Is it realistic to want to be stealth at school next year?

[perrystephens]

I'm going into my junior year of high school next year (a new school). I came out to my mom the other day and she's supportive of me going to school next year as male, but she's concerned for my safety. I know I pass from the neck up and once I have a binder and packer I'll pass all around (I'll have to figure out what to do with my voice or just become a mute, but I could try those voice training exercise things). My questions are:

1) Would I be able to go stealth if I talk to the school counselor/ pricipal beforehand?
2) Locker rooms: Do you think they would give me an alternative option?
3) What do I tell my mom about male bathrooms? She feels like they would be unsafe but it would be worse to go into a bathroom I don't fit in and just make it known to everybody.
4) Is there anything I should know, law-wise, or other that would help me?

I know it would be better to wait til college to transition but I can't take it much longer. I've been daydreaming about having a senior year/ prom night as a guy since middle school and I don't want to deny myself that just because I'm afraid. Anyway, this way I'll hopefully be able to transition sooner. I'll have a year of real life experience by senior year and may be able to begin hrt. So that's a plus.

[Ms Grace]

Hi - I can't answer any legalities about bathrooms, that will be a local state law thing.

If you chat with your new principal, school counsellor you'll obviously not be completely stealth and you'd need to rely on their support and discretion to stay stealth and safe. They might be able to furnish you with alternative to the boy's locker rooms and loos however that may draw a lot of attention too ("why doesn't Perry use the locker room??") which could breed it's own issues. Discuss it with your school - if they are supportive (hopefully they are) they will devise some safe but non obvious work arounds. Good luck, I really hope it works out for you.

[suzifrommd]

Are you in the USA? The US government has a set of guidelines as to how schools must treat their transgender students. I can dig it up for you if you need it.

[perrystephens]

Are you in the USA? The US government has a set of guidelines as to how schools must treat their transgender students. I can dig it up for you if you need it.

I do live in the US and it would be really helpful if you could find those guidelines.   

[Marly]

I don't much about the laws myself. But as for going stealth, I say why not. you are female.

[perrystephens]

I don't much about the laws myself. But as for going stealth, I say why not. you are female.

I mean stealth as in going as male but no one knowing I'm trans.

[Marly]

I mean stealth as in going as male but no one knowing I'm trans.

ahh...ok. well that's entirely up to you and whether you would feel comfortable doing so.