What to tell people when I have metoidioplasty

MikeG500 · April 07, 2015, 09:08:30 PM

Hello. I am having metodioplasty with Dr. Miroslav this June. Only very few people in my life know about my transition. It will be when I am on break from work and school. Since I'll probably be walking funny and other things for a while, if I have friends or people who ask, what kind of surgery could I say I got that wouldn't really be a lie but would also not give away that I had sex reassignment surgery? Just asking for ideas. And I don't like to say its none of your business to my friends or even acquaintances so I would like to be as honest as possible without giving it away. I've thought of urethra surgery or something.

Also, if you've had metodioplasty I would really like to be able to connect with you maybe on facebook or email. It would be nice to talk to someone who has been through it or is going through it. I'm a stealth man and its hard sometimes. PM me if you'd like to connect.

Mike

sam1234 · April 08, 2015, 01:25:08 AM

I had a radial forearm phalloplasty and did it between semesters. I just told people I had an accident, (my arm was bandaged and very obvious). Since it wasn't going to hurt anyone to tell a small lie like that, it didn't bother me. I can't remember how long the surgical site changed my gait, but its possible that it won't be as bad as you think. Even if it is, a simple, "fell onto the bar of my bike" would probably be understandable to any guy who has bashed his balls before.

sam1234

HeyTrace19 · April 08, 2015, 10:32:18 AM

I think if you just tell people you had lower abdominal surgery they can then form their own story about what procedure it may have been. Could be hernia repair, tescticular removal or repair, vasectomy, urinary tract stones...let them 'lie' to themselves about what it might be, so you do not have to do the lying. Most people will not pry and ask further questions, especially other men, as no guy really wants to talk about surgery in that area

Good luck with your surgery. I hope it brings you some relief.

sam1234 · April 08, 2015, 11:38:49 AM

One thing to add. I had forgotten about this. If you are getting testicular implants at the same time, you might experience some moistness between the scrotum and your inner thighs. Once the swelling goes down, the very top layer of skin may peel off kind of like a blister. The swelling cuts off the circulation to the first layer of skin, and when the swelling comes down, it just comes off much like a blister.

That won't effect how things look or be a problem, but I remember being really worried that the moistness would not go away, then wondered what was going on when the dead skin came off. So, this is more of an FYI and will hopefully stop a worry before it starts.

sam1234

MikeG500 · April 08, 2015, 02:07:55 PM

HeyTrace19: That is a good suggestion, thank you. And thanks for wishing me luck, I do hope I will feel better afterwards.

Sam1234: Thanks for letting me know about that man! That would be something I would probably worry about so it's good to know what it is. The thing about saying I hit my balls or something, is that I am the president of an engineering organization at my school and there are events I have to work on and be part of this summer, so I will have to tell my members and other officers I am having some type of surgery so they understand me not being able to do certain things.

sam1234 · April 08, 2015, 06:22:43 PM

HeyTrace has a good point about people not prying if they know you have had surgery anywhere near your privates. If they do, a simple "I'd rather not go into it" should stop the questions if someone is rude enough to try and get surgical details.

sam1234

MikeG500 · April 08, 2015, 06:37:43 PM

Yeah that's what I was thinking.

Another question I just thought of that I haven't been able to find. Don't know if anyone can answer this but:
I saw suggestion for amount of time before driving but all of them were for automatic cars. Does anyone know how long before I could drive manual transmission? That is what my car is and I'm sure that pressing the clutch down makes it more difficult than driving automatic.

yaka · April 11, 2015, 05:31:48 AM

Quote from: MikeG500 on April 08, 2015, 06:37:43 PM
Yeah that's what I was thinking.

Another question I just thought of that I haven't been able to find. Don't know if anyone can answer this but:
I saw suggestion for amount of time before driving but all of them were for automatic cars. Does anyone know how long before I could drive manual transmission? That is what my car is and I'm sure that pressing the clutch down makes it more difficult than driving automatic.

The delay before driving is due to emergency stopping (i.e. hitting the brakes hard) which may disturb things like stitches etc. That's common to both manual and auto cars.

I would however ask the surgeon.

Mackan · April 11, 2015, 08:39:23 AM

I had my meta done in December last year. I was off work for 6 weeks and I'm almost completely stealth just like you. Some people at work asked me why I had surgery and I just told them I had a pylonidal cyst removed. I actually do have one but I had it taken care of a few years ago. It's a cyst that sits just above your buttcrack and its very common for young guys to get it. If you have alot of hair and the hairs starts to grow inwards then a cyst can form and it's painful and might have to be surgically removed.

It was a pretty good "lie" because it explained why I wasn't able to sit properly on a chair and why I was walking funny and slow

MikeG500 · April 11, 2015, 08:24:50 PM

Quote from: yaka on April 11, 2015, 05:31:48 AM
The delay before driving is due to emergency stopping (i.e. hitting the brakes hard) which may disturb things like stitches etc. That's common to both manual and auto cars.

I would however ask the surgeon.

Pushing the clutch down on a stick shift is definitely something that would rub that area together, I think it has to do with that. But yeah I will ask.

Quote from: Mackan on April 11, 2015, 08:39:23 AM
I had my meta done in December last year. I was off work for 6 weeks and I'm almost completely stealth just like you. Some people at work asked me why I had surgery and I just told them I had a pylonidal cyst removed. I actually do have one but I had it taken care of a few years ago. It's a cyst that sits just above your buttcrack and its very common for young guys to get it. If you have alot of hair and the hairs starts to grow inwards then a cyst can form and it's painful and might have to be surgically removed.

It was a pretty good "lie" because it explained why I wasn't able to sit properly on a chair and why I was walking funny and slow

Haha, nice! Thanks for the suggestion!

Moots · May 11, 2015, 01:19:04 PM

This thread is a bit old but you could tell people it was hernia surgery. The incision for that is right by your crotch, it takes a few weeks of "babying" that area with no heavy lifting. There seems to be an unwritten rule that you don't go into detail or ask many questions about someones hernia surgery.

Jake25 · June 09, 2015, 01:18:23 AM

Quote from: MikeG500 on April 08, 2015, 02:07:55 PM
HeyTrace19: That is a good suggestion, thank you. And thanks for wishing me luck, I do hope I will feel better afterwards.

Sam1234: Thanks for letting me know about that man! That would be something I would probably worry about so it's good to know what it is. The thing about saying I hit my balls or something, is that I am the president of an engineering organization at my school and there are events I have to work on and be part of this summer, so I will have to tell my members and other officers I am having some type of surgery so they understand me not being able to do certain things.

Hope it turns out well. I can't wait until I can get this done.

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What to tell people when I have metoidioplasty