult thing for me to deal with.