Want top surgery, but want to breast feed

[Caden]

Anyone else have this problem?  I suffer from dysphoria over my top half. I'd really like these balls of fat gone, and have a male chest, but someday I want kids, and breast feeding is important to me. So I figure they're not so big. Tiny really. I can bind pretty well with just a good sports bra.  I should stick with it. Put up with them until the future sprogs are weaned, then cut 'em off.

Only, then I wake up feeling more male than usual and I want them gone. I want to look in a mirror after a bath and not see them there. I want to have the option of going swimming without those stupid giant nipples poking through my suit. In fact I want the option to go out there in just trunks like the rest of the guys.

Thinking of another ten or so years of this is painful. Am I the only one with this dilemma?  Are there any solutions I haven't thought of?

[Dee Marshall]

Just blue skying here. I don't know if this is even possible and if it is it'll cost more in the long run. Could you have the fat removed with liposuction and leave the milk ducts intact?

[Caden]

I heard of a guy who I think did something like that.  Only he couldn't produce a full supply of milk and had to supplement most of it. Nice thought though.

[AleksiJason]

is there a reason u cant feed your kid with a bottle

[Caden]

Eh, I'm like really into early learning and health. You know, how to give your kid the best start in life, I've worked in foster care and adult care work and seen how parents can mess up so badly. My parents had kinda a blase go away and do your own thing, way of bringing me up and I struggled in school and had a lot of problems due to the diet I'd been raised with.

None of that relates directly to breastfeeding, but all I know is I want to look at my kid and know I tried my hardest to give them the best start I could. I don't want to do a half hearted job, and say 'well I tried' like my parents. And all the research I've come across says breast is best for health, iq, everything. (Which is no slight against those who can't breastfeed).

I guess I'm sorta obsessive with that kind of thing. When I commit to something I try 100 percent, and I'm honest enough with myself to know parenting isn't going to be any different.

And I know I probuly won't be able to have both the body I'm comfortable with and breastfeed. Just thought I'd post in case anyone had been in these shoes, or I was missing a really obvious solution.

Oh and the child having a mother is out since thus far I've only been attracted to guys. Plus I'm not so good at the peopling, so the kid might just have me.

[AndrewB]

I can definitely see where you're coming from in terms of breastfeeding for the kid's benefit, Caden; if nothing else, it gives them such a head start in the health department, due to passing on antibodies and such. However I doubt you'd be able to produce enough milk on T and with a lipo'd chest, but that's completely speculation on my part. I have a lot of conflicting emotions about raising a child, as I'd love to have it be my blood, but freezing eggs was just not in my budget. So really, adoption's my only choice; I couldn't stand to go off T long enough for childbirth, nor do I want to have to go through the attention I'd get with both a beard and a baby bump. Honestly I guess it just comes down to weighing your options. You may feel fine now, you may change your mind a couple times down the road, etc. Ten years is a long ways away to start planning, especially when life is so incredibly full of variables.

[Devlyn]

Hi Caden, welcome to Susan's Place! I googled "FTM breastfeeding" and found quite a bit of information, although I don't know what you've already seen. I'm going to look around here and see what we have too.

Hugs, Devlyn

[Alexthecat]

There's no guarantee you will produce milk if you leave your breasts as they are now. You can always get someone else's breast milk and then feed it to the kids. They even make special tubing that can be hooked up right by your breast so the dads can do it.

[Caden]

I can definitely see where you're coming from in terms of breastfeeding for the kid's benefit, Caden; might'vee ing else, it gives them such a head start in the health department, due to passing on antibodies and such. However I doubt you'd be able to produce enough milk on T and with a lipo'd chest, but that's completely speculation on my part. I have a lot of conflicting emotions about raising a child, as I'd love to have it be my blood, but freezing eggs was just not in my budget. So really, adoption's my only choice; I couldn't stand to go off T long enough for childbirth, nor do I want to have to go through the attention I'd get with both a beard and a baby bump. Honestly I guess it just comes down to weighing your options. You may feel fine now, you may change your mind a couple times down the road, etc. Ten years is a long ways away to start planning, especially when life is so incredibly full of variables.

True. Ten years is a long time. A lot could change. I'm leaning toward waiting a year or two to decide, and using that time to build up some chest muscle. It'll also give me some time to weigh things up. I don't want to make a decision then regret it. Thanks for your help.

Hi Caden, welcome to Susan's Place! I googled "FTM breastfeeding" and found quite a bit of information, although I don't know what you've already seen. I'm going to look around here and see what we have too.

Hugs, Devlyn

Thanks. I've played with google but got kind of swamped with information. The consensus seems to be you can lactate after chest surgery, but don't make a full supply of milk.

There's no guarantee you will produce milk if you leave your breasts as they are now. You can always get someone else's breast milk and then feed it to the kids. They even make special tubing that can be hooked up right by your breast so the dads can do it.

Donated milk is a good idea, so is the tubing. Neat. Thanks, I can research that. And true. I went totally overboard with the binding when these things appeared from nowhere, and I might've stunted them. It'd be stupid to put up with them all that time, and then they don't even work.

Thanks for the feedback. You've given me some ideas to think on. It seems to come down to pluses and minuses. I need to do some serious weighing up before I decide.

[jumpthenexttrain]

In the end, you should do what you need to do to make YOU happy. It's your life. Would it really be worth it to delay top surgery because you want children? I don't mean to sound harsh, it's just my opinion