Hey all,
bear with me here i'm inherently a shy person and pretty nervous, this post might not even make sense.
I just turned 25 years old in April, I work in the office of a Solar Company and love renewables! I'm a lil hippy lol. I went to Emerson college for English Literature with a focus on late 19th - early 20th century literature. By my name here some may be able to tell who my favourite author is

I am the oldest boy of two, my younger brother is 23 and lives on the Cape with my parents.
I got married to a wonderful woman when I was 21 years old, love her!
She and I have known each other since we turned 5 and 6, she is a year older than I, and we fell in love in our teens.
The thing she doesn't yet know, nor anyone else, is what i'm about to say here; so nervous lol!
Throughout my life I have identified myself inside as a Female.
I always looked at girls, even when I was younger, but never with lust; only envy.
I envied the way they spoke, looked, walked, interacted with each other, I was jealous that they had what I felt I was meant to have. I have always had 'girlfriends' we would just sit and talk for hours, go out and just be friends. I really couldn't have asked for a more understanding wife than who i'm with, she knows I have always connected better with woman than guys and doesn't make a fuss when I go out with my girlfriends.
From a very young age I knew I wasn't who I presented myself as to the public, I was always wearing a shield, a cloak, a mask. I can't keep living under this guise, I suffer from severe depression and have attempted suicide on more than one occasion.
I know most of what i'm saying is probably heard multiple times a day and is not new to most, I just need an outlet for this; a channel for these emotions.
I have so many questions for those at many different stages of transition, I hope I get the chance to talk and get to know everyone here!