Susan's Place Logo

News:

Based on internal web log processing I show 3,417,511 Users made 5,324,115 Visits Accounting for 199,729,420 pageviews and 8.954.49 TB of data transfer for 2017, all on a little over $2,000 per month.

Help support this website by Donating or Subscribing! (Updated)

Main Menu

Living a double life.

Started by Zoe the Obscure, May 30, 2015, 10:25:18 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Jamie2.0

Quote from: Zoe the Obscure on May 30, 2015, 10:25:18 PM
I am not fully out yet.  My career is as a fitter welder, and i fear coming out on the job is impossible if I wish to keep it.  I am curious, has anyone else been male drag at work and a women in your spare time?  Is this at all realistic or possible?

I have worked as a fitter / welder for the past 35 years.
Long hair was ALL WAYS pulled back in a ponytail.
Leather apron, and long sleeve shirts for fitting.  Full leathers when welding.
  Never could grow long fingernails, so no painting them, ( the oil form the steel would take it off ).
After work on Fridays we would stop in for a beer, and I would leave for home to clean up and get comfey.

   So in MY experience yes it is possiable to have it both ways !!   Y.M.M.V.

  Good luck,
  Jamie2
  •  

Tiffanie

I do not have anything to add.  I do know different states have different laws against discrimination for gender preference or gender expression.  I also know that even in these states with good protection that employers can be creative with their documentation to cover their tracks.

The double  life can be difficult, but if it is not causing too much difficulty then it is an option.  You still have to do what is best for you in the long run.

Lady_Oracle

I lived a double life for the first two years of my transition. It's not for the faint of heart, like its extremely stressful at times. If you have a therapist to talk things out with it'll balance things out somewhat but its still really tough.
  •  

Zoe the Obscure

Constructions trades are the worst place to be when trans.  If you come out they may have the reserve to not discriminate openly, but they will treat you like a freak.  I find that scenario too toxic to deal with.  I guess a double life is doable, but ultimately i need to change careers if i am to be accepted in the workplace.  Transition sucks, you lose everything.  Sometimes i ask myself if it is worth it.  Honestly it is not, but the there doesn't seem to be an option B.
  •  

Dena

Quote from: Zoe the Obscure on May 31, 2015, 11:49:28 PM
Constructions trades are the worst place to be when trans.  If you come out they may have the reserve to not discriminate openly, but they will treat you like a freak.  I find that scenario too toxic to deal with.  I guess a double life is doable, but ultimately i need to change careers if i am to be accepted in the workplace.  Transition sucks, you lose everything.  Sometimes i ask myself if it is worth it.  Honestly it is not, but the there doesn't seem to be an option B.
It may not seem like it's worth it now but believe me it was worth it.
Rebirth Date 1982 - PMs are welcome - Use [email]dena@susans.org[/email] or Discord if your unable to PM - Skype is available - My Transition
If you are helped by this site, consider leaving a tip in the jar at the bottom of the page or become a subscriber
  •  

Cindy Stephens

I am in "the trades" in a very conservative part of the US (Florida).  Fortunately, I am in the management end of it and have several college degrees related to the industry.  I also live the double life thing in order to maintain a relatively high income.  This has defiantly contributed to the maintenance of my marriage.  I have long hair, been on HRT for a decade, and had my beard removed.  If asked directly, I will not lie. 

I have found that if you are a good worker management will try to "fit" you in.  You just need a superior set of skills, experience, and a willingness to take on the hard tasks.  Maybe that isn't the best "forever" solution, but could it be, perhaps, the best step to get to your goal? Transition is expensive, and the trades can be a good way to finance it.  It may seem slow, but better to get there in a while than to jump ship too fast and end up underwater.  Just keep your eye on the prize, and work for it. 
  •