Did you ease into full time or jump right in?

[Emily E]

OK I haven't gone even part time yet so if you want to discount what I have to say I'm totally cool with that...

I'm a little bit of a planner so I've been thinking about this and in my situation I was looking at sort of easing into it just before I start HRT (start growing hair out and getting hair removed 6 months to a year before and start wearing women's slacks and button up shirts to work starting when the HRT starts wearing dresses/skirts on the weekends) and then going full time 6 months to a year in with a legal name change at which point I take a month off and get FFS and voice surgery then start to wear dresses/skirts when I returned to work (if they let me keep the job anyway) up and to the point I went full time I wouldn't be overt about it making sure I bound my chest while at work so no one would see any breasts that I develop till I go full time.  Its not really that I'm embarrassed (I'm sure I will be for at least a couple days) its more that I'm worried about loosing my job but if that happens I'll just get another.

[Sydney_NYC]

At 2 months HRT I starting dressing very androgynous but used the men's room. Sometimes I would get sir, other times ma'am. Around the 3 month mark I was getting weird looks in the men's room and ma'am was a lot more common than sir. Then at 3 1/2 months I decided to try full time since laser had gotten rid of most of any shadow. I was gendered female everywhere. I was suppose to take a trip to Florida for a conference for my wife's and I business and I decided that this would be the test. I didn't even pack any male clothes. On the trip I didn't have any issues, was gendered female the entire time and using the women's room wasn't an issue either. On the way home, I told my wife than now it was time to file for my name change.

[berkeleybear2015]

I eased in.  Started wearing female clothes out in broad daylight for purposes other than theme parties August of last year.  I steadily increased the frequency of wearing female clothes going to class, work, and town, and got to 50/50 about 3 weeks before starting HRT on New Years.  Got to pretty much full time in February. 

The thing that helped me most was that I live in a student co op, which is basically a house full of Berkeley hippies.  The mentality among my house mates is that gender roles suck, and that if someone breaks gender roles, they are awesome.  I remember last November, at least 6 male bodied, male identified housemates went to a bar with me and everyone wore dresses.  That was one of the more memorable nights of my college experience. 

[Kaley]

Wow, I was actually going to post a similar thread about this.  I think I'm in the same boat as you! 

I'm just part time right now (not out at work), but like you, I find that its starting to not really make sense to go out in "male mode" as it seems to confuse people a bit.  I was dressed androgynous today at work and was told by a co-worker (who hadn't seen me in a few months) that I needed to cut my hair because I looked like a girl.  My voice could still use quite a bit of work as its hard for me to maintain a consistent pitch, but it gets by ok if I dont speak super loudly. 

I'm going to try to get FFS done in December or January, but I feel like I might be holding myself back by not going full-time as soon as possible.  Probably shooting for a few months from now to actually go full-time...going to slowly ease my way into it at work.

[katiej]

Tomorrow is 5 months on low dose HRT for me.  And the dysphoria and depression were literally gone on day 2.  So the last few months I've been enjoying my estrogen-fueled mental stability.  The drawback is that I haven't had the feelings of desperation pushing me towards full transition, but it has helped me to make decisions with a level head.  And I've decided that with low dose HRT I could continue as a guy... if I had to.  But I really don't want to do that.

I have an appointment with my doctor this week, and I plan to kick up my dose.  I'm planning for a full transition of a year or so (hair growth, hair transplants, lots of hair removal), but sometimes genetics have a mind of their own. 

I'm doing reasonably well part-time, and looking forward to the next steps.

[Eva Marie]

I eased and eased closer and closer until I began experiencing male fails. I had been on a transitioning dose of HRT for about a year and it was getting harder and harder to conceal the changes. I was living as a female everywhere but work. The male fails pushed me into making a transition plan with my therapist and getting on with my transition.

One Friday I showed up at work as the male me for the final time, and the next Wednesday I showed up as Eva and i've never looked back. Of course that was all done with the knowledge and approval of management.

[Kellam]

I started by trying to ease in immediately after I fully accepted myself. I got hold of a few women's hiking and workwear garments that I thought I could sift in. I had always had a few such items to keep me sane. But outside of work I began dressing more and more and it felt so good to be that free. I wasn't working much but each time I turned up I wore less and less men's clothing. Then I talked to a trans helath advocate at my local lgbt clinic and said that I was trans out loud to another human being for the first time in my life. That felt so amazing that I was out to everyone I know within two weeks. By that time I had stopped wearing men's clothing all together. I'm still using men's rooms but I haven't had too in a month. I frequent places with unisex facilities. I have thrown out everything in my possesion that belonged to him at kept the things that are mine. I haven't legally changed my name but I am just shortening my birth name so that is not pressing. I am about to start hair removal, I am still bald but the hrt which I started a month and a half along my path of two and a half months, is working on that. I wear hats to cover and my short but growing remaining hair is doing its best. I am working on my voice but I still get a lot of sirs still but I am starting to get a few ma'ams and I get tons of ums. I also have been adding more and more feminine things. It is a slow process but it is helped by all my friends, coworkers, bosses and family using my name and the corect pronouns. For me it was all about shedding a lie, I needed to feel fully truthfull. This isn't about how good I look or don't at the core, it's about how I feel and I feel great. The first month of low dose was the best of my life and we just doubled up this past week. So, I don't know if I quallify as full time yet but I don't think I'll know when it happens. Part of me just wants to keep being a transwoman.

[acd_92]

I just pretty much jumped right into full time.

I came out to my best friend a few hours before her New Year's party. She was shocked but so incredibly supportive (and now she says it all makes so much sense)! And she did a lot of my coming out for me (with my permission, of course), which helped immensely, telling people that I now go by...and so on. From there I came out on Facebook and that was a HUGE relief. Once I did that I started fully presenting exactly how I wanted to, and it's been pretty smooth sailing since then. I have a pretty masculine face so I still get misgendered a lot, but I'm trying to do my best to focus on the feelings - how I feel, how other people tell me they feel around me - and hopefully HRT will help with a lot of that. It's only been two and a half weeks of it and so far I feel SO much better! I figured it would be best to jump into full time so that I wouldn't have to do any explaining to friends as I continue to deal with the effects of hormones at the same time!

I am still struggling with using the women's restroom though. I have had some days where I feel confident enough, but for the most part I'm terrified that I'll get called out as a "man using the women's restroom" - and we all know the stigmas attached to that...

But on the whole I am really happy with having jumped into full time and with where I am now!

[FairyHime]

I jumped in. Was into my third month or so of hormones and was supposed to meet a friend for dinner, but then I figured I wanted to go out with female clothing instead of having to bear guy clothes again. Asked him if that was cool with him, he said sure, and then bam, I went out as female and never looked back.

Getting to finally stop wearing guy clothing was an amazing feeling.

[noleen111]

I kinda just jumped in... for me it was easier... because I was moving and I decided.. at my new place I was a female... so the day I moved i kinda dressed unisex,... and from that day on I just wore woman's clothes.

[Christine Eryn]

I see a lot of what I have experienced in the stories of you good folks. One thing I failed to mention originally was the fact it has taken me years to get to where I'm at in my transition, and passing kind of fell into my lap if that makes any sense. I was on the fence about going full time and never looking back. The more I think about it, that's exactly what I'm going to do very soon. 

[Teela Renee]

I was on hormones for a year then I just jumped in

[stephaniec]

I just did everything in baby steps , but made sure  I kept moving forward until a few weeks ago I did the total full time.

[CrysC]

I've been on a slow slide for decades which took much a much steeper fall a couple of years ago.  Even so though, while I am on hormones and seeing a therapist, I can't go full time.  Not yet due to an agreement with my wife.  To be honest though, I wasn't ready until recently.  It's taken pretty much this entire time to get my chin clear.  I didn't have the confidence to go out with facial hair. 

Anyhow, you get the idea, my story is that I am easing into it.

[Erica_Y]

I jumped right in more or less however I tend to be terribly impatient so I was just being myself

[kellypatrick]

I planned on going full time a couple of months ago but still used boy mode in situations like going to sprotring events and going to the VA. But thanks to a friend of mine i have been full time and loving it.

[nicolegn7]

I eased into it and I think it's the best way in my opinion. Before going full time I was on hormones for about a year, had about 8 sessions of laser hair removal and started growing my hair out. The changes that happened that first year made me look more feminine so when the time to be full time came people where just like ok. I feel like it's easier and not as much of a shock then if you just wake up one day and put on a full face of Geisha and come out dressed.

[Jenna Marie]

I kind of ... stumbled into it.   Like someone else in this thread, I was full-time outside of work for a while before I noticed! I started HRT in February, and by about late March I was consistently going out as female but thinking that I might still choose to present male again, so I didn't consciously think of it as [mostly] full-time until it hit me in late April that it'd been at least a month since I'd voluntarily appeared as male anywhere but work.

At work it was a much more conscious thing, since we had to plan it and arrange things through HR and so forth. But I showed up as me in early June and that was that.

[Dodie]

12 months into HRT went full time... but had FFS and no choice at that point..
So in a way I jumped right in.. Took a while for me to get used to it.. now just no big deal.
The hardest part was deciding what I like to wear and make up.. now Its no biggie..
I think I went to fast... but that is kinda my way of doing things.. full speed ahead.
Dodie

[Ashey]

Jumped in I suppose. Or eased in quickly? In three months my breasts were poking through my shirt, my face was clear of hair and softened, fat had started to shift a bit, and I had incorporated some female elements into my wardrobe. So male fail came quick. At one point I went out in guy clothes, but carried a small purse. Even though I sounded like a guy, I still got ma'am'd. It just snowballed from there, I think because I got addicted to hearing that from people. Three months in, I waxed my eyebrows and hit total male-fail. Unless I talked, I always passed. A month later I went on a trip with a friend for a week and spent the entire time as a woman, testing the waters. Used the women's restroom for the first time (and several more times during that trip) and haven't gone back to the men's room since. Didn't have any problems so I went full-time. And I think soon after that my voice caught up. It feels like it all happened at once though.