How different would you guess your life wold be without being trans

[stephaniec]

I've thought about this trans issue so much over the span of my life and I think for me this trans thing caused a lot of head ache through the years, but I don't really know that my life would of been all that different if I hadn't had to deal with it. Yes, if I would of been able to transition in childhood it would of been a whole lot different in the relations I had with the world. The thing is I have to live with the way my life played out and I can't see the difference would really of been substantial if I had not had this particular issue. Without transitioning earlier I think I would of played the cards dealt the same. Except for not the extra pain I would of had the same friends , the same education , the same career, etc. If I had not this trans issue my relationships might have of been better and maybe I'd been married with children and a house with the white picket fence and my beautiful Belgium German Shepard in a nice yard. I don't know. I would of been gloriously better born a cis female, but if born the same but not with the trans issue I think the only difference for me would be the happiness issue which is of itself big, but not in relation to the type of life I have lived. To be honest , I've not been successful , but I do like myself. I doubt not having this trans identity would of let me be more successful .

[ikanote]

I've actually wondered about that a lot. I distance myself from people when I was in middle school because I felt odd when around so many guys.. I was treated a lot like a cute little boy so not many people took me serious. I was scared when one day someone would find out I wasn't normal.. There was this girl who I really liked a lot but I hated myself so much I couldn't tell her even though I knew she liked me too.. If I wasn't trans I might have better as a person as well. I am still young but my personality kind of shaped out to be emotionless.. I can't feel bad unless I know what it feels like. Not what I wanted to become.. But despite being emotionless at time.. I am very gentle and kind to people and this might not have been me if I wasn't like this. This is a really hard topic considering we will never really know.

[Rejennyrated]

I'm probably the exception in that I dont think my life would have been all that different - and it certainly wouldnt have been any better. If anything I think I would have achieved less and probably been more dissatified - because I would still have had similar ambitions but I would have lacked the sand in my oyster shell to make me form the pearl.

I'd probably have settled for a boringly ordinary life bringing up my family and doing whatever job came along - and that would have been a waste. So yeah oddly enough I do give thanks for being born as I was every single day.

[Randi]

There are two ways that I might have been "not-trans".  I could have been a CIS man or a CIS Woman.

While I certainly would have felt better as a woman, I realize that, being born in 1949, I would have had much fewer opportunities than a male born that year.  I remember in the 5th grade during a very cold winter where the girls HAD to wear a dress.  They could wear blue-jeans under the dress, but they had to wear a dress.

I would probably have been directed into a female career, such as a schoolteacher, nurse or store clerk.  I would certainly have earned less.  There would have been intense pressure to attract and marry the man with the best economic situation.  How many women my age married the man with the best bank account or prospects instead of the one they really loved?

Women today seem to have it all, but women in 1950 were severely constrained in their life choices.  As much as I want to be a woman today, being born male back then might have been a better choice.

[Naeree]

I use to think about this topic too. I start my transition 10 years ago, where I fresh college graduated. That time the trans right and equity is not progressing as much as today. If I do not transition at that time, I might stay as a guy or probably a gay guy. I guess, I might get the better job, I might really have the progress in my career in the past ten years. But I also might end up start my transition later anyway, so who know right  Anyway, I notice one thing that since I start my transition, I work really hard, it's like I was trying to prove myself.

[RavenL]

Great topic and very interesting! While it hasn't been that long since I've realized myself as trans I've thought about my life.

Staying male would have brought me to ruin most likely. The last ten years of my life have been miserable for me. And its not hard to see myself dead before thirty if I didn't change. Way too much stress and anger built up inside of me. Also really wasn't doing a good job taking care of my health. Always wanted to go to college but the old me lacked confidence and most likely would never take the steps necessary.   

[herekitten]

"I would have lacked the sand in my oyster shell to make me form the pearl"  

I feel it would have been the closest to this statement made by Jenny. Sometimes as girls, it's only natural to wonder what it would have been like to live life as a guy-guy. Just discussed this yesterday with a tgirl friend of mine who knows me well.  I was raised female with females. It was providence is what I tell myself. The 'sand' in my life has been what is twixt my legs and without that biological mishap, I would not have formed the 'pearl' which represents my life 

[Northern Jane]

I have a pretty good idea how life would have gone if I had been born female because I was head-over-heels in love at 13 and if I had "the right parts" I would have been a disappointment to my parents and pregnant by 16. I would likely have been married right out of high school (if not before) and spent my life raising 4 to 6 children instead of having a career. As it was, I was still a disappointment to my parents LOL! (I transitioned in 1974 at the age of 24.)

[Swayallday]

I would've had a youth.
I wouldn'tve felt so confused.
I'd be accepted. Not entirely, everybody has their quirks but I would have made more friends.

I would've gone through puberty and have interest in sex and so have a healthy sex life.

I would've been determined in following my dreams rather then not giving any and waste my days away being high.

I would've grown as a person, loved, finished school and specialized. I could've been professional by now.

Yes, I would have loved much. Married.

Building a house, saving up or loaning for a house to have children

See them grow up

Seen the world.

Not sure what you want to have from this thread but this is how it is...

Sorry if this rubs the wrong way
We shall see what the future brings...

[stephaniec]

just curious, I didn't transition until I got in my 60's , so other then the effects of depression I'm not sure if having this trans thing made much of a difference in how my life went as far as what would of happened if I wasn't affected by the trans issue. If I transitioned a lot earlier it would of made a big difference, but I'm not sure other then happiness and stable relationships I wouldn't of ended up the same. Of course, I don't know, my life could of been leaps and bounds different if this thing eating me alive wasn't there.