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Srs pressure ???

Started by kissxofxbeth, June 03, 2015, 09:50:09 PM

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Jennygirl

Take a good amount of time deciding. Speaking from my own experience, at first I wasn't sure. At around 1.5 years full time I though I really did, then at 2 years I realized I really didn't need it (yet, at least). I just don't have that much genital dysphoria to warrant such a change.

Your feelings may change over time as you go through transition, so there's no sense in rushing into it!
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Violet Bloom

  Only do what YOU feel is right.  I've never experienced major dysphoria about my genitals, and ever since HRT calmed things down for the most part in terms of spontaneous erections (full or partial) I've finally been able to ignore that 'region' throughout my day.  My penis also plays no part in effective sexual arousal and I have to intentionally leave it alone to get anywhere.  I have two distinct arousal-response paths and the male one is unrewarding, short-lived and useless to me.  My female arousal-response path can often keep going for hours and is rather like a relentless series of earthquakes!

  The only thing that might make me change my mind about SRS would be compatibility with potential partners.  I am lesbian but I've yet to re-enter the dating world because I don't feel ready.  I have no idea if my penis is going to be a consistent deal-breaker with purely-gay women.  At the same time I don't have enough experience to know if my penis could still be of some value in a relationship with female-bodied queer women or non-binaries.  I realize, in a way, this is like saying that someone else's preferences will decide my SRS fate, but it won't be because of someone else's mindset about whether or not I'm 'trans-enough'.  In the end, I'm not interested in being limited to having to seek out a 'one-in-a-trillion' accepting partner just because people who were otherwise great could not accept my penis.  A partner's preferences are important in a functional and loving relationship, so if I find the dating pool far too shallow then I may re-consider SRS.

  The only other observation I'd make about having my male parts is that I'm absolutely terrified by the prospect of using a women's locker room.  This won't decide it for me either though - it's just something I'll have to learn to be comfortable with or just simply avoid.

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Wednesday

Quote from: kissxofxbeth on June 03, 2015, 09:50:09 PM
I am wondering if anyone feels pressure to get or feel the need srs in order to "fit in" as transgender it seems like it's what comes to mind when someone thinks of gender variance
I don't want it and it scares me to even think about it but at the same time it seems to go hand in hand even though I know that's not the case

does anyone else feel this way?

what advice would you give someone
worried about some thing they don't want ?

Any thing elce you could say that would put my mind at ease?

Easy one.

In the past I let the pressure lead me to act "like a male", engage in "typical male activities" and try to fit as much as possible as "just another one of the dudes". Now, after my epiphany, transition, and embracement of my own reality (yeah, my "transness") I feel rather pointless to let the pressure lead me to any kind of surgery, beauty standard or procedure to just "fit in".

You know, when I overcame all the fears I had and transitioned, and embraced who I was, I just took the pressure out of the equation. I'm not allowing "social pressure" to influence so much my decisions anymore.

If I do something (this applies for everything), it's because I like it, because feels right to me. Period.
"Witches were a bit like cats" - Terry Pratchett
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Sandy74

For me this is all so new into realizing that there are so many others that struggle with the same feelings and desires about being a woman that I really don't feel pressure to have SRS, I think that if its meant to be in my life that I will gradually get to that point and if its not meant to be then it won't happen and I am sure I will be okay with that. I would be happy to just have breasts and that is it because then at least I know that I am half of a woman.

I am gay and not attracted to breasts on females but I would love to have my own, I know that sounds so strange.
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Dena

I am not attracted to women breast but i like mine as small as they are. You may find your self where I was. Able to survive without surgery but wanting to put everything behind you. The surgery is a graduation and not a goal and you are taking the right approach of exploring your options before deciding on surgery. In short not strange at all but it is a healthy attitude.
Rebirth Date 1982 - PMs are welcome - Use [email]dena@susans.org[/email] or Discord if your unable to PM - Skype is available - My Transition
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mfox

If I'm not mistaken, from a health perspective, the question isn't so much if you want SRS but rather a choice between an orchie or SRS?  If you choose neither, you are by default accepting the higher risks of long-term use of T-blockers and/or large Estrogen doses?

And what about tucking, can you tuck for years without consequences?  Or do you give up on tucking (..and passing)?

So I think there is pressure to choose a surgery from a health perspective, but of course it is your body and your choice, no one should pressure you.
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Naeree

Well speaking about health risk. Being trans both op or non-op are facing more health risk. Not that getting op and you will have lower risk. The common things that both op and non-op should do is taking estrogen forever, especially post-op where the body do not produce hormone.

Non-op
Taking T-Blocker of non-op on long term, you should take lesser dose. What can it posibly damage is liver. You can take lesser after time, and keep checking on your body health. Most girl take too much T-Blocker for long time that's the risk. But after few years on HRT, you don't need a lot of T-Blocker like when you start.

Post-op
If you go through many study of long term post-op there are many risk which not many people talk about it like low on self immune, body doesn't recover well when you get sick, high blood pressure (this happen to most older, bit higher on one who constantly take estrogen) and it can lead to liver disfunction and more. You know the blood flow system is everything.

So I don't think health issue is the pressure to make you get sex change decision... Both op and non-op have its health issue. What you got to do is stay healthy living, exercise, which is very important for us. Most trans avoid exercise cause they do not want muscle, which is no good. At least do cardiovascular regularly. And get your body check up every years.

Kibi

I am MtF, and very visually transitioned in my workplace and amongst my family within the past two years.

The only person who was a 'Jerk' to me was my father, asked me if I still had my balls... my response was, 'it does not matter', and I left it at that.

As for my Trans*peers in my community, I only dealt with one person in a support group that created a divide between those who went /aspired for SRS and those who did not.  I took my time after that discussion and approached the others with the same message that I will give you here.

Medical transition is not a necessity.  Accepting yourself, and your own gender identity is what matters most.

I never knew how deep my anxieties for acceptance were until I decided to socially transition.  My personal acceptance was the most difficult thing I have ever had to fight for in my life... and now I truely LIVE!

We all look different on both the inside and the outside.  A person living their life to LIVE is beautiful no matter how far they choose to transition.
I go by many names... I have identity issues.
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