So, as the subject states, I am on a trip to finally meet my father who I have never met personally. Cherishing the moment, but I have little to no worries. Only worry I have is that he will be surprised, I lost my phone and have no way of contacting him, and to mention I am homeless, he knows both that I am transitioning and even knows the details as to who I am, and that I am homeless.. Biggest factor is that he does not know that I am on my way to the state that he live at, I only recently started speaking to him, which was once on the phone about two weeks or go, maybe a bit longer ago. My mother would always bad mouth me to him, and only spoke to him once, maybe more, but nothing I can remember, except to straighten myself out.. Which was way long ago..
He offered me to stay with him, and I was planning to take a trip to see him and my other family, and it was a family reunion.. With distractions etc, I did not go.. Bummer, total bummer... I know nothing of the blood, ancestors, relatives and my grandmother who I never got to meet died 6 years ago, so another loss. I claim to feel that I would have got along with her and had no issues, even to accept me.. Maybe it is spiritual, she has passed, what happens to souls after.. Just lifted ya know.. As some claim, maybe in spirit she is with me.
Not trying to force it on my father but I know he will let me stay, agreed to it, and I want to simply work and enter college.. Easy.. Get in to get out.. But to be around family is a huge, lacked in that area my entire life so far. Just to see aspects of a reflection of yourself in others around you can be liberating.
Leaving my past behind, it will just be my past.. Few months I can have my own place and in totality have my life change.. I have lived only in liberal places to say.. State of California and New York mainly.. So making a spontaneous move to Alabama is a bit risky but they are just people.. All in all.. I have been through worse, unless they hang me or shoot me standing! Then there will be a problem.. maybe.. Do not expect it to be perfect, but not a TOTAL disaster..
Just venting.. One of my personal goals.. Last one on my list.. minus a career and an education.
Vent, vent, vent.. Nerves.. Big trip.. Solo Dolo..
