Hi lemons,
On the surface this may seem contrary to what can be taken from many of these posts e.g. dressing slightly different etc.. What I find for myself to work, for lack of any other term I call it 'disarming', and can be done even if the method does not match how you really feel inside.
In my transition I began a slow evolution of how I presented to others. This change involved a slow pushing of the envelope, but not too fast, it was and is more about an evolution of allowing myself to take further and further risks. Rather than focus on how 'others' were percieving me, I concentrated of becoming comfortable with each new development. As I slowly began to see happiness in my smile due to my sense of accomplishment, it turned into confidence.
This turned out to be even bigger than how my style of dress etc. was changing, people would notice the authentic look on my face
first which had a big disarming effect and sort of short circuited further critical examination. For me this had an incredible feed back loop type of result: their smile increased my confidence which made my smile more genuine.....and so on.
Risk changed to YEAH! There are those rare people who will not allow their intolerance to be self examined, so when this happens, I say to myself: "Hmmmm, they are just not happy, but I am!" The smile gets bigger
. Dani
