Waitlisted

[takotsubo]

I took my first real step towards transitioning today by calling to make an appointment with a gender therapist. That's the good news. Bad news is I got waitlisted, and won't get an appointment for at least two months. So I'm feeling rather glum. :/

The clinic I called is the only one in my area that is specialised in HBTQ-issues and accepts patients without referrals. If I decide to go through with transition I need still need a referral from them to the one centre in my area ("ENID") that handles transitioning. It seems likely that there is a waitlist of several months to ENID as well.

My options now are:
1. Be patient. Two months is nothing compared to how long I've been carrying this secret, but now that I'm starting to open the lid I'd put on those feelings, it feels like an excruciatingly long delay.
2. Make an appointment at my regular psychiatric clinic.
        Pros: Might get an earlier appointment. They could get me a referral to ENID, and hopefully ENID would accept me even though have not seen a proper gender therapist yet. Best case scenario: it significantly reduces the time I spend on waitlist.
        Cons: They are not specialised in HBTQ-issues. I'd risk seeing someone with little or no knowledge and/or understanding of transsexualism. I've actually worked at this clinic, and while I could get lucky and get an appointment with a specialist in psychiatry, my initial meeting is likely to be with someone who has the exact same (rather limited) skills and work experience as I have. There is also a risk I might end up talking to an ex-colleague, which would be uncomfortable. Worst case scenario: it's an emotionally difficult detour.

A GP would not be able to help me, local protocol dictates that they can only refer me to a psychiatric clinic, not to ENID.

So what do you think i should do?

[Cindy]

Wait, 2 months is nothing. In Adelaide and most of Australia it is a 12 month wait!

Lots you can do in the mean time, electro/laser. Voice practice, RLE (if you are up to it). Getting clothes, thinking how you want to proceed, making plans of what you will do and when.

The time will go very quickly and all of those things will put you in a therapist's 'good books' in showing commitment.

[takotsubo]

Wait, 2 months is nothing. In Adelaide and most of Australia it is a 12 month wait!

Oh, that puts things into perspective. :-O
But yeah, I guess it is sort of a no-brainer. Especially since my SO just asked me to slow things down a little and give her a few weeks to digest the changes. It's just easy to get carried away.

[kristincardigan]

I had a similar situation. The specializing clinic had await of at least 5 months. I chose to still go to a standard clinic to deal with my anxiety and depression related to my GD while I waited. The time really flew by and it was nice to have someone to talk to. I'm now scheduled for the end of this month so it worked out nicely. [emoji5]️


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[SwedenMtf]

Hi Takotsubo. I guess ur coming from Sweden, since that's where the clinic ENID is located. The best thing you can do is to have a mindset that this will take awhile. I know when I started I thought everything would go like the speed of a rocket. But no. I waited to se a Psychologist (1month). She tried to write an referral to ENID but no - they wanted one from a Psychiatrist. Waited another month to see him - he wrote a referral. Then the waiting time until u see ENID is about 3-4 months depending on how fast the psychiatrist writes the referral.

However - I did not go to a LBTQ-friendly (Swedish: HBTQ) place. I just went to my closest hospital (aka. vårdcentral). You shouldn't be scared of meeting peoples judgments since your gonna live like this ur whole life. It's time to start coping with it. However - I didn't care if they weren't really read on the subject since I just needed their referral. So they thought I turned into a girl over the last couple of years, while I said I was born this way. They didn't understand it.. but what does it matter - all u need is to get to ENID. At least in Sweden you have too.

[KristinaM]

Yeah, this is a marathon, a long-ass marathon, not a sprint by any means.

Out of the gate I was like, "gimme gimme gimme gimme!" trying to suck up all the trans-related info I could find, experiment with makeup, clothes, underwear, social clubs and support groups, telling friends so I could have someone to talk to in person, etc...

Now that I'm 3 months in though, things have slowed down considerably.  I rarely wear makeup, I'm waiting for my first laser hair removal appointment, I have some girl clothes I wear to work occasionally (mostly slacks and shoes), but I'm just taking it one day at a time now.  Fortunately I'm on hormones already (nearly 3 weeks now!) so that probably helps, but I've gotta wait for that and for my hair to grow out, and for our new baby to be born in 10 weeks, and I won't tell any family until after Christmas so I don't ruin the holidays.

Read, read, read and read some more, go out shopping all day one Saturday and try on everything in the store, you'll get your fill soon enough and realize that it's not as big of a rush as you'd think.

Though I do need to find a new phone case/wallet thingy since so many of my girl pants don't have usable pockets!  And I'm not ready to start carrying a purse to work yet, lol.