The military could be a good choice.
Canada is several decades ahead of us on the south side of the border. Gay and lesbian people have been allowed to serve openly since 1992, I think. Transgender people, at least since 2000. In addition there have been a number of reports that say that SRS was done on the government's dime.
I've read a few comments online from soldiers that say things like "when I transitioned all that happened was that they issued me a female dress uniform. The work uniform is identical for both sexes". I'd link to that if the address wasn't hiding somewhere.
Whatever you decide to do, I wish you the greatest success in getting your life back together. And that you come out of this dark period with a smile on your face.
