Do we all go thru the same stages in changes (mentally and physical) over time o

[warlockmaker]

I have discussed this with my therapist, doctor and have been reading so many comments on this forum over the years and there seems to be stages of changes, both mentally and physically, that we all seem to go thru. Some of us are more intensely affected in certain stages than others. For example:
1.   The mental euphoria when we start HRT
2.   The changes in empathy and emotion and learning to cope with it, we are constantly evolving, on these. This has stages that affect all of us.
3.   The 2nd puberty. Breast development and other physical changes
4.   Libido changes
5.   Mourning process
Has anyone researched this? I have been trying to find more detailed information. 

[Anela]

#1   I could not believe how my body and mind felt starting the correct hormones. I knew I was doing whjat i needed
#2  No change, easier to drop a tear when never did before hrt but emathy did not change at all. emotions same thing, no changes
#3  I totally felt i was doing puberty all over again. I was learning just how much our hormones take effect on the nuerological system. the one thing us who transition have is a knowledge of what hormones do to us because we have experienced both.  people are rather mundane about this and have no idea what their hormones are telkling them. they hink their personality would be the same and the hormones only make physical changes. hahah, nope! I find it facinating  that we are the so heavily knowledged on this and the world around has never bothered to find out what we know about it and only scholors are to be the sayers of what hormones do.. they do not know much a all though if you look into their resurch. its all physical as i mentioned they think about it.

#4  The loss in sex drive was what i needed. Testosterone was giving me a sex drive that did not feel like  me. I am so happy that is over now.

#5  Strange but the Death of my guy i was is kind of sad in a way. He was stronger and faster at doing some things i still do. I rebuild boats and he could deal with the heavy things without it being such work, he also did not mind the dirt and i hate the dirty part... my sanders feel heavier now . lol my driving skills are not as sharp as they where but i am also less prone to accidents now with my more relaxed driving skills.

   Since nobody has researched this much I wanted to  give you my experience to compere your findings. I wish others to take you seriously and post as well.   Much love my friend!!

[Ms Grace]

Interesting, but I'd say a lot of people have very individual experiences...

1. I was pretty happy when I started HRT but I wouldn't say I was euphoric. I knew I still had a loooong way to go.
2. Some changes, not much - I feel I was already hugely in touch with my emotions, I just had to learn it was OK not to block them like I had been doing.
3. For me, because this was my second transition, it was like my fourth puberty. (puberty> first transition puberty> detransition puberty> retransition puberty!!) And I have to say this one has been the best yet.
4. Already lost that when I started anti-depressants four months before HRT. Woo!
5. Don't feel I mourned my old male self - I never identified as male even when I presented that way. I recognised I was still me regardless, that I not one part of me has "passed away" through transition.

[Rejennyrated]

Well in my psychiatry training one of the things they taught us is that in most situations with identifiable "stages" like this its not neat and tidy, like do step 1 then step 2 then step 3... etc. Maybe everyone goes though aspects of those stages but not necessarily in that order and not necessarily just the once either... indeed at some points you can kind of drift in and out of all the stages though the day as you move from one situation to another.

Also I would say there is a #6 - which is finally realising that perhaps all the other steps are an illusion, because you are actually the exact same person you always were, just a little older and wiser, and hopefully a lot happier with your physical form.

[warlockmaker]

This research started when I was having an intellectual conversation with the former head of Phsycology at Stanford. You are all correct, Rejennyrated, Grace and Anela, we all go thru the same stages but maybe in a different order and intensity. The psychologist brought up the stages that people go thru with to accept death from cfrom terminal illness as an example. Its a very complicated subject and I have only just found out its one area that psychologist are trying to further understand.

[Cindy]

I wrote a reply when you originally posted but then lost the internet connection as I was posting! I hate that!

I think these steps are quite common, they vary of course. I had no mourning, I admire my former male id for looking after me and being strong. He has gone, but I don't mourn him.

I also agree with Jenny in regards to 'reality', so many people think that by transitioning, be it whatever steps they take, will solve their problems. I doesn't, it may solve one, but life is still life.

There is an additional step that came up when I was working in the field of kidney transplantation. Most patients did mourn, not for themselves but for their donor. In those days most grafts came from cadavers, and it hit patients quite hard to know they had another chance at life because someone else had died.

It is an interesting area.

Nice thread, thank you.

[katrinaw]

1.   The mental euphoria when we start HRT - No mine was realising that GID existed and I realised that I was not alone. However, I was very excited, bubbly when I started HRT; then...now what? maybe I was expecting some sort of emancipation?
2.   The changes in empathy and emotion and learning to cope with it  - Definitely became more personally involved with joy, sorrow and emotions, not just mine either. This has been one of the biggest changes in me, and has been permanent, especially crying over joy and unhappiness, coping but certainly not under control.
3.   The 2nd puberty - took me a long while, but puberty brings emotion swings which I certainly had... but gradually managed to keep that under control, the physical changes were slow, but loved living the changes (I had waited a very long lifetime)
4.   Libido changes - yes, very quickly, although I had lost some interest after discovering my condition was real and not just in my head, within 6 months I was struggling and beyond... hmm
5.   Mourning process - No I have not been there yet, am I lucky? or have I not realised that? Have I really lost anything / or something I never got on with?

[Sam Alexei]

1.   I definitely had this, and it hasn't completely gone away yet.
2.   The only really noticeable emotional change I've had so far is being less anxious and depressed and more balanced. I can still cry and experience the same range of emotions, but in a more positive way.
3.   The 2nd puberty - check. Voice cracking, muscles building, and hair everywhere.
4.   Libido changes - double check. My sex drive is through the roof.
5.   Mourning process- yes and no. The only real thing I had to get used to was that my entire ego and all of my self confidence when presenting as female came from OTHERS liking how I looked. I did not have my own self esteem because I was not presenting as ME. Having my own self esteem and not relying so much on others took some getting used to.