what my doctor did to me and is this the norm?

[Shana-chan]

I'm hoping this was the best place for this thread, or maybe the transgender board would've been better? Anyway, today I went to see my doctor, who is female just so you know. It started out well, the whole staff and doctor called me by the right name, but I don't recall hearing any pronouns used. Then when the doctor came in, she examined me like I'd wanted (I was there to see about something below) but for some reason, she said she couldn't examine me without another staff member present... (I'm MtF by the way)

Naturally I was offended, but put it out of my mind to focus on the exam and not cause a scene. Thankfully it stayed out of my mind for hours but while grinding in a game for items and exp. (which can be boring so you start thinking of things) I ended up thinking about what happened at the doctor. Needless to say, I'm very upset, depressed and want to cry and I can feel the tears there but they won't come out. I mean think about it, if I didn't have those parts down there and instead had the right parts there's no way she would've done this right? It's basically her saying she's worried I'd rape her which is a load of BS! I'd never do that and further more people would hear if this happened.

So, is this the norm that doctors do or should she not have done this? Advice please? Has this happened to anyone else?

EDIT: She also didn't give me my tetanus shot, claiming the company that supplies her with the shots is for whatever reason saying they don't accept my insurance which is bs because I know my Medicare covers tetanus shots. She said she can call in it to a pharmacy but not happening till I get my name legally changed, whenever THAT happens...

[Jenna Marie]

I don't *know* what her reasoning is, obviously, but I've been told by my doctor's practice that the opposite is true - that they always have a second nurse in the room with a female patient to protect her from the doctor (and presumably to cover the doctor's butt if they're accused of misbehavior with a patient, though they didn't say that part). That's true even with a female doctor, just in case. And they follow this policy with my wife and with cis women I know, so it's not just making something up to placate the trans woman.

[KittyKat]

I worked as an Army medic for 5 years and any time a PA or Dr had to examine any personal areas they also had a medic or nurse chaperone for patient and provider safety reasons.

[Rejennyrated]

NOPE you are quite incorrect Shana. Its completely standard procedure if the doctor feels there is any possibility of the patient later claiming that the examination was not carried out with dignity, respect and properly, then we are INSTRUCTED to ALWAYS insist on a chaperone being present. This for protection of both the doctor and patient and its irrespective of gender, because, for example, a gay male doctor would be told that they must offer a chaperone to all male patients because of their sexual orientation.

Its good practice to offer one as an option at any time of an intimate examination anyway, but doctors are told that they can and should insist on one compulsorily where there is any doubt in their mind as to how the patient may later react to any part of what they are going to say or do. So your doctor was if anything being ultra correct and you have absolutely no reason to be offended.

I'm guessing the doctor was younger... because this is something that has much more strongly taught to medical students in the last ten to fifteen years. Older doctors may not be in the habit of it and so may break the rules from time to time, but I for example, would always insist on a chaperone at any time when I carry out physical exams because otherwise I could lay myself open to later complaints, because of my own gender history, and much as I love you all, I just ain't risking my medical license in that way.

[Anna R]

This has happened to me , not all the time but a few years ago I had to have a hernia examination and the doctor was female.
She asked me if I required a second person present as technically in Australia at least it is preferred.

[Marlee]

Standard practice here in the USA. I never noticed it, really, cept for the prostrate exam I had a few months ago. (a female doctor) But I recall now that every other time a doctor was doing anything other than talking to me, there was another person in the room. I'm just surprised she said what she did. They typically just do that..a second person there with paperwork making notes or something like that.

[luna nyan]

It's pretty much normal practice for examination of more personal areas for everyone's protection, all the more so where the patient is a minor (general outline only).

Sometimes consent forms are signed by the patient and witnessed by the assistant on duty.

It's easy to read too much into this sort of situation, but I'm pretty certain no offence was meant, but it sounds like it could have been explained better.